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Old Sep 16th, 2011, 12:10 PM   1
samoorah1983
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How do you expect to get pregnant if your husband is not in the Mood!!!!


How Am I going to get pregnant if my husband is not in the mood!! I tried to do everything .. were both business owners and we work 5-6 days a week, but our work is not a lot to do only 6 hours a day and the rest of the we relax and do whatever.. sometimes we work 11 hours but its not exhausting and we don't do physical work, just talking and greeting customers. Im soo irritated and every time I want to BD he would just say im tired im not in the mood.. but the rest of the days when Im not ovulating he wants to have sex!!! Im sooo mad!!!

Ladies what should I do?? Im really tired..



 
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Old Sep 16th, 2011, 12:17 PM   2
Ash0619
 
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I'm sorry, hun! It sounds like it's time to have a talk with him and see how much he wants a baby. Some men that have never gotten performance anxiety will get it when it comes to baby making sex, and be fine with just sex.
But what if you "plan" it with him in advance? Like, hand him a schedule: we need to have sex on this day, this day and this day to get pregnant.
It took me forever to get it through my DH's head that I am only fertile for a short period of time, he just thought random sex all month long would do the trick....so now that he has better understanding, and we're trying to get pregnant. honestly, sex is non-negotiable to me. He now knows it has to happen on certain days, and he better have a damn good reason for it not to happen.



 
Old Sep 16th, 2011, 12:17 PM   3
caity86
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totaly sympathise maybe you need to explain to him how the ovulation process works and how little time there really is to fertilize the egg.. my dh would always be like im tired not in the mood but I explained to him how it works and tbh I get really angry wen he wont bd cuz he's tired, we get tired too lol men are so weird sumtimes xxx



 
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Old Sep 16th, 2011, 12:22 PM   4
samoorah1983
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ash0619 View Post
I'm sorry, hun! It sounds like it's time to have a talk with him and see how much he wants a baby. Some men that have never gotten performance anxiety will get it when it comes to baby making sex, and be fine with just sex.
But what if you "plan" it with him in advance? Like, hand him a schedule: we need to have sex on this day, this day and this day to get pregnant.
It took me forever to get it through my DH's head that I am only fertile for a short period of time, he just thought random sex all month long would do the trick....so now that he has better understanding, and we're trying to get pregnant. honestly, sex is non-negotiable to me. He now knows it has to happen on certain days, and he better have a damn good reason for it not to happen.

I already explained to him that a week after my period is when I ovulate.. and this is not the first time.. every time we miss the Damn window every time.. You know why?? because he's tired or not in the mood..



 
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Old Sep 16th, 2011, 12:23 PM   5
samoorah1983
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Quote:
Originally Posted by caity86 View Post
totaly sympathise maybe you need to explain to him how the ovulation process works and how little time there really is to fertilize the egg.. my dh would always be like im tired not in the mood but I explained to him how it works and tbh I get really angry wen he wont bd cuz he's tired, we get tired too lol men are so weird sumtimes xxx

Yeah they're weird I agree with you, but it's been like this with me for 2 years.. I just give up Im done..



 
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Old Sep 16th, 2011, 15:09 PM   6
i want it all
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You could try giving him some surprise oral - I bet he's in the mood then after a second or 2!



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Old Sep 16th, 2011, 17:12 PM   7
samoorah1983
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Originally Posted by i want it all View Post
You could try giving him some surprise oral - I bet he's in the mood then after a second or 2!

Loool!! Ya ur right it works im gonna try that



 
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Old Sep 16th, 2011, 17:23 PM   8
jenmcn1
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ok I totally know how you feel!!! My DH has been the same since we started ttc#2 in June. It's SOOO frustrating!! And then when I got upset and told him I was ovulating...he had performance anxiety! UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyways, my doctor told me that STRESS is usually the big thing in these situations...sounds like you and your DH are super tired and maybe a little overwhelmed? Which happens. It might be a good idea to set aside a date night each week, to have a chance to reconnect and spend time together. Being business owners is ALOT of work...my husband owns his own business...so I know how it is. At the end of the day though - you need to make room for what's important...work is important and crucial, but your marriage is worth the investment - as well as baby making time! It just might have to involve a little cooperation and understanding from both of your sides at times. HUGS - I know how you're feeling xx



 
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Old Sep 16th, 2011, 17:25 PM   9
Tweak0605
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I so understand what you're going through. I finally had a long talk with my DH this cycle. I asked him if he knew just how badly I wanted it, and said it's the only thing I want in the world right now. I told him that it didn't make me feel like we were both on the same page, like he didn't want it bad enough. I also explained the whole ovulation thing, and how timing is key. The talk/fight we had really got to him I think. He didn't put up a fight about sex, or tell me he's too tired or not in the mood. He actually came in the bedroom on his own.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with that, I know what it's like, and like TTC is not stressful enough, that you have to deal with that



 
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