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Old Jun 28th, 2018, 07:34 AM   9011
Wish2BMom
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a granddaughter?? lovely! congrats, ttc!



 
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Old Jul 1st, 2018, 01:48 AM   9012
Vedika
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I am Vedika from UK. I have been trying to conceive past 2 months now. I seem difficult at times.



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Old Jul 1st, 2018, 11:07 AM   9013
terripeachy
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Congrats TTC!!

Wicky-hopefully it'll be a smidge cooler when you get here. The last few days have been almost unbearable. 97 today! Have a great and safe trip.



 
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Old Jul 8th, 2018, 13:18 PM   9014
mikihope
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Spud- I’m sorry AF arrived, I was quite excited for you. I hope that you’re having a wonderful time in England. Seren sounds adorable!

Wish- Your boys sound really wonderful and hilarious! They’re at a really cute age now Gummy also does the flirting thing... a lot! Poor M, I hope his cough clears up soon. What a trooper!

Wicky- Well, my trip was never relaxing as we had to spend loads of time with relatives in both countries. But it was great fun! Aw... M is a little peanut! I’m relieved to hear that you’re starting to feel like yourself again, and that your PPD is getting better. Glad to hear that DW is being so great, and I hope that her support helps you get over the bf challenges you’re facing. How was your first day back at work?

We got back 3 days ago from our monster month-long trip to our home countries, and gummy has been kind of fussy. I can’t tell if it’s jet lag or teething. He’s now extremely wriggly and distracted when feeding, and he’s trying hard to crawl. He pops up on all fours and rocks back and forth, then tries to launch himself forward. It doesn’t quite work. Right now, he can only worm forward by smashing his head on the floor, butt in air. He’s a raspberry-blowing champ now, and more vocal than ever. I can’t help but feel a bit sad that he’s growing up so fast.

Gummy had to adapt to a lot things on this trip. He had to drink different formula in both countries. I hated the Singapore (tropical) version of Enfamil, it was so ridiculously hard to dissolve. He had to sleep in different cribs and all sorts of different situations. He had to go to many gatherings and was constantly passed around from relative to relative. Everyone said that he was a very happy and mellow baby. He was really well-behaved in general, but he did get super fussy at the 2nd wedding ceremony (a beautiful one at the beach). He’d only 1 hour of sleep all day. The wedding started at 4pm, and gummy was doing well until it was around 9pm, when he started making a big fuss during dinner. He was a well-behaved baby the rest of the time, so we went out with him a ton during our trip and didn’t have to change any plans. The flight back home was hard on me as I basically had him on my lap for the entire 16 hours. He’s become so wriggly of late, it wasn’t easy keeping him there.

Gummy had his toes dipped in the ocean in Mauritius, and he was immersed up to his neck in my folk’s pool in Singapore. He was happily kicking the water. It was sad leaving our home countries, and leaving his grandparents behind. We live so far away from them, it will be ages before they see him again.

One thing that struck me while I was on this trip was that my side of the family was not genetically related to gummy. Nobody knows he was conceived by donor egg except our parents and my sister. I felt like I was a fraud and I was letting them down. Also, I felt awkward when people kept saying that he is the perfect mix of DH and I. We hear this a lot, actually. I think it looks that way because we are of different ethnicities, and gummy looks like a mix of those two. Many people congratulated us on how cute/handsome he is, and I did feel a twinge and thought, "That’s not from my genes"ÄĚ. I never think of these things unless people bring it up, but I guess I need to get used to hearing these things. Gummy is the light of my life, and it saddens me that I feel so awkward at these well-meaning comments.



 
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Old Jul 8th, 2018, 17:12 PM   9015
TTC74
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Miki - have you considered getting some counseling to deal with all these feelings you have? I know that you love gummy to pieces but you shouldn’t have to deal with the challenges of these feelings that you’re being deceptive. Not revealing private health information is not deceptive! It’s perfectly ordinary.

AFM - pos OPK today. Thank heavens! The stress pushed my O back pretty late last month. I thought my body was going nuts!



 
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Old Jul 9th, 2018, 06:53 AM   9016
Wish2BMom
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miki - I can relate SO MUCH to what you're saying and feeling. I feel fraudulent too and I hate it. I just want to shout it as a confession sometimes. Especially when people are looking at the boys and going 'what do they have of yours? I see DH but...'. Like they're on to me or something! Or even when they say something like 'Malcolm is spitting image of you' - no, he's not. But thank you.
However, I have allowed myself to sometimes say stuff about characteristics they might have of mine - M likes to sleep on his side, T is very social and both have 'crazy pants' like Mama. Things that wouldn't be genetic, per se, but they'd pick up from me and my character. And then I'll say stuff like 'Mama had chubby cheeks as a baby too!' which isn't a lie - I did. He just didn't get them from me. It makes me so sad and I don't think I'll ever get completely over it but I have them in my life b/c of this glorious, generous person that one day decided to do some stranger a solid.
I don't know if this helps or more points out that I might need to talk to someone too!

Go TTC! You're so tenacious in your baby-making!



 
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Old Jul 11th, 2018, 14:38 PM   9017
TTC74
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Forget what I said. I like Wishís answer better!

Bonus! She actually has experience with this!



 
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Old Jul 12th, 2018, 07:02 AM   9018
Wish2BMom
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I liked your answer too, TTC! We shouldn't feel that we have to disclose any medical history to anyone unless necessary. It's just not a typical 'old fashioned' way of making a baby. Not even more common 'new' fashion of JUST ivf! We're in a whole new realm to most of society!



 
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Old Jul 12th, 2018, 18:38 PM   9019
mikihope
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TTC- I liked your answer too! I should remind myself that itís not deceptive to withhold private health information! Thanks for your concern, I think Iíll talk to someone if it continues or becomes worse. I donít feel bad when those things happen, just awkward, like I canít thank them because itís not true. So many people have told us in a heartfelt manner, ďHeís such a perfect mix of the two of you.Ē I'm very honest, so I can't even bring myself to thank them, but instead I just smile and say nothing. I feel like Iím letting them down, and hiding something! DH and I decided early on that we would let people know if they asked, or if it came up, so maybe it will be easier as time goes on.

Wish- Iím sorry you have all those feelings too. I do feel weird when people make comments about who he looks like. Strangely, people keep seeing my features in gummy. The only person who keeps saying loudly that he looks exactly like DH is my mom I like how youíre talking about M and T's characteristics which they could have picked up from you. Thatís a great idea, I should do that!

I think that going back to both home countries was a big exercise in dealing with these things, as hordes of relatives were meeting gummy for the first time. Maybe things will be easier from now on. I forgot, I did tell my cousin and her mom as they mentioned my (advanced) age. And I told the daycare lady early on. They all reacted very well, and I was glad I told them.

We're all slowly getting over fatigue from the trip and massive jet lag, and things are starting to return to normal. I hope everyone is doing well!



 
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Old Jul 13th, 2018, 08:00 AM   9020
Wish2BMom
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oh man, I get jetlag just going to Vegas! I can't imagine being halfway around the world!!



 
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