11 year olds on facebook

[Foogirl]

I just wondered what you ladies thought of "tweenies" using Facebook.

My nephew is eleven and pretty much all of his classmates have a page on facebook. My sister refuses to let her son have one as first of all it is against their rules, but also because he is too young to appreciate the dangers of the internet.

She does talk to him and educate him about what to do and what not to do but she feels there is no need for him to be on Facebook. His friends obviously tease him about it, but he does understand why he doesn't have it.

My sister is more annoyed that the parents let it happen, in fact one of the lads in the class is a policeman's son and he is happy enough to let that happen.

Is she wrong? Do any of the mums here think Facebook is acceptable for eleven year olds?

 

[Boony]

my niece and nephew have it they are 6 and 7!!!! and i think its ridiculous theres so much stuff on facebook that they shoudnt be able to see. for example my niece joined a group called 'hunni dont flatter yourself he's desperate and you're easy' now i'm sorry but she is 6 years old!!! and her mother thinks shes monitoring it! Thats been on her profie for at least a month now!

IMHO facebook has a age limit for a reason if you have to lie about your age to be on it then you shouldnt be on it!

 

[expecting09]

My sisters are 11 + 9 and they both have facebook. The 9 year old only has family as her friends on there and shes only allowed to use it for the games (farmville etc). Since the 11 year old started secondary school shes had her mates added, she doesn't have any pictures either and our dad has told them what they can and can't do, they mostly use it to play the games and dad checks after every time they've been on to see what they've been doing.

I think if there is an understanding about what they use it for it's ok. But IF they started to join groups, have 'randoms' add them and stuff it should be stopped

 

[Cariad_bach]

I think it depends entirely on the parents TBH ..

..If there's a mum/dad in the background all the time monitoring, checking, keeping a very very close watch then Facebooks fine for 11+ keeping in touch with Grandparents and family.
(i wouldnt let my 7 year old loose on it!!)

But the Internet especially 'social networking' webbies are a gateway to hell if your not careful.

Even adults add the wrong people and fall out etc on there so you have to be careful.

 

[sabby52]

Dec is 12 and he has had a Facebook for ages now, I have set all his privacy setting so if someone searches his name it is very unlikely they will find him. He doesnt accept friend requests unless he knows the person and if he is a bit weary he will always come to me He is very mature for 12 and he has his head screwed on so I dont mind him having one.

 

[AP]

I dont think its acceptable. Its an open online playground for bullying and paedophiles

 

[Jkelmum]

Katie is 10 and as facebook only has family on there and plays the games ..her name isnt her name either

 

[kiwimama]

IF i let my child on there at 10 or 11 I'd be monitoring it VERY closely..

 

[AP]

Katie is 10 and as facebook only has family on there and plays the games ..her name isnt her name either

thats a good idea

 

[Weeplin]

I will not be letting my daughter (or son when the time comes) join Facebook(or any other profile/chat site). Not even for family and schoolfriends only.

These sites have a minmum age for a reason and even under what you would regard as safe with only family and friends is still an access point for internet predators.

My daughter will be getting her own computer this year with the internet but I will be buying a net nanny and her connection will be monitored until she is mature and educated enough to understand the dangers herself.

I just feel the risk is too high to take any chances even if you think it must be safe. Better to be 100% safe and sure than sorry.

 

[Foogirl]

my niece and nephew have it they are 6 and 7!!!!

I'm not so bothered about very young children having a page created by their parents. A few on here have done it for their babies. At 6 and 7, I suppose it would be fine if the parents have the password and the children cannot access it without the parents present.

My concern is that too many seem to think facebook is a safe activity. Unfortunately by it's nature it is very unsafe. Parental control software, net nanny etc is absolutely no use on facebook and the likes.

I'm just not sure an 11 year old is capable of grasping the dangers.

 

[Boony]

my niece and nephew have it they are 6 and 7!!!!

I'm not so bothered about very young children having a page created by their parents. A few on here have done it for their babies. At 6 and 7, I suppose it would be fine if the parents have the password and the children cannot access it without the parents present.

My concern is that too many seem to think facebook is a safe activity. Unfortunately by it's nature it is very unsafe. Parental control software, net nanny etc is absolutely no use on facebook and the likes.

I'm just not sure an 11 year old is capable of grasping the dangers.

