Any else feel embarassed about taking longer to fall pregnant?

babyblog · May 2nd, 2011, 15:34 PM

Hi,

I wanted to see if anyone else feels like me. It took us 8 cycles to conceive our LO, which at the time felt like forever-but i am more than aware that 1) that is statistically 'normal', and 2) we conceived alot quicker than some.

However,when talking to my ante natal group friend i discovered that my 8 months was deemed a long time by them! We have been NTNP since he was born 17 months ago and TTC for the past 3, with no success. Whilst i am not starting to panic-i am dreading my friends asking me when i may have number 2.At this point, one of the group was due with her second last week and the others are thinking about TTC now. I am not telling most of them that we are TTC cos i know they may suggest that after not using contraception for 17 months i 'should' be pregnant by now.Any else relate?

michelleclare · May 2nd, 2011, 15:47 PM

Hey,
ttc is based on timing you would i have to have sex in the window of ovulation to get pregnant. So when it comes to ntnp you wont be tracking ovulation so you dont know when or if ovulation happens. Try not to worry about the time you were ntnp as it could just been down to timing and luck. Try and keep your chin up hun it will happen

swanxxsong · May 2nd, 2011, 15:49 PM

I know it's not easy but if you can, tune out the thoughts of others the best that you can. There is no "normal" with TTC, really. Some women take longer than others to regulate, some do not. And it's unfair of anyone to comment on "how long" it takes anyone to conceive, IMO.

Just keep your chin up, lovely.

I'm not TTC yet, and we don't have a LO yet, but I know women who took anywhere from 1 month to over a year to conceive. Since the window of opportunity is so slight, it's not always as 'easy' as people might assume, you know?

FX for you, hope you get your

soon! xo

honey08 · May 2nd, 2011, 15:54 PM

weve been ttc2 for 12mth/ 13th cycle now

and proper ttc aswell, i just think its pot luck, if we fell preg on our fertile window we wud be preg now

just have to wait i guess , latley ive had my sil/bro telling me there expecting in nov

and i do feel embarassed as they know how long weve been ttc ..... the tried for 2wk

xx

jennawatt13 · May 2nd, 2011, 15:56 PM

I feel the same way. My family is very fertile and they get pregnant pretty much as soon as they want to. I'm afraid to talk to any of my sisters about it. I know I havent been trying very long but I feel like with the way it happens for everyone else in my family it should have happened for me already.

shortnslow · May 2nd, 2011, 19:33 PM

I know exactly how you feel. I fell pregnant with all 3 of my girls by "accident" one of which was conceived on the pull out method and now that we are trying (hoping for a boy but will love a healthy baby really) it isn't happening. My sister-in-laws were all trying as well and fell pregnant right away and it has taken me 6 months so far. It is so embarrassing and frustrating.

LittleBird · May 2nd, 2011, 23:48 PM

Yes, I really used to have an easy time getting pregnant. When I got pregnant with MC1 in October, I never would have guessed it would end in MC. Once that happened, I figured we'd be able to get pregnant right away. I can't believe I'm here this many months later and still TTC. I think my embarrassment is more self-imposed than anything from outside pressures. But it's still there.

babyblog · May 3rd, 2011, 14:05 PM

Thanks ladies, whilst it's is nice to know i am not alone it's a shame that so many of us feel like this

I think i will forget the time i was NTNP, as i wasn't tracking or using OPK's, so i'll consider myself to have been trying for 3 months! Hope you all get your BFP's soon x

readyformore · May 3rd, 2011, 15:15 PM

I'm not embarrassed, I'm angry! (At who, I don't know, but I would certaintly like to complain to management.)

I know what the statistics say, and honestly, I don't know of a single person (aside from myself) that has taken longer than 4 months to conceive.

EmptyArms02 · May 3rd, 2011, 15:21 PM

I feel like there is something wrong with me. I feel like with each passing year it becomes more obvious to the world around me that I am not "normal" because I don't have children yet.

DH and I have been trying for 9 years. Took breaks for financial reasons and last year becasue of miscarriage. Starting meds to prepare to start again with donor IUI. Praying we get everything right this time.

May 2nd, 2011, 15:34 PM	#1
babyblog Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 3,093	Any else feel embarassed about taking longer to fall pregnant? Hi, I wanted to see if anyone else feels like me. It took us 8 cycles to conceive our LO, which at the time felt like forever-but i am more than aware that 1) that is statistically 'normal', and 2) we conceived alot quicker than some. However,when talking to my ante natal group friend i discovered that my 8 months was deemed a long time by them! We have been NTNP since he was born 17 months ago and TTC for the past 3, with no success. Whilst i am not starting to panic-i am dreading my friends asking me when i may have number 2.At this point, one of the group was due with her second last week and the others are thinking about TTC now. I am not telling most of them that we are TTC cos i know they may suggest that after not using contraception for 17 months i 'should' be pregnant by now.Any else relate?

