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Old Aug 12th, 2016, 02:55 AM   41
Aphy
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With work its always complicated when ttc. My colleagues all knew we were trying and after 8 months after I had already made an appointment to see my gynae cause I noticed my cycles were getting irregular, my other colleague found out she was pregnant (she had undergone foot surgery and taken hectic pain meds etc before she knew she was pregnant so unfortunately it ended in a mc) but now everyone thinks I went to gynae only because she got pregnant. They were obviously all asking me what gynae said afterwards and I dont want to lie to them so I told them about the pcos and Clomid etc but now I sit with the worry of what do I do when I eventually get my BFP! I dont want to tell everyone before 12 weeks (I saw how it affected my colleague) but at the same time I can't avoid it cause I have to tell my boss in order to get the 1 day a month pregnancy check up benefit. So frustrating!

Sarah, does it feel like they will look at you or treat you differently if they knew?



 
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Old Aug 12th, 2016, 03:49 AM   42
sarah2211
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Aphy, it sounds like you and your colleagues are very close to be sharing that information with each other. It must be difficult, especially since they know so much and may even guess.

I feel like sharing your infertility and sharing about a MC is similar though. It's both private information. To be honest, I've found it easier talking about the MC. But it would be entirely up to you whether you told them before 12 weeks of course!


I've only been in my job since March. Like I said, before me they don't like change, their team was unchanged for 6 years. I know they expect that I'll fall pregnant and may not return after that, but I think they expect that to happen in 12-24 months time. I know if they knew we were trying when I applied for the job, I probably wouldn't have been given it. Some teaching teams aren't so worried about change, but I know for these teachers, they would be really annoyed. But I am not letting that stop me from trying, obviously. But I don't want to advertise it and have them feel this way towards me before we're even pregnant!



 
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Old Aug 12th, 2016, 08:57 AM   43
ILoveme29
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@Sarah when i had my MC and it was confirmed i was trying not to cry. as soon as i left out to the parking lot me and DH just broke down in tears. I really don't wish that feeling on anyone. was absolutely the saddest day of my life. I understand what your saying when it comes to work.

@Aphy wow, ppl always assume things. ive never cared to share my personal info to my colleagues. only my closest one and my boss because she knows. and she understands my situation (im in nursing). ppl will know when they see my belly lol.



 
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Old Aug 12th, 2016, 12:57 PM   44
Aphy
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We are a bunch of psychologists so we are kind of expected to be open about things in our department 😖 Unfortunately we have one colleague who is in the bosses pocket so if I tell him,he will definitely tell her and then the whole department would know no matter what I want. *sigh* work politics!

I am so sorry for the mc you have had to go through!



 
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Old Aug 12th, 2016, 13:27 PM   45
ILoveme29
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I have question ladies, today makes CD3 for me, my AF is still very light, just enough for a panty liner. ive had this before but im so used to it coming full flow by now. idk if that's normal. im happy that it showed but barley



 
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Old Aug 12th, 2016, 14:28 PM   46
sarah2211
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Iloveme, I agree, I don't think I've cried as much as I did about the MC for a very very long time. We had a lot of hopes pinned on that. The length of time we'd been trying, plus being able to get pregnant without needing to see a specialist (which is the next step now). Plus the feeling like its pushed you back further from the finish line.

Aphy, that makes a lot of sense about being psychologists, but you're still entitled to privacy. Haha yes work politics.


Iloveme, I commented on the other post about your light AF. Mine is like that too. Sometimes it slows down or stops for a day and then starts again. My AF before the MC was really really light, just spotting for a few days. I asked about it and was told 2 things, spotting isn't AF take a pregnancy test (BFN) or a thin endometrium lining (I think). one off might be ok, but if it happens again ask your doctor.



 
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Old Aug 13th, 2016, 09:06 AM   47
ILoveme29
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@Sarah yes and then some months its very long lasting and quite heavy. I did read your post on the other board and thank you. I read about it being endometria as well or something of the sort, but nothing to do with endometriosis thankfully.

CD4 for me AF is a little heavier, and im having a lot of pressure and cramps



 
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Old Aug 15th, 2016, 02:14 AM   48
sarah2211
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Hope AF isn't been too harsh on you iloveme.

13DPO here. I did a cheapie this afternoon and it was a BFN. I'm getting some cramping (which I never get) so I'm predicting AF will be here in the next few days I know you're not out until you're out, but I just feel it.



 
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Old Aug 15th, 2016, 07:44 AM   49
DeuceMom
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Old Aug 15th, 2016, 08:41 AM   50
ILoveme29
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@sarah not at all in fact its completely gone, I don't know if I can even call that having AF . Im sorry to hear about BFN, cramping can be a good sign as well so fx for you.

@Deucemon thanks for the advice. my cramping has eased up thankfully.

I still have not started temping. I guess I will get opk test strips I can never keep up with it.



 
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