Forum Rules


Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old May 3rd, 2012, 11:14 AM   11
sweetmere
Mum (Mom)
Chat Happy BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2011
Posts: 1,675
Hey all - thank you for commenting. I'm trying to be positive because like I said in another post, God is looking out for me...he knows what I want, but he also knows what I need. The timing isn't right. None of us know why, but the timing isn't right and we have to wait until it is.

I still stand by what I say, though...I don't *understand* why some people conceive on accident at 14 years old, and others conceive first try. I don't understand. But I can't control it.

"Of course I'm not pregnant"...that's about how I feel every single month. The first month I really thought it would happen the first try. I honestly think I may have had a chemical pregnancy that month...my temps went higher than ever, I had a lot of symptoms too. Looking at my charts that one definitely sticks out. But I'll never know for sure.

We're going on month 5. It sucks...but like I said, I'm trying to come to terms with it. We're going to keep trying, but I'm going to really try not to chart, not to take my bbt, etc. What sucks is I bought this stupid preseed and the tube is half gone. & it didn't work!!! Waste of money, I tell you!!!

"Don't you just wish that for once someone would answer with a "poor you, that really sucks" as opposed to a "chill out"? SO ANNOYING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
this^^ is exactly what I would just love to shout from the rooftops. What is so wrong about us getting some sympathy? Instead, to the VERY FEW people I've talked to about, most of them seem to get an annoyed look as if I'm stupid for thinking TTC is hurtful/stressful/etcetera and they're like "just relax and stop trying so hard" or "it'll happen when you least expect it" or better yet "it'll happen when you don't think you're pregnant that month" oh you think I don't know deep down I'm not pregnant? Yeah, I still symptom spot and try to WISH that I'm pregnant, but every month deep down, I know I'm not pregnant. And *obviously* that has not worked. I just want to yell at people and say "WE DON'T ALL GET PREGNANT ON THE FIRST TRY LIKE MOST OF YOU SUCKERS". I keep hearing the "hardly anyone gets pregnant right away" but I will roll my eyes at that statement...almost every single person I know got pregnant on accident or the first try. I was an accident and my brother was the first try for my mom, and she had 2 miscarriages that were accidents. My good friend got pregnant 1st try and my other friend had 2 accidents. Another friend, it was an accident. And yet another friend, accident. Another married couple we know- 2nd month. Everyone I know on facebook says "it was just an accident! oopsie!" THE only person I know personally that didn't conceive right away, it took her years because they had infertility issues. I'm sure there are more, but for the most part, it happens straight away and I'm sticking to that.

I honestly don't know how people do it. How can it ever be an accident? I don't even know why I was ever using protection. I honestly don't think it would have happened anyway. I'm obviously not an "accident" kind of person!!! Since I WAS an accident, being here, maybe that's my punishment, maybe I can't conceive because I'm a stupid accident.

I also want to add that I was probably in the minority here, I'm not sure, but I joined Instagram because I was a member of The Bump app and we all talked in Instagram. The first month I started trying (and I was the youngest) I was on there with 4 other girls and it was their first month. 3 of them conceived that first month, the other one, the 2nd. I'm on my 5th. That...that hurts...



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 3rd, 2012, 14:00 PM   12
drsquid
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,591
I only made it to 4 months before I gave up and switched to ivf. At least you guys aren't getting, have you considered adoption.



Status: Offline
 
Old May 3rd, 2012, 14:26 PM   13
ashleylu88
Trying to conceive (TTC)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Georgia
Posts: 449
I'm not trying to be rude, but I hate when people ask me about adoption. I wouldn't adopt unless I knew for a FACT that I could NOT have a baby. I want a baby of my own, that is made from me and my husband. Now if it came down to it and I couldn't have a baby at all, have had surgeries, tests ect then yes I would consider adoption. BUT we have only been trying for 5 months, so has sweetmere, and no 5 months isn't that long but it feels like forever for us. I know people that tried for over a year, some 3 years, one lady tried for 6 years. But she never gave up and finally got her BFP.

Sorry I am not trying to be rude. I have had a tough time with ttc and its getting the best of me. Adoption is great for people that CAN NOT for a fact have a baby, but if not then its to soon to ask someone who has only been trying for 5 months if they would consider adoption. Like there are tons of things I can do and sweetmere can do before we even think about that.

Again nothing directed toward you. I get asked that all the time and it's starting to get to me. : /



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 3rd, 2012, 14:53 PM   14
Asters
Pregnant (Expecting)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: essex
Posts: 927
After feeling better for venting frustrations, got another bfn today and when i was disappointed and talking to my OH about it he said (first he said these things take time) im being childish and impatient and my reaction is seriously over the top! Nice! Glad to know were singing off the same hymn sheet! Dont think hes bothered at all! Was hopeful this month, had a few symptoms i thought were promising! gutted! jus want him to give me a hug not a telling off! xxx



Status: Offline
 
Old May 3rd, 2012, 16:28 PM   15
munchkinlove
Pregnant (Expecting)
Chat Happy BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2011
Location: Central New York
Posts: 1,271
im with you all!!!!!!!!! we are on our 3rd month of ttc and we NTNP for 3 months before then and nothing. everyone around me is pregnant, my sister whom is 20 first try now complains constantly she cant get comfortable to sleep!!!!!!!!!! a girl at work first try, first night!!!!!!!!! i always get the JUST RELAX...yeah ok easier said then done or the just stop trying and itll happen....quite frustrating!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i try not to let it get to me some days are better then others.......good luck everyone, i hope we all get those bfps soon!!!!!!



