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Old Oct 7th, 2012, 00:02 AM   21
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to my mother:

STOP! STOP! STOP telling me that i dont need a baby right now! STOP telling me to wait to have kids! STOP acting like having a baby is the worst most tragic life ruining thing that could ever happen to me. I am happily married, and financially stable and i dont ask you for a damn thing, so please tell me how you've come to the conclusion that you even have a say in this matter? and for the love of GOD, when people ask ME about MY plans to have kids STOP butting in and cutting me off saying "Shes waiting at least five years for that," because i dont know where the hell you heard that insane idea, and then you have the nerve to add insult to injury by turning to me and saying "Right?" in that annoying uppity fake voice you put on whenever we're around people you feel the need to impress. Because while i might mumble around and change the subject or give some half ass beauty pageant answer at the moment, what i really want to say is "NO! NOT RIGHT! and since everybody feels the need to put my reproductive system in spotlight how about this- i have PCOS and might not be able to have these 'children' of which you speak. so as a matter of fact I AM trying to get pregnant right now, to no avail by the way. and it kills me everyday that my body cant perform the one task it was actually made to do! and ignorant buttholes like you dont make it any easier with your rude questions and assumptions!!"

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Old Oct 7th, 2012, 00:42 AM   22
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Ok my rant to my husbands Grand Mother:

You need to stop interfering in other peoples lives. You may hate me and you may think I'm not good enough to marry your grandson (Which you have told me) you may also think i only married your grandson for his money and a nice engagement ring... But here is the thing you nosey bitch.. I married your grandson because i love him and WILL spend the rest of my life with him...

You grandson thinks I'm good enough and if you were any sort of grandmother you would accept that. We don't have to be best friends and quite frankly if i never saw you again it would be all to soon.

yes you don't want us to have children together but again thats not ur decision...

I have done all i can to keep you happy but enuf is enuf and now you have managed to push him away that is my fault as well.. sorry but you have done this all on your own and now you get to sleep in the bed you made...

People will only take so much of your two faced bitchiness and bullshit that you have been feeding before you end up completely alone.. you will have no one to blame but urself..

Sorry ladies it was either on here or to her face and i think she already wants a reason to tell everyone she told them so.. so I'm venting in the perfect place even though its not really tic she is putting so much stress on us...

i just want to be pregnant and happy and I'm 3DPO and NO SYMPTOMS what so ever so I'm emotional...

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Old Oct 8th, 2012, 19:43 PM   23
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I am so tired of ttc. I'm driving my dh crazy because I'm obsessive about this subject. I know that he hopes too, but six years and I'm still holding it together 90% of the time without complaint! Come on, I'm allowed to cry and whine sometimes, aren't I? And don't get me started on family members who complain about their success taking 3-6 months. In my family, only my niece and i have the right to complain about the problems of infertility, both had a couple of mc. I am happy for her most out of my three pregnant family members because if that, but even so, she started ttc about six months before the twins stuck. Here I am pretending it doesn't bother me to only break down when I'm alone. Does anyone else ever feel like this? I would really like to not have my first thought about a pregnant woman be hate her.'

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Old Oct 9th, 2012, 06:39 AM   24
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anime ^^ we all feel like that at times hun

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Old Oct 9th, 2012, 08:27 AM   25
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Nic - yes we do. Only those going through infertility know of our sacrifices, both emotionally and financially. I was a runner and when I started with infertility treatment, I had to take it easy with the bloated ovaries. Now, I run less and have to accept a slower finish race time. After what seemed to be a million negative pregnancy tests, I enrolled myself into a masters program just to see some A+. I have a 3.85/4.0 GPA.

I hope you ladies have support and other ways to keep you sane and feel productive.

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Old Oct 9th, 2012, 14:49 PM   26
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ooh have I got a rant!

To my future SIL
I'm so sick of hearing about how happy you are about being pregnant. I told you at the beginning of our friendship that I couldn't concieve and it kills me. But then you went off and purposely got pregnant at the first sign that I said I wanted a baby. THEN you sent me picture after picture of your positive preg tests! WTF is wrong with you!?
On top of all that, stop asking me to help decorate your baby's room, or set up the baby shower, or hold your hand in the labor ward. I wish I could be there as a friend but you aren't there as a friend for me in my time of need and all you are doing is setting me off. Being infertile is a HORRIBLE thing to go through that you will NEVER understand. I love you, and your family, and especially your amazing brother, but I vow that I will not stand by and watch you shove your baby in my face any longer. I am tired of feeling hurt on top of everything else I feel.
Also, Your babydaddy/bf/fiancee is a total loser. I hope once your son is here you see he isn't here for the long run and he's only keeping you around because you practically wipe his a*s.

