Forum Rules


Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Search this Thread
Old Mar 2nd, 2011, 17:23 PM   1
ChewyCookie
Waiting To Try (WTT)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Location: UK
Posts: 87

Any younger women WTT?


I just turned 20, and DF is 23. I'm a full-time student atm, but DF is an accountant, and is quite confident that we can afford a baby and for me to be a SAHM. I plan on running a cake business from home for some extra money, too.

We have discussed children etc and both want at least 4 kids. We have both been wanting marriage and babies for a long time. However, we are both Christian and want to be married with a house (hopefully mortgage) before TTC.

Now, when I told my mum and my family about this, they all seemed shocked and said that I'm for too young to even consider getting marred, let alone having kids. My Fiance's mum and family are very happy and can't wait to be a grandmother. I'm just a bit gutted about my mum's reaction, especially since DF and his family have been so supportive from the very beginning.

How can I convince my mum that I'm 'ready'?



Status: Offline
 
Old Mar 2nd, 2011, 17:34 PM   2
rainbows_x
Mum (Mom)
BnB Elite
 
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 11,696
Hi hun, I'm 20 & OH is 28. We already have a little girl, and are WTT in 2015.
We never really mentioned anything to our families until I was actually pregnant, they were all thrilled.

You shouldn't have to convince your mum you are ready, you will prove it to her when your pregnant & have you baby xx



 
Status: Offline
 
Old Mar 2nd, 2011, 20:12 PM   3
Samstah33
Trying to conceive (TTC)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 142
I'm 22 and trying to concieve!! Well this is my first month. My boyfriend is 30 and has his masters degree and a good job!! I'm a full time student and working part time!! so i am in the same situation as you. My parents are huge on getting married and making sure that I am finanicially set before having a child. and his parents are so excited and cant wait for us to get pregnant!

So I'm struggling with you!!



Status: Offline
 
Old Mar 3rd, 2011, 01:11 AM   4
Josefin
Mum (Mom)
Active BnB Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 692
Hi! I'm 20 and I'm WTT #2 in May. I have a son born in June 2010 I'm also getting married this year. My family was happy about the pregnancy but my OHs family was not that happy but they changed I really don't think you are too young to get married You know best yourself. Don't listen to other people, just follow your heart Good luck!



 
Status: Offline
 
Old Mar 3rd, 2011, 01:29 AM   5
JelloPanda
Mum (Mom)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Location: not far enough away from her craziness
Posts: 10
I'm 18 and WTT



 
Status: Offline
 
Old Mar 3rd, 2011, 03:07 AM   6
Nimoo
Pregnant (Expecting)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 961
i am 19 wtt for #2, which wont be for a very long time i am a stay at home mummy which suits us perfectly we are very financially stable and our lil man doesnt ever go with out hes always got the latest clothes and trainer DH is obsessed with shopping at footlocker for him plus thats the only place that do half size trainers for his fussy feet!! my point is its not true that young parents kids go without, tbh ive not had any negative comment off anyone yet! my mum had to accept my pregnancy as in our religion abortion is a big no no!! and one last thing i got married at 16 nearly 17 yes i know young but no regrets here weve been together since dec 2005!! your never too young for love!

wow i rambel alot lmao oops



Status: Offline
 
Old Mar 3rd, 2011, 04:00 AM   7
BlaireUK
Mum (Mom)
BnB Elite
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 10,654
Neither of you should have to prove to anyone that you are ready. If you have discussed it and understand what's involved (in so much as you can) then I think you have approached it in a very mature manner. You say you want to get married and have a house before you start trying so I'm sure once your Mum realises that you have thought about this carefully and you are both making sure you are prepared to bring a baby into the world she'll feel differently.

Good luck!



 
Status: Offline
 
Old Mar 3rd, 2011, 04:18 AM   8
Nimoo
Pregnant (Expecting)
Active BnB Member
 
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: UK
Posts: 961
i agree with blaireUK the most important things you need before the arrival of a LO is to be comfortable financially and have your own place and to be living together for a while so you can have a feel of what its like to be together in your own home!!

hope all goes well im sure your mum will see your using your head!!



Status: Offline
 
Old Mar 3rd, 2011, 04:37 AM   9
Smile181c
Mum (Mom)
BnB Elite
 
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Worcestershire, England
Posts: 10,881
Hey I'm 19 (20 in May) and OH is 20 (21 in June) and we are WTT until we have a mortgage and are married before TTC. It's taken me a while to realise that I want to be married and have a stable home (we live in a house atm but it's rented ) as I was just so blinded by the fact I wanted a baby (I get really broody haha). OH has finally managed to talk some sense into me

We haven't told our families what we've discussed about TTC as we feel it's our business. If we feel ready then we'll TTC, if not we'll wait a bit longer. They do know that OH is planning to propose to me this year and we'll be getting married next year or the year after. I think they've just assumed that babies will naturally follow. They aren't as supportive about TTC as they are about marriage as like your parents, they feel we're too young. One of the reasons we don't bring it up around them.

I don't think you need to prove yourself to them though. If you and your OH are sure about what you want then I say go for it once you're ready Sorry about my essay :P I'm just kind of in the same boat xxx



 
Status: Offline
 
Old Mar 3rd, 2011, 04:55 AM   10
Shabutie
Mum (Mom)
BnB Addict
 
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: Havant, Hampshire
Posts: 3,399
Hi,

Im 21 and OH is 23. We are getting married in 6 months time, and have just had a little girl 9 weeks ago.

My family are supportive in our relationship and getting married whereas OH's isnt. They think he is making a mistake and that he is too young to even know what love is. I have found that it is wasted time trying to get them to come round to our way of thinking. I had a miscarriage before we had Amara, which wasnt planned. Both sides of the family were gutted as they atleast wanted us to be marrie first (and I had just started uni at the time) I then got pregnant with Amara and left uni and my family were excited as they understood why we got pregnant again before getting married (I got depressed over the miscarriage) whereas OH's family only came round to the idea when Amara was born, which I think was too latre by then.

The only real advise I have for you is, dont try and convince your mum that you are ready to start a family, you shouldnt have to. Like you have said, you and OH can provide for the LO so there is no financial pressure on your mum. Best way is to do what you and OH want, and when you have a LO you can show that you have made the right decision and you were ready.

I just wanted you to know your not alone with this situation. I may have waffeled a bit, sorry.

ETA: When is anyone ready really? you may have preconcieved ideas of what motherhood and family life is like, but there are aspects that take you by suprise, but you just cope, no matter what. That shows you are ready. xXx





 
Status: Offline
 
Reply



Bookmarks

Tags
women , wtt , younger

Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search



SEO by vBSEO