TTC first time and 39

gustav72 · Mar 26th, 2012, 14:36 PM

Hi All, I'm new to these boards and looking for some support. I originally posted this in the TTC board, but thought this board might be more appropriate due to my age. I am turning 40 in November and my husband is 43. We've been trying to conceive since December. I've been doing ovulation sticks the past two months and BBT the past month. I didn't realize how much the pressure of TTC would put on us, this past month didn't go so well with the TTC sex as we were both stressed and it affected the process. I guess I didn't think the pressure of our ages would get to us so much. All of our friends have kids and we are the last ones to try. We both really want a child and I think we are getting into our heads way too much...any words of wisdom? I could really use it, as I don't feel like I can talk to even my close friends about my feelings. Thanks!

SaraJewel · Mar 26th, 2012, 14:56 PM

I agree, and a lot of what you have said sounds very familiar!

We felt under a lot of pressure when we started ttc 7 months ago, this led to serious perfomance problems for my OH. Maybe the best thing to do is take the pressure off for a few months, maybe even stop using Ovulations sticks/BBT and just make sure you BD regularly.

I think we are just starting to get back to normal now, although I do sometimes still feel stressed by the whole situation. We don't talk about ttc anymore in any particular detail as have found that just puts more stress on the situation.

The more stressed I got, the more stressed my OH got and the worse our sex life became!

I don't know if this helps, but just to let you know, I know how you feel. Good luck x

gustav72 · Mar 26th, 2012, 15:01 PM

Thanks for the advice, it helps. The performance issue just came up this month and we both feel really stressed by it. All the best as well and thanks again. The validation helps.
P.S. I need to figure out what all the abbreviations mean in people's posts! lol

SaraJewel · Mar 26th, 2012, 15:05 PM

Check out the forum help area of the board: has a big long list of abbreviations!

I know, it can feel a bit lonely when you can't really discuss it with friends as sometimes that can put even more pressure on!

heavenly · Mar 26th, 2012, 15:27 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gustav72

Hi All, I'm new to these boards and looking for some support. I originally posted this in the TTC board, but thought this board might be more appropriate due to my age. I am turning 40 in November and my husband is 43. We've been trying to conceive since December. I've been doing ovulation sticks the past two months and BBT the past month. I didn't realize how much the pressure of TTC would put on us, this past month didn't go so well with the TTC sex as we were both stressed and it affected the process. I guess I didn't think the pressure of our ages would get to us so much. All of our friends have kids and we are the last ones to try. We both really want a child and I think we are getting into our heads way too much...any words of wisdom? I could really use it, as I don't feel like I can talk to even my close friends about my feelings. Thanks!

Hi there.

You will find loads of support on here. Hope you will join us in this thread.

http://www.babyandbump.com/ttc-group...downs-533.html

I do understand, I am 46 and we have been trying for 4 years. Everyone I know has children, including both my sisters. We have had to go private and have consultations and tests etc, but it has armed us with more information about what plan of action to follow.

Do keep posting. xx

gustav72 · Mar 26th, 2012, 19:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by SaraJewel

Check out the forum help area of the board: has a big long list of abbreviations!

I know, it can feel a bit lonely when you can't really discuss it with friends as sometimes that can put even more pressure on!

Thanks SaraJewel I found the abbreviation list...that helps!

vermeil · Apr 1st, 2012, 22:43 PM

yeah... the whole TTC 'adventure' can seriously make you go a little

Everyone says 'don`t think about it! don`t sress!' yeah right, pretty much impossible

Kismet · Apr 2nd, 2012, 15:08 PM

I'm 38 (39 in November) and my husband is 41. We're planning to start TTC in the summer. One thing I read was to BD regularly (every 2-3 days) and not worry about it otherwise. Of course, when you're younger, that's much easier to do!

I know what you mean about not feeling able to talk to friends. My DH and I are keeping this very quiet because we don't want the pressure. Of course, that also means we don't get the support, either. That makes me sad, but finding places like this has helped a lot. I hope it helps you as well.

Mar 26th, 2012, 14:36 PM	#1
gustav72 Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Posts: 109	TTC first time and 39 Hi All, I'm new to these boards and looking for some support. I originally posted this in the TTC board, but thought this board might be more appropriate due to my age. I am turning 40 in November and my husband is 43. We've been trying to conceive since December. I've been doing ovulation sticks the past two months and BBT the past month. I didn't realize how much the pressure of TTC would put on us, this past month didn't go so well with the TTC sex as we were both stressed and it affected the process. I guess I didn't think the pressure of our ages would get to us so much. All of our friends have kids and we are the last ones to try. We both really want a child and I think we are getting into our heads way too much...any words of wisdom? I could really use it, as I don't feel like I can talk to even my close friends about my feelings. Thanks!

Status: Offline

Mar 26th, 2012, 14:56 PM	#2
SaraJewel Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Oxford Posts: 227	I agree, and a lot of what you have said sounds very familiar! We felt under a lot of pressure when we started ttc 7 months ago, this led to serious perfomance problems for my OH. Maybe the best thing to do is take the pressure off for a few months, maybe even stop using Ovulations sticks/BBT and just make sure you BD regularly. I think we are just starting to get back to normal now, although I do sometimes still feel stressed by the whole situation. We don't talk about ttc anymore in any particular detail as have found that just puts more stress on the situation. The more stressed I got, the more stressed my OH got and the worse our sex life became! I don't know if this helps, but just to let you know, I know how you feel. Good luck x

Status: Offline

Mar 26th, 2012, 15:01 PM	#3
gustav72 Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Posts: 109	Thanks for the advice, it helps. The performance issue just came up this month and we both feel really stressed by it. All the best as well and thanks again. The validation helps. P.S. I need to figure out what all the abbreviations mean in people's posts! lol

Status: Offline

Mar 26th, 2012, 15:05 PM	#4
SaraJewel Pregnant (Expecting) Active BnB Member Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Oxford Posts: 227	Check out the forum help area of the board: has a big long list of abbreviations! I know, it can feel a bit lonely when you can't really discuss it with friends as sometimes that can put even more pressure on!

Status: Offline

Apr 1st, 2012, 22:43 PM	#7
vermeil Other Active BnB Member Join Date: Oct 2009 Location: Montreal Posts: 808	yeah... the whole TTC 'adventure' can seriously make you go a little Everyone says 'don`t think about it! don`t sress!' yeah right, pretty much impossible

Status: Offline

Apr 2nd, 2012, 15:08 PM	#8
Kismet Trying to conceive (TTC) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2012 Location: Ontario, Canada Posts: 4,954	I'm 38 (39 in November) and my husband is 41. We're planning to start TTC in the summer. One thing I read was to BD regularly (every 2-3 days) and not worry about it otherwise. Of course, when you're younger, that's much easier to do! I know what you mean about not feeling able to talk to friends. My DH and I are keeping this very quiet because we don't want the pressure. Of course, that also means we don't get the support, either. That makes me sad, but finding places like this has helped a lot. I hope it helps you as well.

Status: Offline

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