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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 00:09 AM   1
youngone
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people making me feel guilty for the way I am


you know how everyone has that one person they know who is 40 and childless or 30 and single and thus not living up to expectations? well, i feel for them. Because I feel that way too- only its on the other side of the scale.

I'm 20, and I love reading, chilling out at home, studying and spending night in with OH. My idea of a good time is visiting interior design stores or researching property development or pregnancy. Going out often seems like a bigger mission then its worth.

My dad is crazy and fun and he thinks I'm boring and tells me "lives for living"
But I do have fun and am happy, just doing other things. All my friends all over the world, at half moon parties and backpacking and going to concerts. I hate crowds.

I do have an outgoing personality, don't get me wrong, I just like what I like. But i've had a lot of comments this summer about how I should be more crazy or not think so much or that I push myself too much and I should act my age.

I really really want to be like everyone else my age and have those crazy raging amazing insane years before having children and things, so I don't regret anything in the future. But the only things that run through my mind is 'houses houses houses job job job career career career pregnancy pregnancy pregnancy babies babies ' I swear I'm an adult trapped in a young persons body- I've always been this way!

It's not necessarily a bad thing I quite like it, BUT others are sort of making me feel bad like I'm weird and I'm missing out and i'll regret it.

The real issue is that I'm graduating University soon, and everyones talking about me going overseas on a huge OE or this or that- and I pretend to want to do it- but most of all, I've been waiting so long to start my career and always wanted a home...so I kinda want to get on with that instead (I've already been to 15 countries by the way) but my parents are being harsh and don't want me 'settling down' yet. GEEZ PEOPLE! Just let me be a weirdo OK!

Does anyone else feel like a let down to their age? like you should be doing something different (maybe young mums?) Did anyone try to do it the expected way? should I try to be crazy for a couple more years? yay for weirdness!!

Thanks! and I'm so sorry for the rant!!







 
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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 00:15 AM   2
youngone
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I wish my family would just be OK with me buying a house, renting it out and then traveling. I've been saving for 5 years and finally have my deposit.



 
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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 01:50 AM   3
Amygdala
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Don't let them get to you! Sounds like you're enjoying your life the way it is, so don't change it for other people's sake! Why should you travel the world right now if you don't want to? If you regret not doing it in ten years time, you take a sabbatical and do it then! Life is for living but it's for living your own way! Who are they to judge what should make you happy and what shouldn't!



 
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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 01:52 AM   4
comotion89
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well done!!! I splashed my cash on clothes goin out with the OH and other stuff like holidays , but I'm spoilt so mums got me a deposit (thank god) I sometimes feel like I'm acting too old for my age (23) as we're house hunting , wedding planning etc but then again I do like to have fun me and OH want to go to Disney land Florida before we have kids hahah I used to be soo broody erm more so as I fell pregnant last year and the whole of 2012 I battled with myself and regret but we decided we aren't in a rush I think the added permanent responsibility at present is abit daunting we are waiting till I'm at least 26,27 , but I'm all for getting a house and stable , plus I don't so the club scene I find myself sounding like my mum! commenting on the scantily clad girls and dying things like youngsters these days lol



 
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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 03:02 AM   5
xLeeBeex
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I am exactly the same, my OH is older than me as well, and people seem to think that I'm not living my life because i've settled down too quickly and stuff. But after the crappy childhood I had, and how crazy it was at times, I think I deserve to be able to settle down, focus on gettin a career/house/starting a family.

It's what I want! Don't get me wrong, sometimes, I would like to go to a club or go to a party, but then after a little dance, that's it i'm good to go home again lol. Surrounded by sweaty drunken people is not my idea of a good night out, I just like to get my dancing fix lol.

Anyway, I'm digressing. I completely agree though, people say "you're settling down too early, go live your life" and I think, I am living my life, in the way that I want to, now piss off!



 
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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 07:08 AM   6
Elpis_x
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Yes, I feel like this a lot of the time. I moved out of my parent's home and moved in with my OH when I was 19 and we moved a good few hours away, whilst the rest of my friends were at university. So I had to deal with the responsibilities of bills, working etc. whilst they were all out having fun!

I just started university, at the age of 21 and I'm trying to embrace it as much as possible. I have made friends, but almost all of them are still 18 and this is their first time away from home, so they obviously have a very different mind set to me. I make time to go out and things, but I am very work, career and family oriented, and won't put anything before that.

I still enjoy going out, partying, spending money on trivial things etc., but honestly I did a lot of that when I was 18, so I kind of feel like I'm done with it! I enjoy trawling round these forums and looking at things for the house more than going out now And me and OH are planning on buying a home as soon as possible once I'm done with university.

Honestly, I think people should just do whatever makes them happy in life! There's lots of people who enjoy not settling down, not buying houses or having a family, and on the other hand there's many people who dream of having a nice house and a family. I don't think it matters, it's good to have an idea of what you want in life, whatever that is.



 
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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 07:19 AM   7
LovemyBubx
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I had DD when i was 19, im not really into the whole getting drunk/clubbing kind of thing & thats what would happen on girlie holidays so ive never been. (this is what my old friends are doing now)

My idea of a good time right now is me & OH taking DD on a special day out (maybe to a theme park or the beach) having a nice lunch out, & having a evening watching a disney film snuggled on the sofa together.

I dont feel like im missing anything, im am looking forward to the time when our children are grown & me & OH will have lovely holidays together & also big family holidays.

Just do what makes you happy x



 
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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 07:31 AM   8
MissN8
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Its your life so live it how you like and makes you feel happy. Everyone is different and you have to do what makes your life complete. Please dont let anyone criticise your choices.



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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 08:30 AM   9
wtbmummy
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I know what you mean. Me and DH got married end of last year. (Hes 25 and I'm 24) For our hooneymoon they sent us to magaluf so we could enjoy the party scene luckily being seasonal everything was closed down clubs wise. We really dont understand. People are always telling us to enjoy being young and getting out and drinking.
We dont get drunk ever!!!! Our idea of a drink is one watching a movie at home or going out for a quiet meal.
We are going to start trying for a family this year and we darent tell them cause they will tell us to do other things :$
Do what makes you happy and ignore everyone else, thats what we do In the end your family will be happy with your choice. Its YOUR life.
And yay for weirdos staying in instead of yucky sweaty clubs full of kids (despite being close in age)



 
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Old Jan 7th, 2013, 09:36 AM   10
xLeeBeex
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Lol, "yucky sweaty clubs full of kids" haha! Yes, I mean, last time I went I felt like I was surrounded by 12 year olds, some of the girls dress absolutely ridiculously and with how good the fake i.d's are these days they just let anyone in!



 
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