AARRGHH!! Nasty doctor rant! :'( am i over reacting here?

Discussion in 'Miscarriage Support' started by tootsy1987, Apr 27, 2009.

  1. tootsy1987

    tootsy1987 Abbi and Alfie - My World

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    :cry::cry::cry::cry::cry:

    Well... as some of you probably know i found a lump on my cervix on friday so i was making an appt to see my doctor today, well at my doctor surgery there are 2 female doctors, one is lovely and so understanding, the other is a horrible witch!!! guess which one i got!???

    The nice doc was on hols this week and i couldnt wait that long to be seen so i just took the appt with the miserable old :witch: (shes about 50 years old).

    Well i went in and AGAIN! had to explain that i had a miscarriage!(3rd time... do these people not talk or read??!) So she went oh no! she said what happened then so i explained i went for private scan for reasurrance and they found a baby with no heartbeat so i went to a and e and was sent for erpc the following day. She said well what did the hospital scan say? i said i fought and fought but they said they didnt need to re-scan me! she went hmmmm! then i told her about my lump i found and she said, right get on the bed and we shall have a look, as i was undressing she walked in and just looked at me standing in my underwear, she went ''whats your bmi these days''? i said erm when i went for op i think it was 27 :blush: she went hmmm! then she took some swabs as she thinks i have an infec as there was alot of discharge (sorry tmi!) altho i couldnt bare to tell her i have been having unprotected sex as i would have been slated as she said under no circumstances have unprotected sex for THREE months!! like say what???:hissy:

    Anyway i asked for a smear and she agreed no problem at all (thats the part i thought i would have to fight with!) so i had smear and swabs and had to give in a urine sample. So we go and sit down and she says... the reason you are miscarrying is cause your SO! overweight! you really need to drastically reduce your weight and you WILL (like she can read the future!!) have a viable pregnancy! (i will attach a pic of me below... im a size 14!!!:hissy::hissy:) She said also i should NEVER EVER have had an ERPC as she said there was 2 reasons, either i had aborted a perfectly healthy baby that the hb was just hiding, she said EVERYONE knows that it can be difficult to see a hb at the dates i was!! or...... she said if they didnt rescan you then there must have been a certain way of telling the pregnancy wasnt viable i.e. there wasnt a faetus present and just the sac!! i said ''i saw the faetus, it was a perfect size just floating lifeless with no hb :hissy:'' ''also i read the notes that said they removed a 10 wk old faetus'' she said well then u have aborted a healthy baby :hissy::hissy::cry: and you have NO right to say you have had a missed m/c as thats not what you have had!

    OMG!!! i could have screamed, cried, smacked, cried and screamed some more!!!!! OMG who is she!!!!! she said i should have just let things happen naturally as then i would know the pregnancy wasnt viable.

    She said what happens next then? (i was like aint u supposed to tell me that!) i replied well i have the appt at the fertility clinic on thursday. ''FERTILITY CLINIC!! seriously! you shouldnt be going down that route, your far tooo young, its just your weight, your using up nhs resources that you dont need and wasting peoples time!!!!'' OMG :cry: i cant do anything right, even thought i wass her colleague who referred me there as i have had 3 m/c's...

    So then.... the penultimut insult!!!!!

    She pulls out a FAT CAMP brochure and says.... have a look at that, i recommend you go on it and cut out anything with sugar in! if you want to do it i will refer you!! OMG say what!! i just walked out :hissy::cry:

    Sorry for the rant but WTF!! how to build someones self esteem after she just said i have partial depression ''but its normal after a miscarriage''!!

    Please see photo attached of me :( (the geet big fatty!)

    p.s. soooo sorry for the long rant!

    Night of our engagement party!

    Im the one in the middle - the nurse!
     
  2. DiddyDons

    DiddyDons Guest

    OMFG!! How fucking dare she :hissy::gun: What a tosser! Babe you are by no means fat at all...she clearly has no time for other people!

    Im so sorry you had such a bad time with her, Id be inclined to complain about her!! Stupid cow :gun:

    :hugs::hugs:
     
  3. tootsy1987

    tootsy1987 Abbi and Alfie - My World

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    Thanks so much hunny! i phoned my mam ranting and she said i should put a complaint in too... but its such a small practise i would probably have to move doctors grr! she has done this to me before, she said if i dont feel hungary im not dieting properly and if i hadnt lost weight or it didnt work she would give me pills to speed up my heart rate (i obv declined!!) although i know i would like to lose a stone or something im quite happy as i am :( xxxx
     
  4. kermie219

    kermie219 Well-Known Member

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    You are beautiful and she is crazy and should not be practicing ANYWHERE!!! I think she defiantely deserves a complaint what a horrible witch! I am so sorry I truly am. :hug:
     
  5. Tracey2008

    Tracey2008 Well-Known Member

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    OMG she should never be able to get away with talking to you like that. You look gorgeous in your photos and I would take what she said to you with a piece of salt. Shes probably jealous of how good looking you are. I think they all try to give you this rubbish about losing weight. My doctor has done the same but I got pregnant with 2 of my children when I was so much bigger than I am now and you see lots of bigger ladies pregnant so although they do spin you the yarn about losing weight to get a baby only do it if you want too not because you feel your being told to do it. I think you look perfect as you are.
     
  6. tootsy1987

    tootsy1987 Abbi and Alfie - My World

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    awww thanks sooo much ladies :blush: you know how to cheer a gal up :) xxx
     
  7. Barneyboo

    Barneyboo Mummy of 2 beauty's

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    :hissy:OMG!!! That has annoyed me soooooo much!! You are a babe nothing wrong with you!:hugs:

    For me I was about 3 stone over weight had my son NO problems - I then loose 2 stone getting ready to try again and have had 3 m/cs unexplained.......
     
