Absolutely terrified! - UPDATED FRER! Put my mind at ease

[xCookieDoughx]

Hey everyone!

I just found out yesterday that I'm pregnant, I am absolutely ecstatic! Me and OH were NTNP so are pleased

The only thing is that I've suffered a few miscarriages in the past before I had my son.

Now I'm constantly knicker checking, analysing every symptom (not that I really have any) and panicking at every thing!

All I have in the way of symptoms are cramps and, sorry of tmi, but 'passing wind' and going 'number 2' far more than usual!

I took a cheap test yesterday that gave me the faint positive and then did another today and got the same faint positive! So that's not helping my anxiety!

I don't know how many dpo etc I am as my periods are so irregular that I never know if I'm late etc, just took a test because of the excess bowel movements.

I'm scared that if I go out and get a better test but still get a faint line it'll make my anxiety worse! My miscarriages before were all faint lines that got fainter....

Anyone have any advice for me? Thanks!

 

[xCookieDoughx]

These are my tests >>>

Top one is yesterday and bottom one is today, both fmu

Xx

 

[fluffet521]

First of all, congrats, Cookie!

I completely understand how you feel. I lost my tiny little one (MMC) back in June and now that I'm pregnant again, I've been so nervous! Every time I wipe, I keep thinking I'll see AF blood. I've had the same symptoms as you and then some, but you're still pretty early so your symptoms will start picking up more and more soon.

As far as your faint positives, I've heard it takes 24-48 hours for hCG levels to double in your pee so I'd say just keep taking tests every day or every other day. I had a bunch of cheap ones, so I tested every day for the first 12 days! It made me feel better to see those lines getting darker, even if just by a little bit, so it'll probably do the same for you, hun. And try to have faith that this time will be different. I know that's easier said than done, but it has helped me, and every day that passes I feel a little more confident.

Hang in there, sweetie. I'm keeping EX (everything crossed) for that bean to keep on sticking! xx

 

[hollyw79]

it's soooo hard.. I know.. I'm there too!!!

Not sure what kind of tests you're using- but I found the cheapy ones were CRAP with line progression. I bought some First response (FRER) and they work MUCH better!

Best advice I can say is what I keep telling myself Take it one day at a time and what's meant to be, will be!

 

[fluffet521]

Great advice, Holly!

Where in Florida are you? I'm in Tallahassee. I haven't "met" anyone else from Florida yet, so it's pretty cool seeing you! And I love your bible verse quote, too, btw.

 

[hollyw79]

Great advice, Holly!

Where in Florida are you? I'm in Tallahassee. I haven't "met" anyone else from Florida yet, so it's pretty cool seeing you! And I love your bible verse quote, too, btw.

I lived in Jacksonville for about 15 years.. and actually just moved to Georgia to be near dh's family about a year ago.. guess I forgot to update that All of my immediate family is still there though!

and thank you.. it's my all time favorite verse! I need to read it more these days! The beginning of pregnancy is SO hard!

 

[xCookieDoughx]

Thanks ladies they are just cheapy tests ( 2 for £1). I went and bought some 'answer' first response tests so going to take one in the morning. The suspense is killing me!
I don't really feel pregnant at all at the moment. I'm sure I'll long for these days when (if) the sickness starts! It's been at 6 weeks with the rest of my pregnancies so I'm sure it'll start soon!
I really hope I see some progression!

 

[fluffet521]

Let us know how tomorrow morning's test turns out, Cookie. I'm excited for you! And yes, I think you will look back and wish for the symptomless days, lol! Try to enjoy them now - they will come, I'm sure of it!

 

[hollyw79]

yes! definitely keep us posted! I bet the line will be great!

I was stressing bc I was having the same issue with cheapy tests.. made me super nervous. Those tests used to be better a few years ago.

what do you ladies think about just skipping over this first trimester mumbo jumbo

 

[greats]

Aww hang in there! And FRERs are sooo much better! Keep us updated!

 

[xCookieDoughx]

So I took this just now, woke up needing the loo and couldn't wait!!!

I'm so pleased with this line!!!

 

[Hannah's Mom]

Lovely line! There is certainly no arguing with that lol! Huge congrats Hun xxx

 

[TTC 84]

Fantastic line

 

[hollyw79]

Looks GREAT!!!!! I'm so glad!!

 

[hollyw79]

You definitely need a pregnancy ticker!

 

[fluffet521]

Yaaaaaaay, Cookie!!! I knew you'd get a better line today! There is no denying that one, hun!



And I agree with holly, you need a pregnancy ticker!!!

 

[greats]

Fab line! I love FRER lol

 

[xCookieDoughx]

Thank you everyone! I'm going to get a ticker later when I'm on my laptop I'm still so so so worried something is going to happen though! I work with children so it's quite physical and I'm scared I'm going to do something to cause me to lose this one.
I think my other mc's have just terrified me to the point of not being able to relax
I actually can't wait for the morning sickness to start lol!
I'm still going to the loo every 30 mins to check, analysing every cramp (even though they are mostly wind cramps lol!)
Ugh, I just want to sit back and enjoy this pregnancy, but I feel like I can't
Any tips?! Xx

 

[hollyw79]

I feel exactly the same. BUT-- at the same token, you could look at it as having ALL the faith in the world in THIS little bean and love & cherish it for every moment that you are carrying it!

 

[fluffet521]

Aw, Cookie, I am so right there with you. I cannot escape the feeling that this pregnancy is going to be taken away from me, just like my last one. It's very disheartening. My only advice is just what I keep telling myself daily: what's meant to be will be, everything happens for a reason, and just take one day at a time. I finally came up with what I thought was a good analogy for DH, who is also having a hard time accepting the fact that I'm pregnant again (he says he doesn't want to get excited just to have his heart broken into a million pieces again). I told him that getting pregnant again is like falling in love. If it doesn't work out, it hurts so much, it's unbearable. But time heals wounds, maybe not completely, but it does get better. So we take a risk every time, but it's soooo worth the risk in the long run!

I wish I could be more excited about this pregnancy, but I feel like I'm doing good just to accept that it has happened again. A part of me is keeping a wall up, for my protection, I suppose. I even have all the symptoms (exhaustion, nausea, gas, emotional, etc.)! So my point is, even once your symptoms arrive, you'll probably still worry. Just try to enjoy the present moments instead of thinking long term.

P.S. If you can't tell, I'm having a moody day today. Sorry if my post sounds doom and gloom. I'm usually a happy, perky gal - I'm just not feeling it today.