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Originally Posted by LoveandSeven Hello there ladies,
I'm wondering if any of you can help me come to some sort of conclusion concerning my situation..
My Fiance and I happily found out we were expecting in December, after months of trying for our first bub. I went through a tough few weeks of bad cramping and spotting which frightened me so much that I didn't want to get out of bed for days on end. Only for us to lose our precious baby on the 14th of January through m/c at close to 8 weeks.
Being absolutely heartbroken, we then came to find out that my younger sister in law who lives with us, and already has a one year old, is once again pregnant. And she too, was around 8 weeks along last time they checked.
Knowing that everything in our life happens for a reason that God intended, I ask you lovely women, what do you believe my lesson will be now? I really don't know how I will handle watching her belly grow at the rate that mine was going to grow, watching her baby be born into the world, very close to when mine was going to be born.. I'm trying to figure out why I will be tortured seeing these things right in front of me? That way I can at least have something in my mind that says the entire process is worth it somehow.  |
I just felt like the Lord spoke these words to me, 'If i put you in a comfortable situation, i would expect you to feel comfortable. But it is when i put you in a challenging, that i want to see you rise.'
So often we feel that when we are placed in situations that are in our ability to handle, we are able to conquer the mission, to pass the test. But that is far from where God wants us to stay. Unfortunately we live in a world that is unjust, that is unfair and sometimes we have no choice but to stand, be the strong person we don't feel inside and stride ahead. Our heart and mind may not necessarily be inspired to be brave and to show happiness to those around us, but soon enough, God sees that we are trying, and allows our body to catch up with our mind, so that we are intentionally doing good in his eyes.
Now i'm not speaking from someone who hasn't got a clue what your going through, infact the situation you are enduring was infact mine mid last year...
My SIL (as lovely as she can be) found out we were pregnant at the same time as her (she announced it alot sooner then we did) and it wasnt long before she told me exactly how she felt about our pregnancy. 'I should of waited a year until she had all the attention' 'I should of pre-warned her that we were trying' 'She wanted to be the only person in the family with a baby' etc. It did more then hurt, i was heartbroken. We miscarried a week later.
I'm not a quick learner, I learnt the hard way. I told my husband we couldn't see them anymore, had endless amount of arguments, i couldnt deal with the loss. I put our m/c before my SIL, before my marriage, and before God. I had nothing else left emotionally, that one day i went to her house and left my bitterness at her door.
I was that determined to rid my body of resentment i did everything my heart did not want to do.
- I looked after her baby during the night the first week she was born
- (Im a child's photographer as a second job) so i took her post baby photo's inc her maternity
- I prepare meals for throughout the weeks after the birth
Everything i didnt want to do, i did. For the grace of God. I knew the more i pressed on, the more resentment left my body and i was able to deal with my grief, knowing 'This was a difficult situation for me, God wanted me to
rise above it'
I pray that God will use you during your pain, that you will break through the hurt of seeing her belly grow & watching her progress. So that you will be able to see what yGod has in store for you, knowing heartedly that he is looking out for you, even if you do not feel or see it.
XXX