  8. tootsy1987

    tootsy1987 Abbi and Alfie - My World

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    tis shit aint it!! im guna try and avoid my doctors now... i used to go to the walk in centre instead but then most stuff they would say u need to see your gp about that grrr lol!
     
  9. Gabrielle

    Gabrielle Mum of 2! Pg with # 3!

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    OMG honey!!! That is just heartbreaking....HOW can she call you fat!?!?!? NOt at all Tara, you are beautiful and I don't think your weight has anything to do with your losses...HUGS> I can't believe she pulled out a pamphlet...she's cruel! I would for sure put in a complaint...then you won't have to see her again! And she wont do that to someone else in your situation. And what's with the crap....saying that you'll never know if your baby was viable or not?? What does she think they decided to just go and take your baby....that's messed up.

    So are you waiting to get results back form your swabs? I hope all is okay. Are you goin to the fertiltiy doc on thursday? Well I love you and I'm here for you.
     
  10. tootsy1987

    tootsy1987 Abbi and Alfie - My World

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    Thankyou Gabs hunny!! shes a bludy disgrace to the doctoring world i say! Yeah i have to wait for swabs... which probably wont show anything like they normally dont, im sure shes some perv, lol she always insists i have swabs for chlamidia (sp?) etc every time i see her even though i only ever had 1 sexual partner (my oh)! stupid woman!! also waiting to get my smear results, im pleased she done that as its a weight off my mind although she added one telling me about the thrombophelia testing. Yeah im at the fertility clinic on thurs, prob for more swabs / blood / touching and feeling lol! hoping they can sort something out for me.

    Hows things with you sweetie???

    xxxxxxxxxx
     
  11. Maidenet

    Maidenet Well-Known Member

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    That is the most horrible thing I have ever heard!!! Saying that..... just after I had gone through a d & c for a miscarriage, the consultant came in and said, dont you think you need to be using contraception now?? I was like what?? WHY! he said, because you had an abortion didnt you? I was like NO!!!!!! wtf!
    He need said ooops want a different consultant! xxx
     
  12. tootsy1987

    tootsy1987 Abbi and Alfie - My World

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    Bludy heck hun!!! :hugs:

    They dont have any fucking idea do they!!?? im sure thats what this doctor was implying, that i was too much of a wimp to let it happen naturally and rushed into it aborting my baby! who the feck does she think she is!? bet none of these hypocritical *******s have ever had to go through anything so similar! xxx
     
  13. tootsy1987

    tootsy1987 Abbi and Alfie - My World

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    haha how come bas-tards was blacked out but fucking wasnt :rofl:
     
  14. DiddyDons

    DiddyDons Guest

    Babe I would still complain and go and change doctors. If you lived in Sunderland you could change over to mine....theres loads of doctors in my surgery to choose from lol x
     
  15. CarCam

    CarCam WTT after 2nd MC :(

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    O-M-G!!! Are you serious!!!??? What a :witch:!!!

    You are seriously HOT lady, and you don't need to lose weight. And, just so you know, I am considered "morbidly obese" by today's standards, and I have had two previous healthy pregnancies and babies. SO, don't you EVER let someone like her make you blame or doubt yourself.

    She is a weenie:hissy:.
     
  16. Justme

    Justme Well-Known Member

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    Argggggggggggh OMG! What a cheek!! She sounds like the worst doctor in history! She also sounds like she is talking through her arse! I would definately make a complaint hun.How can she say such hurtful untrue things?!!? Im in shock.You definately don't look Fat and is she oblivious to the fact that seriously obese women carry sucessful pregnancy's every year anyways? ..I hope you get to see someone more understanding at the fertility clinic.Oooh im fuming lol,bet you were too.x x
     
  17. tootsy1987

    tootsy1987 Abbi and Alfie - My World

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    thanks girls :) i am debating putting in a complaint, just trying to figuire out if she is one of the partners of the surgery.

    Do any of you get cramp constant down one leg through ur hormonal times i.e. af or ov? she has worried me about blood clots cause since i was pregnant i have been suffering terrible cramps from my groin to ankle in my muscle and joints and she said i need thrombophilia screening... i had it a few years ago and it just cleared up... just wondered if anyone suffered with it to to make me feel more normal lol!

    xxxxx
     
  18. tootsy1987

    tootsy1987 Abbi and Alfie - My World

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    eee sarah i was! i was kinda upset too cause in one hand she was saying i was depressed a bit etc then the other hand she was blatantly putting me down and trying to make me feel bad! i new it was a bad idea going to see her! lol! xxxx
     
  19. Caroline

    Caroline Proud Mum of 4

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    :hug: HUN ,WHAT A COW, i CAN'T BELIEVE SHE SAID THAT TO YOU.
    (scuse capitals lo been typing & hit caps lock),

    I would seriously consider complaining, whatever happened to bedside manner.

    As for waiting 3 months to ttc, I think its really upto you & when you feel ready, unless the fertility docs say otherwise.
    I certainly wouldn't be taking any advice from her.
     
  20. Baby-Cakes

    Baby-Cakes Mum of 2 & 3 Angels

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    OMG how your not in a cell for assualting her right now I don't know coz I would of!!! and your are def not overweight!!! If u do want to complain u can do it through the Health Professionals Council on the web just do a search for HPC.

    :hug:
     

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