"Feminism" is just a label in my mind, I work and have a baby because I enjoy working but also want to be a mother, not because I see it as my 'feminist right', I work for the same reasons my husband does- because I like it and we need the money, if I take time to be a SAHM in the future that is because it is what is right for our family at that time, not because I am living to anyone else's 'ideals'. Basically, I will do what I want when I want, because I can
I think the idea that your degree would in some way be 'wasted' just because you are a stay at home mom is ridiculous. What you learn in university and how you learn changes the way you think so dramatically (at least for me). I feel at the end of the day it only gives you more knowledge to share with your children, which is ultimately a good thing.
I think it's great that we are living in a world where a woman can get an education, have a career, and have children.
That being said, I am a SAHM to my daughter because I chose to be. I really love working at home, spending my day with my LO, and raising her myself. I plan on having two children, any by the time they are school age, I will go back to work and work on getting my education, simply because that is what would be easiest for me. There are ladies who can raise toddlers and get their education, and kudos to them for that, but I personally feel it would be way too much on my plate, I wouldn't be able to handle all that and keep my sanity at the same time, but again, that's just me.
For some, being a SAHM is a luxury that other's can't afford. I've seen a few ladies on here that have to work in order to make a living when what they really want is to be at home all day with their LO's and I think that is really sad that they can't do that. I also feel very lucky that I can.
I try not to worry about stereo types and labels, I mean, if I am a typical mother staying at home raising the kids, fine with me, and if I'm not, whatever, that's fine too. The opinions of others don't affect me at all, as long as I am happy with my life, and I am. I never feel obligated to do something, I do it because I WANT to.
Anyway, sorry for the rant, but that's my 2 cents on the matter
This took me quite a while to come to terms with myself and sometimes I still have blips! Having recently completed my degree part time whilst working full time I felt I should be embarking on some amazing career. However, deep down what I knew would make me happy was starting a family with my partner.
I believe we should embrace the fact that women have a choice and if its your choice to start a family and even be a stay at home mum you should be proud of it!
I kind of feel like this. When I was younger I always thought about my career, but now I honestly have no idea what career I'd like to do. I'd love to go to university, but in the current economic climate it just seems so pointless to me (unless doing a very specific career based degree) as most of the people I've worked with have degrees, yet I'm in the same place as them. I wouldn't want to go, spend 3 years on it and end up in a lot of debt, only to end up in the same job as I have now. As I've got a bit older, I really do love the idea of having kids and being a SAHM. But I feel a lot of pressure as I earn more than my OH and I feel like being the one with more education, I should be the one that's the earner.
I used to feel like this a few years ago (I'm nearly 26). My mum brought me up to believe that the right thing to do is to go to university, then get a "good" job in a big city, work your way up the career ladder until you earn the big bucks, then settle down after you're 30 - and maybe even not have children. I thought this was the way it had to be for a long time. My priorities have been slowly changing over the last few years - I used to want to furthers career before having a baby and wait til I was much older, whereas now I'm much more relaxed about how I lead my life. I won't follow my mum's example - she told me she all but regrets having me and my brother, and constantly wanted to be at work more than she wanted to be with us. So although her ideas are ingrained in me I'm fighting them - I used to want to be a career woman - now all I want is to be a mother
Women's rights- to me that means a woman can do whatever she wants and be a strong, confident and inspirational figure in her chosen line of work- why can't this include being a stay at home mum??? If it is your choice then that is your right and it is your right not to be judged. I am a professional who is now a stay at home mum- I resigned out of choice and I feel privileged to be in a position to be a SAHM. However the opinions and judgements of others I faced quite frankly made me sick- I was made to feel like I was letting women everywhere down by not conforming to this feminist culture. Well I'm sorry but raising my child is important to me- I don't want someone else doing it for me, I don't want to miss out on seeing my baby grow and achieve. So many women have no choice financially and have to return to work, I feel incredibly lucky and empowered to be able to choose and I really couldn't care less if anyone thought less of me for that. I won't apologise for giving my child my time- it is the most precious gift in the world, more fool the people who don't realise that.
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