:(

[Lady_Bee]

Well it's 4 am and my husband isn't home. He hasn't called me or texted me.
It was supposed to be his night watching Alexander.

Instead he is.......???????? Don't even know.

So goddamned hurt right now. Sorry ladies I just need to vent.

I feel like if he couldn't even spare me a thought to give me a heads up that he wasn't coming home why the hell am I even here. I feel like nobody, don't I even matter? He told me yesterday I'm basically a roommate and a nanny, all I do is watch Alexander and cook (soooooo far from the truth ). Add to that his non-appearance, and I feel kind of like shit tonight.

 

[corgankidd]

Aw I'm sorry What a dick!

I hope you tear him a new one when he gets home!
But really, you need to have a real conversation about this. He needs to know treating you this way and ditching his son is unacceptable.

 

[Lady_Bee]

I know right. I have a feeling all he will do is avoid me because I'm "mad at him". He is terrible at apologies, I doubt I'll get one.

 

[MiniKiwi]

Aww I am so sorry, that is so unfair. I've got no helpful advice, just lots of I hope you two can sort things out

 

[bananaz]

I'm sorry, that's really unacceptable. I hope for your sake that he has a damn good excuse.

 

[shmoo75]

to you hun. I am so sorry your husband is being a right ahole right now. I think when he does make an appearance you need to be having some serious words with him. To find out why does he feel the way he does and doesn't his wife and child mean anything to him or does he even love you both. If he answers no any or all of the above I would seriously consider either you and LO leaving or, telling him to pack a bag and stay the hell out of your lives. I hope you can work through it as, I hate to see family's break up but, its a sad fact that a lot of relationships break up due to the stress and strains of having a baby

 

[superfrizbee]

to you hun. I am so sorry your husband is being a right ahole right now. I think when he does make an appearance you need to be having some serious words with him. To find out why does he feel the way he does and doesn't his wife and child mean anything to him or does he even love you both. If he answers no any or all of the above I would seriously consider either you and LO leaving or, telling him to pack a bag and stay the hell out of your lives. I hope you can work through it as, I hate to see family's break up but, its a sad fact that a lot of relationships break up due to the stress and strains of having a baby

Wss! It is not acceptable to be spoken to or rreated like this and if he doesn't change his ways I'd be packing his bags. Hope you're ok!

 

[Lady_Bee]

Thanks for the hugs, I need them! I can't even go back to sleep I am so worked up about this. I just don't understand why he couldn't give me a courtesy text. I think that is the worst thing about it. To me there is NEVER a good reason not to consider your spouse and let them know what you are doing! Just really poor of him. He'd better be blind drunk on someone's sofa. I'd be livid about that too but it's better than some other possibilities. I feel so lonely and angry right now I am dreading talking to him about it because somehow he always turns everything around on me.

 

[MiniKiwi]

When he gets in, can you try and keep calm? Yelling or fighting won't do any good. Can you think what needs to change? Why is he not coming home (though there's no excuse for that!)? You need to work to fix things or it sounds like they're soon ruined

 

[baby287]

Hugs hun. men think so differently than we do. They can be so immature and inconsiderate. Maybe some counseling would help. Good luck try to stay calm

 

[Lady_Bee]

Counseling I think is a great idea if things don't go well tomorrow.

 

[Lisa40]

Oh my god, I'd kill him! Hope he had a bloody good excuse or is doing some serious grovelling!

I have words with my OH if he's even 10 minutes later than he said he'd be unless he text obviously. I just tell him that I worry.

He's now started adding 30 minutes on to his expected times so he's always early

But there's no way you should be treated like that, especially if you'd arranged for him to look after LO

Did you text him at all to find out where he was?
xx

 

[Lady_Bee]

He rolled in at 9 this morning. Bunch of excuses, phone died, left charger in car which he left somewhere so he could go drinking. Hmm, could have and SHOULD have texted me from his car before he went skipping off to the bar then! That would have been the courteous thing to do, to let me know while he was still able to that his plans had changed. From what he told me it was just a dinner thing that would be over about 21:30. Yeah right. He hitched a lift to a bar, got blind drunk and spent the night on a friend's sofa.

Still annoyed. I just feel like it's a matter of common courtesy really if you love and respect your spouse. Oh well. He is now sleeping off a hangover. I am so not impressed. No sympathy.

 

[Lady_Bee]

Oh my god, I'd kill him! Hope he had a bloody good excuse or is doing some serious grovelling!

I have words with my OH if he's even 10 minutes later than he said he'd be unless he text obviously. I just tell him that I worry.

He's now started adding 30 minutes on to his expected times so he's always early

But there's no way you should be treated like that, especially if you'd arranged for him to look after LO

Did you text him at all to find out where he was?
xx

Oh I tried to call several times and just got voicemail. I left him some lovely messages from my flipping-out-at-4am self. plus a Facebook email for good measure telling him that I am very hurt and need an apology!

I think he's just thoughtless really. We used to have issues with him never telling me if he was going to be late home from work. It took ages for him to get it... He just didn't understand why I needed to know if he wasn't going to be home for dinner! I found it soooooo frustrating. He is a little better about that now but in general is awful at keeping me informed of his plans.

 

[greats]

I'm not going to lie, I'm quite blunt about these types of situations b/c my parents used to do this kind of thing to each other all the time, but if my husband ever pulled that kind of thing on me, he'd be hit with divorce papers so fast he wouldn't know how to breathe anymore! No woman let alone the mother of his child! should have to put up with that kind of behavior. He is a husband and a father, not a damn college student who has no responsibilities in life. Time to grow up, ya know?

 

[Lisa40]

You know what I'd do... A bit mean but effective.

Next time he goes to work & you have somewhere to go, pack up some stuff & just go & stay somewhere overnight with LO, even if it has to be a hotel.

Don't leave a note & switch off your phone so he can't get hold of you. He will soon get the idea that its very worrying that you have no idea where your partner is & if he doesn't get it after that then I think he's a lost cause to be honest.

Good luck
xx

 

[baby287]

How frustrating! Men suck.

 

[socitycourty]

 

[Lisa40]

Ooorrrrr, if you can't stay out anywhere, When he wakes up from his hangover, tell him you've forgotten something from the shops & you'll be 10 minutes... Then go & visit a few friends, go for dinner & go back later on when he's had to sort LO & the dinner etc.

He hopefully would get the picture then!

 

[TwilightAgain]

Oh my god, I'd kill him! Hope he had a bloody good excuse or is doing some serious grovelling!

I have words with my OH if he's even 10 minutes later than he said he'd be unless he text obviously. I just tell him that I worry.

He's now started adding 30 minutes on to his expected times so he's always early

But there's no way you should be treated like that, especially if you'd arranged for him to look after LO

Did you text him at all to find out where he was?
xx

this made me laugh! I go gaga if my OH is late, does my head in. Bless him, he has got so much better at being on time now though thanks to my nagging. Though if I ask him to meet me at a certain time, I always schedule it for 30mins later so I won't be too mad if he's late and if I say come over for around 5-6, he turns up bang on 6 always at he last minute ha ha!

Sorry your OP is being such a douche OP. Go around the house making as much noise as you can! you don't deserve to be treated like this.