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Old May 20th, 2013, 13:40 PM   8091
hello_kitty
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Thanks Christie,

In the meantime I bought the powdered shakes to supplement with my meals.

I seriously wonder how some men can be so useless when it comes to taking care of a child. They are so patient and put the frustration on us. Since my husband came back home from his vacation, I swear things havent been the same. I just cant quite put a finger on it. He always loses his temper with me. He complained about how I havent been working for the past few months and how we run out of money if I dont begin working. I work from home, so its quite an easy job I just need him to take care of Zachary while I'm working. I had a problem with waking up early to start work, but this morning I woke up when the alarm went off and started my 4 hour shift. Zachary started crying shortly after I logged on to work and I went out and made him a bottle.

Shortly after the bottle, Zachary started crying, and since I didnt have any calls at the moment and went to check on him, turns out he pooped. My husband told me to change him and I was about to when a had a call from my job and left the changing to him. My husband muttered something I think I heard "You never work when you should". I was busy for most of the time afterwards.

He was finally able to soothe Zachary and both of them slept for about 2 hours while I did my job. At 11:20, right after a call ended Zachary started crying again. I thought my husband could handle it so after the call I went on the internet a little bit. He came into the office and gave me a smirk and was like "the baby's crying and you're in here typing on the internet? He's hungry" I was like "I just had a call that just ended!" Anyway, I ran over and breastfed him a little bit before I had another call.

I seriously dont understand why he cant get up off his ass and make the little guy a bottle. I do it all the freaking time and you dotn see me complaining. He doesnt even know how to make a bottle, he leaves everything up to me. He takes care of Zachary once in awhile, but not without complaining. He doesnt even know how to put the poor guy to sleep. No wonder Zachary clearly prefers me over him. He tries to deny that, but its so true. He tries to hold Zachary close to his chest but the guy resists and looks over at me.

Anyway, my husband just pisses me off, and I think I am seriously, and no, I am not joking, starting to hate him. He doesnt believe me, but its the true. Sometimes I just want to break down in tears. If it werent for Zachary holding me back, I would 110% leave!



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Old May 23rd, 2013, 05:37 AM   8092
AC1987
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Oh wow thats not good

Have you sat down and talked to him about your feelings?

But I agree that DH's are useless when it comes to taking care of babies, prehaps thats why woman have them and not men

I find watching my LO hard enough on my own, I can't imagine having to work on top of that.



 
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Old May 23rd, 2013, 15:47 PM   8093
boxxey
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Quote:
Originally Posted by hello_kitty View Post
Thanks Christie,

In the meantime I bought the powdered shakes to supplement with my meals.

I seriously wonder how some men can be so useless when it comes to taking care of a child. They are so patient and put the frustration on us. Since my husband came back home from his vacation, I swear things havent been the same. I just cant quite put a finger on it. He always loses his temper with me. He complained about how I havent been working for the past few months and how we run out of money if I dont begin working. I work from home, so its quite an easy job I just need him to take care of Zachary while I'm working. I had a problem with waking up early to start work, but this morning I woke up when the alarm went off and started my 4 hour shift. Zachary started crying shortly after I logged on to work and I went out and made him a b

Shortly after the bottle, Zachary started crying, and since I didnt have any calls at the moment and went to check on him, turns out he pooped. My husband told me to change him and I was about to when a had a call from my job and left the changing to him. My husband muttered something I think I heard "You never work when you should". I was busy for most of the time afterwards.

He was finally able to soothe Zachary and both of them slept for about 2 hours while I did my job. At 11:20, right after a call ended Zachary started crying again. I thought my husband could handle it so after the call I went on the internet a little bit. He came into the office and gave me a smirk and was like "the baby's crying and you're in here typing on the internet? He's hungry" I was like "I just had a call that just ended!" Anyway, I ran over and breastfed him a little bit before I had another call.

I seriously dont understand why he cant get up off his ass and make the little guy a bottle. I do it all the freaking time and you dotn see me complaining. He doesnt even know how to make a bottle, he leaves everything up to me. He takes care of Zachary once in awhile, but not without complaining. He doesnt even know how to put the poor guy to sleep. No wonder Zachary clearly prefers me over him. He tries to deny that, but its so true. He tries to hold Zachary close to his chest but the guy resists and looks over at me.

Anyway, my husband just pisses me off, and I think I am seriously, and no, I am not joking, starting to hate him. He doesnt believe me, but its the true. Sometimes I just want to break down in tears. If it werent for Zachary holding me back, I would 110% leave!



 
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Old May 23rd, 2013, 19:16 PM   8094
hello_kitty
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Thanks Christie! That was very helpful!

Ashley,

I tried talking to him productively but whenever I raise the topic he thinks I'm joking. The only time he takes me seriously is when we are arguing, but arguing is never a good thing since we always block each other's words out and go at each other full blast. He thinks I am the one who's causing all this trouble. He doesnt see us having a problem. He does stupid things, I swear. For example, we were given a whole bunch of preemie formula from friends and family after he was born. He ended up breastfeeding exclusively so we ended up not using them. I was going to resell them to get some money. It works fine for both parties, I get some extra money and the other mom gets affordable formula at a discount. Or I might just donate it to someone who is really in need. Well, he went to visit his family last month and had to run his mouth about the extra formula we have at home and how "good" the ingredients are.

