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Old
Feb 14th, 2012, 07:23 AM
  #11
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I wouldn't like that at all. DS was off a bottle shortly afer turning one and has never had a dummy. I would be trying to get her off of them but it is difficult not wanting to interfere tbh I don't think you can, perhaps suggest your OH does as it is his job as well as the mother's. There is no reason for a 4 year old to have a dummy or bottle.

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Feb 14th, 2012, 08:25 AM
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well Lana was 2 last month and isnt showing any signs of ever giving up her nightly bottle - i am more than happy for her to have it, its not as if she cant drink out of a cup, she can and does all day, just before bed she enjoys a bottle of milk

Jack was 4 and a half when he gave up his dummy, he only had it at bed time and when he was unwell - it never affected his teeth either. he got great comfort from his dummy and i didnt have a problem with it

both Jack and Leah were off bottles when they were 12 months

Lana never had a dummy

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Feb 14th, 2012, 10:40 AM
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I'd speak to the Mum. If it were my child, whatever the reasons I wouldn't want someone else making the decision without first discussing it with me. Sorry if that sounds harsh, but as you said yourself she isn't your child. I'm sure you have her best interests at heart, but if you and your OH are going to have joint custody going forward, then I think maybe use this as an opportunity to improve lines of communication with her Mum? I'm sure the little girl will benefit from having her parents working together on things?

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Feb 14th, 2012, 10:59 AM
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I personally wouldn't let my child have either at that age but at the end of the day it's her decision and it's not my place to judge. My sisters daughter still has a dummy and she is 4 x

I took a dummy off Liam at 14 months and bottles about a month later. Mainly because I have awful teeth (overbite) and I could see his starting to stick out a bit, it's probrably genetics but I didn't want them to be any worse. xx

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Feb 14th, 2012, 11:37 AM
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Stay out of it, and I say this very kindly-

If you bring up this issue with your boyfriend's ex, you're looking at creating a war. That's going to make things unpleasant for everyone. If her ex's pregnant girlfriend started to try and give her parenting advice... although well intended, is going to blow back up in your face.

(BTW I personally don't disagree with you on the actual subject)

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Feb 14th, 2012, 12:39 PM
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DS has a cup of warm milk before bed, he has since he was 2, he was capable at that age to drink from a cup, and I will do the same for LO.

DS is also a thumb sucker, he never sucked it at pre school, but he did when he came home with his 'special' cover.

I chose to give my LO a dummy, so I wouldn't feel right taking it off her, as its my doing which is why she is now addicted to it. I don't expect her to be walking around the streets with it in her mouth, as DS doesn't with his thumb, but I won't mind when she's having quiet time at home.

I had a dummy until I was 7, never took it anywhere but just had it for bed.

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Feb 14th, 2012, 19:56 PM
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My LO is almost 20 months & still has a bottle for naptime & bedtime. She also has a 'sucky'.
I don't plan to make her give up either until she's good & ready and personally would be incredibly annoyed if i had someone else interfering with how i choose to deal with this subject.
So personally, i wouldn't advise you to get involved, sorry.

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Feb 14th, 2012, 22:08 PM
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Nowadays, I think anyone will tell you that bottles should go after age two, and they're probably right.

BUT -- I do have to add -- that when I was a child, I still took a bottle at age 4. I don't know why, and my mother has passed away, so I can't ask her why. But I always had one before bed, and I can honestly say it didn't hurt me. My teeth are fine! Never had a cavity in my life, in fact. I remember my mother saying that now that I was turning FIVE, it was time to be a big girl and not have a bottle. I wonder from that vague memory how long she'd been trying to get me to give it up. I'm not sure. But I did give it up around my 5th birthday. And no harm done!

So just throwing that out there! I'm sure it's better not to have the bottle at that age -- but it's not the crime of the century, either. I wonder if it wasn't a little more common back when I was little. I'm not sure.

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Feb 14th, 2012, 22:20 PM
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Personally I see no reason why the dummy and bottle can't be gone by 2.my kids didn't have dummy's but my daughter weaned off bottles at 15 months cos we left her bottles at my dads and that was that.by two she was well and truly old enough to understand it was time for things to go ect.bottles and dummy's are really bad for teeth an speech development

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Feb 14th, 2012, 23:42 PM
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My DS is 3, he sucks his thumb which we can't take away. He still has milk at bedtime in a sippy cup appropriate to his age. I can't get him to drink out of a normal cup without massive spillage everywhere.

I think if its a normal bottle then it should be changed. Its hard though if that child is happy in the routine.

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