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Old Jan 6th, 2011, 12:18 PM   11
MummytoSummer
 
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My husband was the one who wanted to start trying before I did so I can't offer advice on that really but whenever the subject came up we did used to argue about it. He was 30 when we started trying and I was 27, he'd constantly remind me how I wasn't getting any younger! Way to make a girl feel good! Lol! In the end it was purely down to my age that I caved in and started to try, I wanted to be no older than 30 when I'm done having babies (although that may now not be possible as we think we now want 3 instead of 2)

My husband used to show me print outs from the Internet of statistics showing womens ages and their fertility and how it declines etc etc. I guess it was things like that that worked with me in the end. My husband is a bit different to others and most guys really don't get the urgency women feel to have children. Without sounding like you're pestering him have you tried sitting down with him with all the information about fertility etc and showing him and taking him through it? Maybe when he sees the facts in black and White it might hit home about why you feel uncomfortable waiting.

I hope you can come to a compromise. Or I hope he just caves in! Lol!

Hugs!

Good luck

X



 
Old Jan 7th, 2011, 04:20 AM   12
Twag
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We don't argue about it that is the thing, as I know he does want to have children and he is very broody around my 8 month old neice but he is just stubborn and always does what his mother says (only child) it just annoys me, i am more annoyed at her to be honest for sticking her oar in where it is not needed!
I get on with my mother in law so upsets me that I have this underlying anger at her (



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Old Jan 7th, 2011, 04:27 AM   13
Twag
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I have shown him so many times the research etc on fertitily as you get older etc etc and he understands about the clock ticking away etc he has just got it in his head that we have to wait until after my exams are done, doesn't help that he is super stubborn!

Sure I will wear him down eventually!

You would have thought his mother who is 60 would want grandchildren as she coos over other babies etc!!



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Old Jan 7th, 2011, 11:55 AM   14
odd_socks
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men = stubborn



 
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Old Jan 9th, 2011, 05:31 AM   15
rj84
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right there with you


Hi all,
I'm 26, hubby 27, married for 2.5 years.
Hubby been very reluctant to begin trying for about a year, but have finally come off the pill - still no true AF after 4 weeks - been on the CP for 8 years, can't really remember what my cycle was before and had only been have true AFs for less than 2 years.
feeling very frustrated as have been broody for a long time! Hubby wanted to use other protection but have only done that once, even though he still says he doesn't want to try!! all very confusing - want a Yay or Nay - easier to get my head around!! We've got our own house, a supportive family and good jobs - just think he's scared!! Don't really want to share with others as everyone seems to be wondering why there's no pitter patter yet!



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Old Jan 9th, 2011, 05:52 AM   16
rj84
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Twag View Post
I am in a similar position, we always agreed that once we got married we would start trying for a baby.

So we got married in Nov'10 and just before then I came off my pill as we both agreed and we decided to see what happens, but this his mother spoke to him about it and said we should wait until after I have finished my exams (I am studying ACCA whilst working and have 3 more exams which is another year), so now hubby has decided his mother is correct and that I would have no incentive to complete my exams if I was pregnant or have a baby, which i disagree with and I am not going back on the pill!

I am 30 he is 32, this year I will be 31! I am really worried that once we do start trying after my exams (last one December 2011) it will take a year to conceive and then I will be 33 before we have a child! This really worries me and is putting me under a lot of pressure to pass my exams when they are hard enough as it is!

I try talking to him to come around but nothing and it is making me very upset as I am so broody and our friends are having 2nd babies and my sisters

I just don't know what to do
Oh I know how you feel! My OH is doing the ACCA, and like you won't be finished until the summer with luck, December if fail. MIL shouldn't get involved - I'm the other way my mum and MIL are desperate to become grandmas! The dropping of not so subtle hints make things worse as I'm so desperate to start TTC properly but he is still reluctant. I finally managed to come off the pill last month, but only if we started to use condoms. the thing is he's only used them once in the last month (and we're certainly not a once a month couple!) so I'm totally confused what he wants!!! We've been married for 2.5 years and I've always been on the side of broody but quite keen on TTC for over a year - one of the worst year's of my life! He just doesn't get it! and Babies babies everywhere!!!
Baby dust to you! Sorry I can only sympathise not give any advise!!!



 
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Old Jan 10th, 2011, 13:03 PM   17
Augie
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It's so, so hard. Sometimes I lay awake at night and just silently weep to myself. I try so hard not to pressure him, but it's challenging when the need is so profound for me. I find myself buying baby and pregnancy magazines and reading them and I just end up feeling tortured. He finally agreed on a date, so now I just have to wait until it's time to get off BC.



 
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Old Jan 11th, 2011, 15:24 PM   18
odd_socks
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i wish i could convince my OH to TTC now tbh is so hard knowing im not getting any younger and the yearn for a baby is sooo strong is horrible crying myself to sleep knowing i have no idea how long it will be untill he changes his mind



 
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Old Jan 11th, 2011, 16:51 PM   19
aubreee
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Oh it's so hard isn't it.....i wish my OH could feel this broody for just one day and then see how he deals with it...stupid hormones


But what I do to distract myself from that longing for a baby is thinking about all the things that i couldn't do when pregnant or when i have a LO

like right now i am enjoying a glass of wine and i enjoy it and tell myself... "see you would have to miss out on this for more than 9 months" and it makes me feel a tiny bit better

or I love hooping and aerial silks, but i know with a bump i wouldn't be able to do that, and so I go and enjoy doing that when the broodiness kicks in and it helps me

so maybe you have some things that you would have cut down on while preggers or a mummy and then go and enjoy them as some sort of broodiness-therapy ?!?




 
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Old Jan 12th, 2011, 15:00 PM   20
biliboi2
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I notice that the opening poster is now expecting!



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