Great advice Nutshake, and I echo everything you have said. I don't like to call it controlled crying, because if you can get the technique right, there is no need to be leaving a baby to scream themselves into meltdown.

With a dark, peaceful bedroom, recognised by your baby as their 'quiet, sleeping room', it is possible to put them to bed firmly and with minimal interaction then walk away. The door should be all but closed - tho I leave it slightly ajar so I can hear them, and they can be allowed to cry. If implemented correctly, you'll find that there is an initial period of crying, maybe even for up to an hour, but eventually this gets less and your baby recognises that it is time to sleep not demand attention. It is so important that they get this message for their health and well being as well as yours - a tired, fractious baby is miserable and below par during the day and night, and it becomes a vicious cycle.

This week my 'good baby' has been tricky to settle where previously he would go down with zero fuss. I found myself falling into the trap of returning immediately to him as soon as he cried. As soon as he saw me at the door he shut up, so i knew there was nothing wrong with him. After that I settled him back down, closed the door and left for atleast 10mins. Initally there ws protest and crying, but after a few returns within the hour he settled himself back to sleep and all is well again

It's hard to perservere, because you're never quite sure if you're doing the right thing or not, but trust me, sticking to this approach really does pay off. Very quickly you have a settled happy baby who sleeps thru. Being consistent with the bed time message you send out is key - keep the routine EXACTLY the same, no chopping and changing in panic if they don't intially seem to respond to the method. Stick with it and it does work. I have had by nature 'difficult to settle ' babies, who don't automatically self-soothe, and each of them has responded well to this approach. xxx

You ladies are the greatest!!! Thanks for all the info. Nut_Shake: the detailed schedule is awesome!

Also, just to add. Mine started sleeping through the night at 4.5 months old, but depends on every baby. Mine still have their weeks where they are all over the place waking through the night but generally they are so good bless them.

My routine now is slightly different; first nap is at 9.30, lunch is at 12, nap at 1.30 and dinner at 5.45. Everything else is the same.

My two have NEVER been big sleepers in the day, they sleep generally for about 40 mins at each nap, sometimes a little longer but 45 mins on average, so don't pull your hair out wondering why they won't sleep longer even if you try. My friends boy is 4 days older than my two, he has 2 naps a day and each is 2 hours long! Just depends on the baby. However from what I've been told by professionals they need a sleep of 11 to 12 hours at night.

There are some amazing women on here to help, honestly, I was in such an awful state earlier on. The ladies on here gave me so much strength to get though it, lizziedripping being one of them if you ever need to ask a question we are here, I couldn't have survived without this special little multiples community! Xxxxxx

Just to add, Nutshake's lo's still have two naps a day which works well for her and her family, but in general by this age and from approx 6mths onwards, babies can drop down to one longer nap after lunch. Initially it is hard to stretch them from early morning to afternoon without some whinginess, but eventually they can cope with the transition and are able to manage to around 1pm. The sleep can then be around 2hrs long. Apply the same rules if they wake after 40mins, and a firm 'sleep now' command on waking and a hasty retreat, and baby will learn to re settle themselves. Eventually they will stir after '40 winks' but return to sleeping without any help at all.

All theses schedules are about having confidence to carry them out and know they will work. Babies actually want and need to sleep and look to you to help them achieve this. If you waiver then they waiver too, quickly taking your cue of uncertainty and following suit. Be firm, keep the message simple, and walk away. As NS says, initially it will be hard, but within a few days the transformation is remarkable. Remembering that your babies need you to teach them how to sleep will help you to stick with it - they would thank you if they could for a sound and peaceful night's sleep x

Thanks for the great info nutshake and lizzie

My girls are 9 weeks old so I would love to see the schedules you have for 8 and 12 week olds when you get chance. xxx

Nut-shake...

Awesome info thank you so much! I would love to know about the 8 week schedule! I think I have a routine but my OH left me when they were 5 weeks old so I have been by myself and I am quiet exhausted and for some reason can't nap during the day when they do. So any extra help to try something would be lovely. I dont expect them to sleep thru the night but would love to have more than 2 hr stretchs of sleep.

Here is a feed and sleep pattern/routine for an 8 week old. My babies were still waking 3 times in the night for feeds at this point which soon dropped to 2 when I introduced the routine.

7am - wake up and bottle/breast feed
8am - 8.30am nap for 45 mins/1.5 hrs
9am
10am - bottle/breast feed
11am - nap for 1/2 hrs
12pm
1pm - bottle/breast feed
2pm
3pm - nap for 30 mins/1 hr
4pm - bottle/beast feed*
5pm - nap for 30 mins and a top up milk feed at 5.30 if you think baby wants it
6pm - at 6.30 pm bath then bottle/breast feed
7pm - Bed

Here is one for a 12 week old. Mine dropped from 2 feeds to 1 in the night and they were waking at set times every night before they stopped waking for a feed at 4.5 months, which was about 3 weeks before I introduced solids.

7am - wake up and bottle/breast feed
8am - 8.30am nap for 45 mins/1.5 hrs
9am
10am
11am - bottle/breast feed
12pm -*nap for 1.5/2.5 hrs
1pm
2pm
3pm -*bottle/beast feed*
4pm - nap at 4.30pm for at most 45 mins
5pm
6pm - at 6.30 pm bath then bottle/breast feed
7pm - Bed

Really hope it helps. Stick to it TntArs06, you are so amazing doing it by yourself, please message me if you ever need any help xxxx

Thanks that's great, I will see how I get on with the 8 week routine. xx

Thank you soo much! That is awesome!!