His cousin has a 9 (now 10) month old baby, and she was complaining about how the formula we have is the best and what they have over there is manufractured in France (which is the best they have over there) but is still not as good as what we have. She asked if we can give them to her since Zachary is not using it. First off, they are rich. They have a family business and their fortune is probably 10X more than what we have. They CAN afford the formula. Why not buy it off of ebay or somewhere else, and let us save our formula for someone who really needs it? The shipping cost is at least $80, if we ship it to them.

We had a mild argument about giving his cousin the formula. First off, the formula is for preemies. He argued and said that his nephew was 3 weeks early. Excuse me, but a baby that is born after 37 weeks is not considered a preemie. Plus, the baby is already 10 months old. What good would the formula do for him now? What if he doesnt get used to the formula? It would end up being a total waste. He DOESNT get my point!

There's just too many things that I could list but I'll stop here. Lets just say I hate him and divorce is not an option because I dont want my baby to grow up in a broken family. I read about how kids could be majorly affected if parents separate and I am not going to do it. I'd rather sacrifice my happiness for my baby.



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Old May 24th, 2013, 05:38 AM   8095
AC1987
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Men!

You know what helps me sometimes? When I can't seem to get my words out right... I write a letter and give that to my DH so he can get where I'm coming from. And you don't even hafta do it while you're fighting, sometimes its better when hes calm so he can read it and pay attention.
Let him know how you're hurting, I'm sure if he really loves you then he will feel bad and appologize, not saying he'll actually fix the problem.



 
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Old May 24th, 2013, 15:09 PM   8096
hello_kitty
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AC1987 View Post
Men!

You know what helps me sometimes? When I can't seem to get my words out right... I write a letter and give that to my DH so he can get where I'm coming from. And you don't even hafta do it while you're fighting, sometimes its better when hes calm so he can read it and pay attention.
Let him know how you're hurting, I'm sure if he really loves you then he will feel bad and appologize, not saying he'll actually fix the problem.
At least your husband will read your letter, I dont think my husband would even care. Even if he did, he would conclude that I am the one who's causing all the trouble. At least your husband lets you stay at home and watch the lo, while my husband has been complaining that I'm taken too much time off of work (sigh). He caught me writing this, and started yelling at me. He hates the truth! To be honest I used to have an ex boyfriend before him and I thought he was bad but turns out my husband is worse. I love Zachary to death, but sometimes I think if it werent for him I wouldnt be stuck in this situation. He always loses his temper. I paid his bills late and had 2 late charges and he started yelling at me and calling me names. He could've just ask me nicely if I could call into the center and request them to refund the late charges. IF that didnt work out, then he could start yelling at me or whatever. He always say that I am lazy. He think taking care of a baby is a piece of cake. I am only 23 years old, I still have a lonnnng road ahead of me...with this lunatic. So I have concluded, and remind myself CONSTANTLY that no more babies unless he changes significantly. I used to want to have a lot of babies, but to the right man...with the way things are right now, Zachary will do. At least it would be easier for me to walk out on him one day if the time comes. Gosh I just dont understand why he always feel like he has to scream everyone of his sentences when talking to me. I hate him so muchhh!



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Old May 24th, 2013, 18:09 PM   8097
hello_kitty
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So after our argument I told my husband to take the bus to work since I will be taking the car. I was very angry and didnt really mean it later. I came home 50 minutes before his work time and had I feeling he might've left. Well, he did. Now I feel all guilty about having him take the bus. I think Zachary and me will find a temporary place to stay for the night because I just feel akward around my husband and dont want to get into anymore fights.



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Old May 24th, 2013, 18:50 PM   8098
AC1987
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Aww You're right, I do have it pretty good at the moment, even though me and my DH do get into stupid little arguements mostly things are good.

I'm sorry its not really working out, but yelling at you won't solve anything. Maybe he'll realize this..
I hope you two can work it out.



 
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Old May 25th, 2013, 13:44 PM   8099
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Aww sorry hello kitty sorry dont really have any advice but sending u some love!
My oh always seems to blame me for everything too and also complains about me not working, even tho i start back in 2 weeks



 
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Old May 25th, 2013, 18:06 PM   8100
hello_kitty
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I went to my sister's house last night before he got home from work and was gonna stay there for the night before he started blasting my phone when he realized we were gone. My sister forced us to go home and work things out. I guess we have made up but he still doesnt understand my point of view about the formula issue, and he LIED to me about his sister being pregnant. I dont know whats the point in lying to me that his sister is currently pregnant. She just got married a month ago, and I'm like "did she get pregnant before she got married?" and he's like "they might've gotten pregnant on their honeymoon" and I said "how do you know" him: "My brother called and told me". Just to prove he was lying I checked the call history of his cell phone and his brother never called him yesterday. Why does he feel the need to lie to me about such a trivial matter?



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