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 3rd, 2012, 17:05 PM   16
drsquid
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Posts: 3,591
Ashley- you got me wrong. I'm saying that that is what I get all the time cause im single etc. most people seem to be hearing if you just relax it'll happen (which clearly they can't say to me cause being single nothing will happen). So mostly I get that in selfish for spending money on trying to conceive. And of course my huge pet peeve, the adoption question. I'm not sure why I'm supposed to not want my own child just
Cause I don't have a husband.



Status: Offline
 
Old May 3rd, 2012, 22:08 PM   17
Helena_
Pregnant (Expecting)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: San Diego
Posts: 3,876
I had a friend tell me that she wishes she could give me her uterus. When I said my uterus is fine, it's my hormones that aren't she said, ”so your a guy”. She was joking, but didn't realize how much that hurt considering that, yes I have a higher level of testosterone than I should. I hate people



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 4th, 2012, 06:06 AM   18
Nicola27
Mum (Mom)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Manchester, UK
Posts: 313
Quote:
Originally Posted by drsquid View Post
Ashley- you got me wrong. I'm saying that that is what I get all the time cause im single etc. most people seem to be hearing if you just relax it'll happen (which clearly they can't say to me cause being single nothing will happen). So mostly I get that in selfish for spending money on trying to conceive. And of course my huge pet peeve, the adoption question. I'm not sure why I'm supposed to not want my own child just
Cause I don't have a husband.
ohhh, i totally read your post the wrong way first time as well! oops
xx



Status: Offline
 
Old May 5th, 2012, 17:23 PM   19
ashleylu88
Trying to conceive (TTC)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Georgia
Posts: 449
Quote:
Originally Posted by drsquid View Post
Ashley- you got me wrong. I'm saying that that is what I get all the time cause im single etc. most people seem to be hearing if you just relax it'll happen (which clearly they can't say to me cause being single nothing will happen). So mostly I get that in selfish for spending money on trying to conceive. And of course my huge pet peeve, the adoption question. I'm not sure why I'm supposed to not want my own child just
Cause I don't have a husband.
I re-read it and I'm so sorry I did read it completely wrong the first time! I HATE that question too! I think to myself like really? We haven't been ttc forever, we just started. it feels like forever but it isn't.

You have every right to want a baby of your on, single or not. What woman doesn't want her own child? Have you ever seen that movie with Jenifer Lopez where she is single and wants a baby, she gets ivf and then she meets a man and falls in love. The name of the movie is "Back-up plan" you will LOVE it!



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 5th, 2012, 18:13 PM   20
Jeni82
Mum (Mom)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Toronto
Posts: 135
Sweetmere - it felt like you took the words right out of my mouth. It takes so much restraint for me not to post those exact feelings on facebook or in writing to friends and family.

My good friend who I also work 5 days a week with (side by side) was ttc baby#2 and when her af came on her first month had a complete melt down. She then conceived on her second month. I've been ttc since before that and was 6 months in when I confided in her about my struggle and she turned to me and said (with her belly bump), its nothing to be upset about. I lost it and reminded her of how she reacted when it didn't happen for her on her first try. She then proceeded to tell me that our situations were different since I didn't start trying right after I was married and she did. What a wedding has to do with getting pregnant I have no friggin idea. It took all of my strength not to lash out.

Every day I get to go to work and listen to her and all the other girls talk about how the best feeling in the world is a baby in your belly. (they all know my struggle). Plus I was nice enough to throw her a baby shower last saturday. I'm such a push over! And if I have to listen to another person telling me I can have their egg or that I should adopt I might just lose it. My one friend keeps suggesting it and I finally lost it when she said that a baby is a baby. I turned to her and said "doesn't surprise me, coming from someone who has 2 biological kids of her own". Plus her and her husband aborted baby #3.

I have 2 younger sisters. Sister number 1 has had 3 ooopsies. One when she was 16, then 23 and finally 27. Sister number 2 had one ooopsie at 26. I just don't get it!!!!!!! I've been trying for over a year and nothing, not one BFP.


Thanks for letting me rant with you!

I also agree with another post here. I was referred to a FS, not because of the length of time I was TTC but because of the emotional toll it was taking on me. It wouldn't hurt to have a work up done to make sure everything is in good shape. I ended up finding out I have a great egg reserve because I never release any and my tubes are free and clear of obstruction. They also found I have a tyroid issue and that my husband has low motility. It may help to put your mind at ease instead just a little bit.

Best of Luck!



 
Status: Offline
 

SEO by vBSEO