After some advice/Help haven't got a clue about BF!

Discussion in 'Breastfeeding' started by lynzlogan, Jan 28, 2011.

  1. lynzlogan

    lynzlogan Guest

    Hello.

    Im Lynsey (currently in third tri), i'm 33wks pregnant with my 2nd Son.

    With my 1st i bottle fed him from day one, as i was intimidated by the thought of breast feeding (i was 20 at the time).

    This time round i have been under a lot of stress.
    My mother is not around to support me as she is an Alcoholic and i only see her once a month.

    When DS was 14 months i was finally diagnosed with PND and put on medication for it. I also started smoking again when DS was 14 months. Ds is now 3.5 yrs.

    Since i found out i was pregnant i had to come off my PND tablets as they weren't safe to take whilst pregnant. I've struggled but managed to get through the past 33wks without them (somehow), But i've not managed to give up the smokes. :(

    I have gone from smoking 30 a day to between 10-12 each day...which for me my GP thinks is really good.
    All the nicorrette stuff gave me really bad side effects so my GP suggested that i just cut down as much as possible- which i have done.

    Spoke to my GP this evening as she suggested that due to me smoking through pregnancy that i should try and breast feed this baby for at least 4 weeks..to allow goodness to get to him, and she said it would be ok for me to do so if i was still smoking.

    I am not here to ask for your understanding etc....as i know i don't deserve any support etc and i feel really bad.

    I am here as i do not have the first clue about how to breast feed, what equipment if any i need etc, and how often feeds should be done.

    Is anyone willing to give me some advice???

    Obviously if my post does offend anyone then mods please feel free to remove it.

    Thanks in advance lynz
     
  2. kelly29

    kelly29 Guest

    hiya hun, well i'm holding my hands up i smoked whilst pregnant i gave up a few times but couldn't quite quit full stop but since coming home with lo iv'e quite i think it made her seem more real and its like 9 wks now ;) and i'm never smoking again. i'm also bf for the 1st time too and the best advice i can give and what i was told is...take each day at a time in a short while it will get easier. its not always easy. i'm 9 wks in and still have difficult days and that's the truth. but things would still be hard if i was ff lo.

    i ff all my other children but wanted so much to bf my last baby ;) and if you knew me, you'd never of believed i would have got this far. i'm well chuffed when i look at lo and see that my milk has made her get sooooooooo big ;) its the best feeling when your lo is snuggled up into you.

    good luck babe you can do it x

    ps u do deserve support no matter what!! we cant all be perfect xx
     
  3. discoclare

    discoclare Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2009
    Messages:
    4,520
    Likes Received:
    0
    there's nothing in your post that I find offensive! This forum isn't so busy as your tri forum so don't be despondent if it takes a while to get plenty of responses. Didn't want to read and run but need to bath DD and get her ready for bed so will just really quickly answer a couple of your questions and come back later with more info if that's OK with you.

    Firstly, you need your boobs, a couple of nursing bras and some ladies use breastpads because they have leaking when they start BFing. That's it. Things like breatpumps are optional if you decide you want to express milk, but not necessary.

    Secondly, read a lot! read this forum, www.kellymom.com has good info and there are videos showing you how to latch your baby on if you search on youtube.

    Feeding should be done on demand. This is how the baby teaches your body how to make enough milk for him, because BFing is supply and demand and they need to kind of pre-order their supply in! This does mean frequent feeding in the early days I'm afraid. They also need to feed frequently as BM is much gentler on their tummies than formula and they digest it faster so need filling more quickly. plus they don't over-engorge themselves as much as they do with bottles.

    Ask you midwife if there are Bfing peer support groups/cafes in your area. You can go to them while pregnant as well as once your baby is born and get advice from other mums, tips, support etc.
     
  4. kelly29

    kelly29 Guest


    great advice xx
     
  5. Celesse

    Celesse Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 2, 2009
    Messages:
    8,764
    Likes Received:
    0
    Well done for cutting down so far. I tried many times to quit smoking before finally managing to in 2007 and I know it really is one of those things that is only possible if you are in the right place in your life.

    You don't really need anything for breast feeding. However it is useful to have breast pads and nipple cream available. Other things that can help are a nursing pillow, nursing bras. Breast pump, bottles and sterilising equipment are also useful if you plan to express and give the baby breastmilk from a bottle. It generally isn't recommended to introduce a bottle before 6 weeks as it can cause nipple confusion.