To All my friends IRL
Stop telling me to be patient. I have been patient for four years. I'm happy that all you have to do is spread your legs and get pregnant and I wish so very much it was that easy for me. But its not, and you telling me that everything is fine and its no big deal is making it so much worse and so much harder to trust you and confide in you. Especially my friend K, I love you to pieces. But ever since your nephew was born you have thrown pictures and videos and stories in my face reguardless of how many times I showed up on your porch crying my eyes out over a BFN. I just wish you would all be more sensitive. This pain I feel is unlike anything I have ever felt before, and I couldn't ask you to understand it. But I should at the very least have a friend of the many of you that would be supportive.
Instead I am completely alone in this. No one has been a support. My mom lives a day away and she was the closest thing I had to family. I am alone. My SO has been great--but he doesn't quite see it in a womans point of view. So thank you for leaving me in the dust; this is why I haven't come to visit in weeks.
-end rant

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Old Oct 9th, 2012, 18:51 PM   27
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oohh i have a good one..

To people in work.. if we are just having a general conversation and i say oh im feeling abit run down today or feel sick because i havnt eaten breakfast yet will you please stop asking me if i am pregnant!!! and telling me thats how u feel with ur first!

pffft get out my face.. and if i was pregnant why would i tell you!!

ahhh feel abit better after that! lol

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Old Oct 9th, 2012, 20:16 PM   28
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Saw a 14 year old showing off her scan pics on the bus today. Made me horrendously sad. When is it my turn? Why are babies having babies yet I can't?

All my TTC buddies on another site have left me behind now that they've got their BFPs. They keep telling me to chill out and it will happen - but I remember what THEy were like in 2ww And it was not chilled out at all. Hate it that sometimes ladies who get their bfp for over what it feels like to TTC.

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Old Oct 9th, 2012, 20:21 PM   29
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Originally Posted by laurac1988 View Post
Saw a 14 year old showing off her scan pics on the bus today. Made me horrendously sad. When is it my turn? Why are babies having babies yet I can't?

All my TTC buddies on another site have left me behind now that they've got their BFPs. They keep telling me to chill out and it will happen - but I remember what THEy were like in 2ww And it was not chilled out at all. Hate it that sometimes ladies who get their bfp for over what it feels like to TTC.
That must be so frustrating with those other ladies. You've got us still.
I promised myself that I won't gloat or be obnoxious if we ever get a bfp. A dear friend has been TTC for 8 years so I know now only a fraction of her frustration. 10 months and 11 cycles later.
Hang in there girl we'll get to be mothers in some way....someday.

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Old Oct 10th, 2012, 01:39 AM   30
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okay here we go...

To my friends IRL~

Please stop constantly asking if I'm pregnant yet. It hurts so badly everytime I have to say "no". Please stop sending me articles about how to make my own baby food and asking what colors I would like the baby blanket to be that you are going to crochet for me. It hurts so badly to think I will have a little blanket but no baby to put into it. If I saw you two days ago and said I wasn't pregnant--guess what? More than likely, I'm still not today and I wish you would notice the tears in my eyes or how I don't talk about it anymore because it just hurts. Please stop giving me advice or telling me you have a book I need to read. Just Stop. I don't even want to hang out with you anymore because you're making me feel worse. I just want to hide under a rock until I know for sure I'm pregnant. Then maybe we can hang out again.

To my mom~

If I was pregnant, you know I'd tell you by now so why do you keep asking? And the last thing I want to hear from my mom is positions and techniques I should try. Can you just respect our privacy a little? I don't want to talk about those kind of details with you even though you think it's so cool and modern how you talk about sex to anyone and everyone. It's inappropriate so just stop. Stop telling me things I already know. You do know I'm educated, right? And things have changed a bit since you were last ttc.

And just in general~

I hate that I envy pregnant women. I hate that when my friends announce pregnancies it stabs me in the heart. I can be happy but in an odd way. They tell me to be patient but the thing is you all have at least ONE kid. How can you guys tell me not to worry when at least you know that you always at least have had the experience of that one child (sometimes two, three , or four). Of course it's no big deal to you. Yet here I am, never been pregnant. Never once saw that second line. How can I even know if it's possible? What if it's not and all of this is a huge waste of time?..It's easy for you to be blase' and say I have all the time in the world...but what if you were in my shoes?
Why do I even bother buying these tests..I never see a damn thing on them. Am I being punished?

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