A few poems i've written

I wrote the following poems and thought that some of you might be able to relate to them and that they may even help you:

1.
From the moment we met, we knew we were meant for each other
We knew that someday he would want to be a father and I’d want to be a mother
We spent our first 4 years loving, talking and sharing
No matter what we went through we nurtured each other; caring

We had happy times, bad times, sad times, great times; a life together
No matter how big the storm; with each other we would weather
We were so close, we could face anything with each other, so in love
So strong, compassionate, sensitive, together we could rise above

We decided the time had come to turn the 2 of us into 3
We were so excited and happy to extend our family tree
We would buy things for the baby, little clothes and little toys
We even picked mutual colours to suit little girls or little boys

We were disappointed the first month, we thought it would happen right away
But we were sure after a little more trying we’d get a positive any day
So we kept trying and waiting…the months kept going by
Feeling devastated after every failed month and together we wondered why

We tried charts, tests, kits and all the natural things
But it didn’t make a difference, the disappointment again would ring
We wondered why it took so long when we were doing everything right
We would lay awake with these thoughts deep into the night

Family and friends fell pregnant as we continued to try
Oh how we tried to be happy for them, but instead we would sit and cry
We would cry for what we didn’t have and what may never come
And everytime we saw pregnant women or babies we would suddenly feel very numb

We decided to get some tests, hoping we would be ok
But we weren’t prepared for our results and what the nurse would say
Reduced mobility were the words, I didn’t quite understand
What exactly this meant and how much we needed a hand

We endured tests and questions we were so nervous and so scared
We just couldn’t speak to our loved ones even though we knew they cared
We still don’t know what will be though we will continue to try
And the only thing I know for sure is that with each failure, together we’ll cry

We won’t give up on a baby, it is our wholesome hope and dream
And until we have our baby the tears will always stream
If you’re up there little baby, please come see us soon
For we need you to be with us even more than the night sky needs the moon

2.
Our infertility cannot be seen
But we feel it everyday
The hurt the anguish and despair
Doesn’t go away

We are grieving all the time
For something we never had
I never thought that was possible
To lose something that was never there – to feel so sad

We hate to feel this way
We hate to cry these tears
We hate to wonder how long this will take
Will it be months or years?

It kills us to see other families
It’s a reminder of what we aren’t
We should smile for them and be happy
But we just can’t

It hurts us to listen to parents
Saying a crying baby is the pits
We should be so lucky to have a crying baby
We wouldn’t mind a bit

We would sit and admire our baby
This amazing thing that we created
We would embrace this baby with so much love
And talk about how long for this we had waited

We wouldn’t mind the dirty nappies
Or the many sleepless nights
We would just be grateful to have our bundle
That we would hold so tight

We wouldn’t complain about feeding
Or having our lives turned upside down
Nothing could get rid of our smiles
From having our baby around

We hope the wait is over soon
And that our baby will be here
Then the day will come
That we can finally shed happy tears