Don't know what to suggest hun but I'm sorry you are feeling so stressed. Sam has been having some pretty mighty tantrums at the moment - luckily they aren't too frequent and are directly related to not napping every day anymore.
I ignore him completely for as long as I can and if it goes on for 45 mins - 1 hour or more then I will end up having to tell him to calm down and stop. what's worked to get him to stop is I tell him he won't get bed time stories (he LOVES his bedtime stories - I do make it clear though he can have stories down stairs at any other part of the day as I don't want to stop him from looking at books were he to be a nightmare all the time!)
Because he knows he's going to miss out on something he loves it does go some way to calming him down.
I also find that after his tantrums he actually tells me he is sorry (without me prompting) and I think this is directly as the odd time I have lost my temper with him I have actually apologised to him for shouting at him as I don't like doing it and I think it's taught him that it's not good to shout really (either mommy or him!)
I also agree that if his speech isn't quite on the level of his thoughts and intelligence, he might be getting frustrated. Annoyingly with the most difficult stages it's often only time that really solves these issues.
Try and take time out for yourself if you possibly can (I understand this isn't easy with 2!) xx
Thanks for explaining it in such a fantastic eye opening manner hattiehippo! I know little ones always act up the moment their parents arrive, but have never thought of it that way. Seeing it this way has now actually just made me more understanding of his actions.
Moomoo, he definitely does not hate you. He needs someone to 'tell/show' his life frustrations to.
You have a very important point jojo2605, I also try to say I'm sorry if I've lost it and shouted at him. Now it is getting to a point where sometimes if I ask him to do something, he'll shout at me 'no I don't want to', all I have to do is get up or give him the evil eye, then he realises what he's done and quickly comes up to me, rubs my leg and says 'sorry'. (little nonsense knows by now that it will defuse the situation immediately)
I'm getting into the terrible 2s with my DS. He throws huge tantrums multiple times a day. He would kick and scream on the floor, kick off his shoes, push me and hit me. I also feel at times at my wits end. He has a twin sister who rarely throws tantrums and very easy going (thank goodness!). I've been trying to keep in front of his tantrums by distracting him with other things. That has helped a little bit. Just tonight he didn't want to get out of the bath. So it was a half hour fight before he calmed down. This morning he didn't want to put on his shoes, his jacket, eat his breakfast, get into the car or go to daycare. You name it, he doesn't want to do it. I also lost it today and yelled at him. I know it doesn't help the situation but I'm so stressed about this because I don't know how to handle it.
i use time out for my LO. I stand her out in the lobby because if she is in sight of anyone then they escalate 10x worse. Personally I am not for any type of hitting because in my mind all it deomstrates to them is that if somebody does not do what they want, then they equally have the right to hit back to somebody else. Even if an adult does do slaps in a controlled manner (which is hard because often emotion and anger is inbuilt into the reaction of hitting) then a toddler will not understand that there is any control. A few times I have tapped my child across the knuckles in instinct of them touching something hot or something, and all it has meant is that a bit later they have then tried hitting me back or hitting somebody else because in their eyes 'when I didn't do what you wanted you hit me, so when sombody else doesn't do as I want then I can hit them.'
We have found standing them in a safe enclosed room for a minute or 2 is sufficient to get them to recognise that what they're doing isnt stood for and often the threat of 'being stood out there if you carry on' is sufficint now because they obviously don't want to stand in a room by themselves.
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