Well... as some of you probably know i found a lump on my cervix on friday so i was making an appt to see my doctor today, well at my doctor surgery there are 2 female doctors, one is lovely and so understanding, the other is a horrible witch!!! guess which one i got!??? The nice doc was on hols this week and i couldnt wait that long to be seen so i just took the appt with the miserable old (shes about 50 years old). Well i went in and AGAIN! had to explain that i had a miscarriage!(3rd time... do these people not talk or read??!) So she went oh no! she said what happened then so i explained i went for private scan for reasurrance and they found a baby with no heartbeat so i went to a and e and was sent for erpc the following day. She said well what did the hospital scan say? i said i fought and fought but they said they didnt need to re-scan me! she went hmmmm! then i told her about my lump i found and she said, right get on the bed and we shall have a look, as i was undressing she walked in and just looked at me standing in my underwear, she went ''whats your bmi these days''? i said erm when i went for op i think it was 27 she went hmmm! then she took some swabs as she thinks i have an infec as there was alot of discharge (sorry tmi!) altho i couldnt bare to tell her i have been having unprotected sex as i would have been slated as she said under no circumstances have unprotected sex for THREE months!! like say what??? Anyway i asked for a smear and she agreed no problem at all (thats the part i thought i would have to fight with!) so i had smear and swabs and had to give in a urine sample. So we go and sit down and she says... the reason you are miscarrying is cause your SO! overweight! you really need to drastically reduce your weight and you WILL (like she can read the future!!) have a viable pregnancy! (i will attach a pic of me below... im a size 14!!!) She said also i should NEVER EVER have had an ERPC as she said there was 2 reasons, either i had aborted a perfectly healthy baby that the hb was just hiding, she said EVERYONE knows that it can be difficult to see a hb at the dates i was!! or...... she said if they didnt rescan you then there must have been a certain way of telling the pregnancy wasnt viable i.e. there wasnt a faetus present and just the sac!! i said ''i saw the faetus, it was a perfect size just floating lifeless with no hb '' ''also i read the notes that said they removed a 10 wk old faetus'' she said well then u have aborted a healthy baby and you have NO right to say you have had a missed m/c as thats not what you have had! OMG!!! i could have screamed, cried, smacked, cried and screamed some more!!!!! OMG who is she!!!!! she said i should have just let things happen naturally as then i would know the pregnancy wasnt viable. She said what happens next then? (i was like aint u supposed to tell me that!) i replied well i have the appt at the fertility clinic on thursday. ''FERTILITY CLINIC!! seriously! you shouldnt be going down that route, your far tooo young, its just your weight, your using up nhs resources that you dont need and wasting peoples time!!!!'' OMG i cant do anything right, even thought i wass her colleague who referred me there as i have had 3 m/c's... So then.... the penultimut insult!!!!! She pulls out a FAT CAMP brochure and says.... have a look at that, i recommend you go on it and cut out anything with sugar in! if you want to do it i will refer you!! OMG say what!! i just walked out Sorry for the rant but WTF!! how to build someones self esteem after she just said i have partial depression ''but its normal after a miscarriage''!! Please see photo attached of me (the geet big fatty!) p.s. soooo sorry for the long rant! Night of our engagement party! Im the one in the middle - the nurse!