I understand what you are saying but my niece and nephew have their own laptop each! and both of them can be on it at the same time so i'm not sure how their mother can monitor them both appropriately at the same time. If she was then my niece wouldnt have joined the group that she did! I personnally dont agree with them having laptop each to themselves at their age either but each to their own i guess

 

[Jo]

I gave in to Emily about it after a lot of very serious thought.
Before facebook changed their settings I locked it down incredibly tight, no one could add her she had to add them.
I have altered them again so she is not easy to find, if I put in her email adress she does not show up anywhere.

She is monitered very closely on it and does not even know her own password, I go one and delete people, pages and applications and she knows they are my rules and not to question what I do.

Emily has had it drilled into her from a young age that people on the net are not always who they say they are, I have even told her examples of fakers on here to show that adults can be deceived as well.

I really did battle with myself before I set her an account up, but I trust her and she is sensible and as I said ground rules were set before I did it, I did feely Iffy about the 13yr old rule but TBH peer pressure had a hell of a lot to do with It.

I do feel 6&7 is rather young for it as they cannot understand the dangers as well as an 11 yr old, it all depends on the child, some are mature and some are not, it is the parents call, but it should be monitered very closely.

Emily does not have her own PC she has to use the family one or mine and OH laptops, that ay we can see exactly where she has been and what she is doing.

I also save all her MSN convo's to reveiw

 

[Weeplin]

my niece and nephew have it they are 6 and 7!!!!

My concern is that too many seem to think facebook is a safe activity. Unfortunately by it's nature it is very unsafe. Parental control software, net nanny etc is absolutely no use on facebook and the likes.

I'm just not sure an 11 year old is capable of grasping the dangers.

I agree, which is why it is best to completely block these sites which is what I will be doing. I am pretty sure though that net nanny has a site filter and blocking function. Net Nanny Standout Features:

* SSL Filtering (not just blocking)
* IM monitoring
* Facebook reporting, filtering, and/or blocking
* PC game blocking
* Block proxy (work-around) sites

 

[summerarmahni]

my cousins got it shes 9 i dont agree as there are so many application to do with sex,violence,swearing etc, so if i was to do a quiz on sex as shes on my friend list it would show up on hers if you get what i mean theres an age limit for a reason x

 

[nievesmama]

I set one up for Tillie last year, she was nearly 12. We had to flee our home town, so it was her only way of contacting friends and her paternal family. I maxed her settings, and she was only allowed on it when i was around.
I have since permanently deleted her account, due to new friends from school bullying her. Yet Facebook did nothing.
i dont even have it anymore tbh, its to much hassle sometimes for an adult, but i wont let my kids have it again.

 

[WhosThatGirl]

My almost 11 year old has one. But he only has family on it, and his best friend who is his age. He also is not allowed to have pictures of himself on it.. though I did allow one of him wearing his spooky halloween mask he still uses that as his default. His page is private except to his friends list who are all family and 1 friend. I check his page often, but really all he does is play the games on there (cafe world, farmville, ect) and he never even really posts on anybodys walls or anything unless its like a game invitation or free stuff from the game (like in cafe world you can give your friends free food). So I think if its monitored it is totally fine.

 

[LaDY]

It depends really. My 11 year old niece is on there and im not happy with it at all...she has these provocative, 'sexy' pics on with tonnes of makeup on...no way does she look her age...she looks tonnes older...and from the looks of it she adds random people!...she has 1000s of friends! Even when i say something to her mum i get the cold shoulder! So its upto the parents. I personally dont think i would be happy with it xx

 

[Foogirl]

Oh don't get me started on children with their own PCs and tvs and sky boxes etc. I might just lose some friends!

I agree, which is why it is best to completely block these sites which is what I will be doing. I am pretty sure though that net nanny has a site filter and blocking function. Net Nanny Standout Features:

* SSL Filtering (not just blocking)
* IM monitoring
* Facebook reporting, filtering, and/or blocking
* PC game blocking
* Block proxy (work-around) sites

Of course, you can block any site with Net Nanny. What I meant was, people can often install it thinking it will stop anything dodgy. It won't filter out the nasties within the site and children will potentially access some dodgy stuff. And parents sit back "safe" in the knowledge they have parental restrictions.

I gave in to Emily about it after a lot of very serious thought.

It sounds like you are taking a very good approach to it. I wish more parents would do the same.

If does help, of course, if you are internet savvy yourself!!

 

[moomin_troll]

i havent read the whole thread so i might be repeating some else but i dont think children should have a facebook whether it was created by them or their parents.

i didnt have any of these things like fb, myspace ect till i was 16 and was old enough to actualy understand the dangers. this wasnt because of my mum it was my own choice i had better things to do then sit infront of a computer.

i dont think ile be letting zane have any profile on the internet till hes around 15