Status: Offline

May 2nd, 2011, 15:47 PM	#2
michelleclare Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Jan 2011 Location: poole,uk Posts: 522	Hey, ttc is based on timing you would i have to have sex in the window of ovulation to get pregnant. So when it comes to ntnp you wont be tracking ovulation so you dont know when or if ovulation happens. Try not to worry about the time you were ntnp as it could just been down to timing and luck. Try and keep your chin up hun it will happen

Status: Offline

May 2nd, 2011, 15:49 PM	#3
swanxxsong Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Pennsylvania, USA Posts: 2,556	I know it's not easy but if you can, tune out the thoughts of others the best that you can. There is no "normal" with TTC, really. Some women take longer than others to regulate, some do not. And it's unfair of anyone to comment on "how long" it takes anyone to conceive, IMO. Just keep your chin up, lovely. I'm not TTC yet, and we don't have a LO yet, but I know women who took anywhere from 1 month to over a year to conceive. Since the window of opportunity is so slight, it's not always as 'easy' as people might assume, you know? FX for you, hope you get your soon! xo

Status: Offline

May 2nd, 2011, 15:54 PM	#4
honey08 Pregnant (Expecting) BnB Spammer Elite Join Date: Jul 2008 Location: north yorkshire,uk Posts: 30,874	weve been ttc2 for 12mth/ 13th cycle now and proper ttc aswell, i just think its pot luck, if we fell preg on our fertile window we wud be preg now just have to wait i guess , latley ive had my sil/bro telling me there expecting in nov and i do feel embarassed as they know how long weve been ttc ..... the tried for 2wk xx

Status: Offline

May 2nd, 2011, 15:56 PM	#5
jennawatt13 Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Location: Sarasota Fl Posts: 220	I feel the same way. My family is very fertile and they get pregnant pretty much as soon as they want to. I'm afraid to talk to any of my sisters about it. I know I havent been trying very long but I feel like with the way it happens for everyone else in my family it should have happened for me already.

Status: Offline

May 2nd, 2011, 19:33 PM	#6
shortnslow Mum (Mom) Active BnB Member Join Date: Apr 2011 Posts: 401	I know exactly how you feel. I fell pregnant with all 3 of my girls by "accident" one of which was conceived on the pull out method and now that we are trying (hoping for a boy but will love a healthy baby really) it isn't happening. My sister-in-laws were all trying as well and fell pregnant right away and it has taken me 6 months so far. It is so embarrassing and frustrating.

Status: Offline

May 2nd, 2011, 23:48 PM	#7
LittleBird Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Mar 2011 Location: Virginia, USA Posts: 4,381	Yes, I really used to have an easy time getting pregnant. When I got pregnant with MC1 in October, I never would have guessed it would end in MC. Once that happened, I figured we'd be able to get pregnant right away. I can't believe I'm here this many months later and still TTC. I think my embarrassment is more self-imposed than anything from outside pressures. But it's still there.

Status: Offline

May 3rd, 2011, 14:05 PM	#8
babyblog Mum (Mom) BnB Addict Join Date: Jan 2009 Posts: 3,093	Thanks ladies, whilst it's is nice to know i am not alone it's a shame that so many of us feel like this I think i will forget the time i was NTNP, as i wasn't tracking or using OPK's, so i'll consider myself to have been trying for 3 months! Hope you all get your BFP's soon x

Status: Offline

May 3rd, 2011, 15:15 PM	#9
readyformore Other BnB Addict Join Date: Jan 2011 Posts: 5,140	I'm not embarrassed, I'm angry! (At who, I don't know, but I would certaintly like to complain to management.) I know what the statistics say, and honestly, I don't know of a single person (aside from myself) that has taken longer than 4 months to conceive.

Status: Offline

May 3rd, 2011, 15:21 PM	#10
EmptyArms02 Trying to conceive (TTC) Active BnB Member Join Date: Jun 2010 Location: South Carolina Posts: 16	I feel like there is something wrong with me. I feel like with each passing year it becomes more obvious to the world around me that I am not "normal" because I don't have children yet. DH and I have been trying for 9 years. Took breaks for financial reasons and last year becasue of miscarriage. Starting meds to prepare to start again with donor IUI. Praying we get everything right this time.

Status: Offline

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