Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old May 4th, 2010, 16:22 PM   1
Belle
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Birmingham
Posts: 3,542

Anyone else trying to convince Hubby for another baby?


ladies,
Hope your well?
I am currently trying to convince my husband into trying for baby number 3. At the moment he's not having any of it
But I feel recently since going on about it ALOT that we may have ever so slighlty turned a corner. ( This being he humors me know when i talk about what i want etc) He has listened to my reasons and i have also listened to his but we've kinda just got oursleves stuck, i still want to try he does not
Anyone else having this problem with the OH's or been there and got anywhere?
Any advice? Should i just not have number 3 cuz it makes him happy?



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 4th, 2010, 16:52 PM   2
Wombat
Other
Chat Happy BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: UK
Posts: 1,129
I am with you on this one girl!

Exactly the same thing, already to kids, I want another one, DH doesn't.
I listened to him, he listened to me and we are stuck...
Decided to wait a couple of years and then talk again.

I really want another one! If I could I would have 10 (probably!)



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 4th, 2010, 17:18 PM   3
Belle
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Birmingham
Posts: 3,542
I only want 1 more, my youngest will be 2 in September and i really want another while she is young. The age gap between my son and daughter is 4years and i don't want that this time!
I dont know what to say now to get him to see that waiting just isn't an option 4 me!!
Good luck with yours!!



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 4th, 2010, 22:29 PM   4
Mamabel
Mum (Mom)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 165
Hi gals, what a great post!

I am a success story, but it took me four years to win this argument! We have two girls, now ages 6 & 8, and I turned 40 last year. The biological clock is ticking. He finally relented when I broke down crying. I explained that if we don't have baby #3, I will definitely have to go to therapy, because in my mind, she is a real person, and just not here yet. To not have her would be like losing a child. Not making this up or exaggerating. She is a part of me and has to join our family.

I can honestly say that not having her would have damaged our 10-year marriage. Maybe that's extreme, but it's just how I've felt since the day I gave birth to my 2nd daughter. I just knew there was one more to come.

Now the bad part: got pregnant in February, and he was really lukewarm. Miscarried on April 1st, and he was okay, but not really someone I could go to with all my sadness. Thank god for girlfriends and this forum. He's an excellent dad and a great guy, don't get me wrong. But, it will definitely be a bummer to go through the last pregnancy with such a lukewarm partner. However, he's assured me that once she gets here, he will be fine, and I believe him. The whole pregnancy thing, he just doesn't get it, and I have to let that be okay. But it does make it a bit lonelier for me to not be able to rely on him to share every detail with me. Good news: my 8-year-old will be a great pregnancy buddy, and she is super-psyched. We will try again mid-July, and I'm sure it will all work out.

Hang in there and keep thinking of your baby to be!



Status: Offline
 
Old May 5th, 2010, 05:10 AM   5
Barbles
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Cornwall
Posts: 2,518
I have a feeling I'll be in this situation, Ive always wanted lots of children but for house/money reasons that wouldnt have been possible but we could comfortably fit three in our new house. I am WTT for my second at the moment, OH is not really enthusiastic about it but he is the type that once the baby is actually here, he will get excited, he finds it hard to get excited about stuff that isnt happening yet.
He keeps saying that once we have the second it isnt going to take long for me to start asking for just 'one more'. I keep saying I wont but who knows? I think if we most definatly didnt have the room I would be ok but I know there is the spare room (planning to make playroom then office when the kids are older) so if it did happen it wouldnt be the worst.
He says he's having the snip after the second anyways but does this longing for more children ever go away? I didnt even like being pregnant lols (I was not a glowing and blooming person, more like the life was sucked out of me. I looked better 2 days after I gave birth )



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 5th, 2010, 05:57 AM   6
babyblog
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 3,291
This is something i think i will face! We have agreed that we will try for another baby, probably next year but my OH is adamant he wants only 2.

I only have one brother, he has one sister and think it is because that is what he knows. I was speaking to my mum about this yesterday and she was making me really thnk about it.She said she would have liked to have had 3 children, but was so busy with my bro and me that they didn't get around to it. She also agreed with some of the points my OH made-children deman alot of time, and perhaps it is nicer to share that 2 ways rather than 3.My parents have also helped me and my bro out alot when growing up-they bougth us both cars and helped towards uni costs, they have also given us both money towards our houses.I know this is a luxury-not a necssary but it did make me think actually i would like to do the same for my children so perhaps 2 is better than 3! Also things like holidays or days out, family tickets are generally 2 adults and 2 kids, would have to get a bigger car with three children.

As you can see i'm having to convince myself!

I realy don't think there is much you can do to convince your partner, if they only want 2 then i guess that is to be respected. However, i wonder if time will help-i think what i'll do is have a sceond baby (hopefully) and then be happy with that.If in a few years, i find myself reallt broody i may raise the subject when the older two are at school?

How old are your children by the way?



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 5th, 2010, 17:23 PM   7
Belle
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Birmingham
Posts: 3,542
Mamabel! Therapy is what i feel i need! Its getting soooo bad now! My life just does not feel complete, i just can see myself with 3!
Babyblog, my husband says all the things you have about families of 2 children are better off etc but still this does not budge my feelings! My children are 5 1/2 and 19months. Despite the 4year age gap between them they are very close but i just feel i want 1 sooner and not have such a big age gap.



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 7th, 2010, 16:38 PM   8
babyblog
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Posts: 3,291
I hope you workl things out your way !



 
Status: Offline
 
Old May 7th, 2010, 16:42 PM   9
CandyApple19
Trying to conceive (TTC)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: West Yorkshire, Batley
Posts: 9,376
Ben is the same, he said to me, "when we're ready for another baby (this means when he makes up his mind..) we're NTNP. Now having come off the depo he was still in that frame of mind but cause my body isnt co operating with me like i need it to were holding off til further notice....



 
Status: Offline
 
Old Feb 23rd, 2012, 09:49 AM   10
rebecca_2012
Mum (Mom)
New BnB member
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Posts: 1

convcing my partner


i have a little boy whos four and been trying to convice my partner to have another baby for the last year and he keeps on ssaying no that we should wait another 5 years and i dont want to wait so any ideas please



Status: Offline
 
Reply



Bookmarks

Tags
baby , convince , hubby

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search






SEO by vBSEO