Defo want more inside gossip on the Adele front!!!
I havent seen the flat yet up close. Hopefully they will let us see it tonight. If there is a good size hall ill be storing the pram there definately unless the other occupants have a problem with that. The shopping and stuff i have no problem with, i use the stairs where i live now instead of the lift everytime exept when i have the pram. Good exercise lugging up bags lol!
I agree that proper co-sleeping actually reduces the risk of SIDS. Ive read up alot on co-sleeping and many anthropological studies regarding attitudes to co-sleeping around the world. Co-sleeping is the norm in most parts of Africa, Asia and in tribal communities. I think the problem in the west is that they lump suffocation, overheating and other such fatal accidents with SIDS when really SIDS is an un-explained death. Co-sleeing is a basic animal instict and has been done for thousands of years.
Did you freak out when Eloise fell on her head???? The first time Hero fell still haunts me lol!
it wasnt a serious bump, she landed on a few layers of quilt on the floor and only cried for about 10 seconds. she's still not talking to john though. Id be worried but shes smiling and giggling at me so she mustnt have hurt herself
i agree, the definition of sids is 'unexplained' - im sure one day they will work it out, but they dont even know what causes colic crying so maybe not. I read a heartbreaking account of sids online and the mother who wrote it said that once the process has started there is absolutely nothing that can be done to bring the baby back or to stop it.
2 flights of steps and shopping is my idea of a nightmare <lazyface>
So we went and saw the bigger flat, it was a complete stye....It was spacious and all but needs serious work done that the landlord isnt willing to pay for and we certainly cant afford. This house hunting malarky is getting very fustrating....
OMG Cesca, that is so sad! That must have been so scary for all the other moms to hear. So are you saying that wine increases the risk because she was breast feeding?
Toxins on the breath just like smoking, apparently. Although she was breastfeeding - it's another myth that breastfed babies do not die of SIDS.
Originally Posted by heart tree
I thought bumpers and quilts were a no no. Oh I'm so confused!
I don't use a quilt yet with Luca because he wriggles about so much and he'd get cold. I've used a bumper since he was about 6 months old, he sleeps better with a bumper because he doesn't bump his head!
Originally Posted by Allie84
BTW Cesca, what kind of sleep training did you do? It's been suggested to me to try sleep training to get Alistair to nap (he doesn't) but I'm not sure if I'm up for cry-it-out. Are there other ways or is that pretty much it?
Well we didn't really sleep train in terms of picking one technique and if that didn't try moving on. But i'll say it in that it was very important to us that Luca would sleep well - we are both really sleep orientated people and honestly I feel like I find everything so much harder if i'm tired. I'd rather go through a few hard times getting him to sleep than live my life constantly on edge because i've had no sleep.
We never did 'cry it out'. We always did shhhh/pat if he was upset and it is a lifesaver (for extending naps and in the middle of the night too), a really good wind down sleep routine, singing the same song for him to go to sleep, not going up if he's just having a bit of a moan etc.
Although I have let him cry sometimes, more like controlled crying though where I would go in at intervals (never timed like CC though, more like when I felt he needed some settling) and understanding what is a real 'I need you' cry. I am also an advocate of if you find things too hard, just walk outside and leave them screaming for a little while why you get your head together and take some deep breaths. I took the dummy away at 6 months too and did shhh/pat and pick up/put down to get him through that process and now my friends are going through the phase of their older child waking frequently in the night just for their dummy - I'm not.
It's been tough sometimes and I know my methods wouldn't be used by some mothers as sometimes it has involved crying, but never badly or for hours on end. I would not be able to handle that. Who knows if he'll have trust issues when older like some attachment parents suggest, I don't think so. He'll benefit much more from a mother who has more patience and more time to interact with him when he's awake though because she's had more sleep!
I did start all this very young though - like when he was 4-6 weeks old, because I was so sleep deprived and seriously wanting to just run away from it all because of it. He was in his own room at 8 weeks old too, because us moving would wake him up and because of his laryngomalacia his breathing was VERY loud we would hardly get any sleep either.
Not for everyone though. I hope you don't all hate me now and think I'm a bad mother!!
I read a heartbreaking account of sids online and the mother who wrote it said that once the process has started there is absolutely nothing that can be done to bring the baby back or to stop it.
The husband of the girl I know spent 15 mins trying to revive their baby before the ambulance arrived. That's what I find so distressing - them working on this obviously dead child trying their hardest to make him wake up
Two days younger than Luca. Two days. All they've missed out on that i've been lucky enough to see
Cesca, i just dare anyone to say you are a bad mother. I know no one on this thread would but the whole my technique is better than your technique rivalry between factions of mothers is revolting if you ask me. What makes a bad mother is a judgemental harpy who loves to preach. Not that im judging the judgemental...ahem.
I always think that the worst effect on a baby is an unhappy mother - that overrides the effect of any technique i believe. If the mother is happy, the baby is likely to be happy. So if you needed to do something you are concerned others wouldn't have done, you know your situation and what you need to do, no one else does.
the best thing about this thread is we are able to be honest with each other. without honesty then there's no real support.
I felt a cold shiver when you said about the parents trying to revive their little baby. It makes me feel physically sick to think of what they must have been through and are still going through.
Vic...sorry the flat turned out to be crappy...anything else lined up to see? I think i remember you saying that the crisis has made the rental market very tough too with high rents. have i missed an update on your af situation?
Jen- love the name, matches so nicely with aaron too. Kieran and Aaron. Also, i know 4 Kieran's and they are all ace people. I hate it when someone names their child 'sophie' cos i went to school with a right silly cow called sophie.
I forgot to twit twoo at everyones nurseries - they look amazing!! Mine is actually coming together now. Weirdly, i have somehow managed to make all the mismatched elements work together. I had a flash of inspiration and painted a pine mini wardrobe eau de nil blue and put sapphire blue glass handles on it, and its just pulled all the different colours together. Everything that doesn't match now fits somehow. I'm now painting the cot chalk pink then will post a photo
Nope no other flats lined up at the mo....By this rate Hero will be sleeping with us until she leaves for college...
Property prices are still high although for the life of me i dont understand why! I thought crisis meant prices went down...sigh....
Cesca obviously youre not a bad monther crazy fool! I think its interesting though that new mothers seem to have to justify their parenting in the fear that they will be labeled a bad parent. I get alot of critisism from friends and extended family for choosing to work long hours and going on buisness trips. Although i usually tell them to mind their own buisness sometimes i go on and on about why i am doing this...I wish we could all feel confident that we are doing the best we can.
Today Hero ate a ball of popi's fur! She's shedding like mad and im not keeping up with the housework lately. I felt so bad (insert bad mommy guilt here) and got to cleaning right away. The fur...oh my god the massive amount of fur that i cleaned away...totally gross...
I think its interesting though that new mothers seem to have to justify their parenting in the fear that they will be labeled a bad parent.
in my experience, it seems everyone has somert to say about what im doing. If i hear one more person say 'well we didn't do it like that' I am going to launch a spinning kick. Fuck off with your 'put her in another room to sleep' and 'leave her alone' when she starts 'fussing'.
Doesn't matter what you do, someone will have a raised eyebrow for you. Screw them. Do what is right for you.
Cant wait to start having to defend Eloise being vegetarian. That is going to open a floodgate. Im going to be swimming in criticism.
The house hunting sounds like a nightmare. My FIL's labrador sprays everywhere with fur just walking past nonchalantly in December. So a furry dog in a Greek climate is going to kick out some serious hair balls i bet
Vic did you get my fb message? I only ask cos its not like you to not respond
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