How can I get my son to fall asleep without nursing?
This will be a bit lengthy (sorry) but I really need some advice!
My son is 14 months old and has been nursing to sleep since he was born for naps and bed time but I think its time to change this. I'm planning to have him weaned at 18 months, and I'm also expecting our 2nd child 3 months later in October. I love nursing my son and I know he's going to be a hard one to wean but I don't want to be tandem nursing and I really think its affecting his sleeping and eating habits. My son is pretty much addicted to his boob, he still wakes up atleast once at night and I do think it has something to do with the nursing, and that is the only way he will go back to sleep too. He doesn't eat much but he is a snacker. I don't offer him to nurse anymore I wait for him to signal he wants it, which is increasing more now. I have tried offering something else in place but he usually only has a couple bites of whatever it is and then still wants to nurse.
Does anyone have any gradual ways to wean from nursing to sleep? I mean I dont mind a night time feeding infact I want the bed time nursing to be the last we ditch but I would like to stop before he falls asleep. I've tried detaching him as he gets drowsy but 9 times out of 10 he goes right back for it and if I move the boob away so he can't get to it he cries until you give it back, and if you don't he will wake up and the whole process starts over again, and he'll take forever to fall asleep!
I tried a sippy cup of milk, he will drink it all and still want to nurse. He never would take a pacifier (and obviously I don't want to enforce that now if he never was interested anyway).
I just don't know what to do =/ The only way I can see to do this is is by letting him cry for 2 or 3 hours until he falls asleep and I am very anti cry it out so that will not be happening! I don't want to start any new habits that will be hard to break either.
We do try and stick to a routine of dinner, bath, brushing teeth and letting him play for a few minutes right before putting him down but if I can get him to be ok with not falling asleep on the boob I am considering reading him a book after nursing or something..just something to fill the gap but he won't stay in his bed =/ I know this is going to take patience and consistency..
My husband works nights most days so he only has 2 or 3 days a week when he is home at night. I have on occassion left my son with his dad if I was too tired to stay up and told him to wake me up if the kid needs me. But he never does. He always just cuddles up next to his dad on the couch while he was watching tv and passed out. I wish I had it that easy!
If anyone has any advice or ideas on how to get my son to sleep without the boob please help me!
Oh hon, sounds like a tough one. Maybe try posting in the breastfeeding section to get experienced mums opinions?
As it is, you can see my LO is only 6mths and although he used to fall asleep to boob he now generally self settles in his cot (just started doing it at 5mths out of the blue). He does need boob when he wakes in the night though...
If your LO is settling for his dad, suggests it really is a habit thing and not hunger....so not much help with advice for you there I'm afraid. If both of you are present at bedtime does he still cry for boob? What about doing the bedtime feed in a different room so he has to be carried through to bed and could maybe have a story then? Or would he just cry for boob before sleeping again....?
Sorry I can't be more help - def re post in bf section
Maybe your milk tastes different and he can sense something is different (your pregnancy) so he is really wanting comfort from you? If it is just comfort nursing I think it will be harder to stop. I have a snacker too who comfort nurses and never liked a pacifier, so I kinda understand!
I usually go to kellymom.com when I have a question about nursing and here is a link
Mine still nurses to sleep too so I don't really know, but since he settles with his daddy, is there any way you can slowly move bedtime or naptimes so more are when your OH is home and he can settle your LO? I would think that the more often he settles without you the more he will get used to it.
Sorry I have no better advice! Good luck though, and congrats on your new LO-to-be!
I wish I could but hubby works from 7 pm to 7 am so no can do there.. :/ but hes always wantedvthe comfort even before I got pregnant, so I don't think thats the problem. Hes very attached to me though so I know this will be difficult i'll try the breastfeeding forum tomorrow
I know you said you are not in favor of crying but just on my end, what I did last week and it seems to have worked wonders was nurse and then detach her while she was still awake and just lay there and comfort her as she complain cried (it wasn't hysterical crying, if you know what I mean). She took about an hour to fall asleep the first night, crying on and off, 30 min the second night and ever since then she has been falling asleep on her own, not a peep, smiling sometime even. Mind you, we cosleep, so I was/am right there the whole time. And I do think there is different kinds of crying. I never let her get really upset, she was just unhappy at the change and had to figure out what to do now.
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