    It is usually a good idea to breastfeed the baby on demand. Little babies can need to feed on a very regular basis, 1-2 hourly is normal during the newborn stage. Some babies don't need to feed this often.

    One thing I would advise is that if you plan to continue smoking whilst breastfeeding is to have a smoking top to put on when going out for a cig, and changing it and washing hands throughly before feeding baby. The chemicals in the cig can stick to your clothes and when baby is close to you are feeding they can breathe this in.
     
  6. kmac625

    kmac625 Mom to baby Clara

    Joined:
    Aug 9, 2009
    Messages:
    5,206
    Likes Received:
    0
    Of course you deserve support! Big :hug: for thinking you deserve less than that.

    I only finally quit smoking at the 20 week mark of my pregnancy and then didn't smoke again until Clara was about 3 months old. I don't smoke everyday, sometimes even go a week or two without, but I can't seem to cut it out completely. Smoking and breastfeeding is still better for your baby than smoking and formula feeding at the end of the day, so it's great that you're wanting to do this.

    Like discoclaire said, all you really need are your boobs, a nursing bra and some nursing pads for leakage (luckily I don't leak ever). Bf is done on demand, though after a couple months baby might get into a bit of a routine as to when he/she is hungry. Support is another necessary thing when first starting out bf. If you don't have anyone close to you, try finding a support group in your area, and of course there's always us ladies here on BnB. If you ever want to talk about your issues (guilt perhaps - I feel it) about smoking while pregnant/bfing please get in touch with me. I've also dealt with depression in the past and can lend some support there too. Good luck to you hun.
     
  7. minties

    minties Complete

    Joined:
    Nov 17, 2009
    Messages:
    15,646
    Likes Received:
    14
    Good on you for cutting down on the smoking, that's fantastic.

    Does your midwife/hospital not support breastfeeding? As that was how I was told and shown how to do it, by my midwife and the nurses and midwives that worked there. I am now glad that I had a c-section as I would have been out of the hospital within 4 hours otherwise and would have struggled.

    My breastfeeding tips:

    Have baby on your lap supported by a pillow or two. Have them facing your body with their head where your breast is - never take the breast to the baby, bring the baby to the breast.

    With whatever hand you find easiest, place your thumb and index finger on the top and bottom of the breast, just above the areola. You want to then "sandwich" your fingers together to make a nice easy shape for the baby to suck into their mouth.

    Tickle the baby's lips with your nipple and they should open their mouth nice and wide. Quickly insert the breast - the nipple and as much of the areola as possible - into baby's mouth and they should start to suck and form a good seal.

    If it feels wrong, you hear a clicking noise from the baby's mouth, or the baby appears to not be getting any milk and cries, try again and again until you get it right.
     
  8. discoclare

    discoclare Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 19, 2009
    Messages:
    4,520
    Likes Received:
    0
    I thought of something else. Obviously with BFing you don't measure how much your baby feeds, you just feed them what they want. This can be difficult for some people, but you need to trust your body that it will make enough milk. My MIL kept saying to me "the problem with what you're doing is that you don't know how much she's getting" which wasn't terribly helpful and made me doubt myself (she is now very supportive of BFing, but she was just so unfamiliar with it all at the beginning). Instead you need to make sure your baby has enough wet and dirty nappies and that they are gaining weight after the first week. Here is a useful guide to counting nappies:
    https://www.nct.org.uk/info-centre/information/view-44
     
  9. CeriB

    CeriB Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Jun 3, 2010
    Messages:
    3,112
    Likes Received:
    0
    No judgement - everyone deserves support if they ask for it!

    I found Lanisoh nipple cream a life saver!! It hurts like hell to start off with (not for everyone, but it did for me) and the cream really helped keep me sain! I did get bottles, pump and steraliser unit, just in case. I have expressed several times and Erin is having bottles as well. Nursing bras have been great too - easier to pop the clip and get on with it!

    Good luck!
     
  10. BunnyFace

    BunnyFace Mummy

    Joined:
    Apr 21, 2010
    Messages:
    1,683
    Likes Received:
    0
    All you need is your boobs, breast pads (i recommend lasinoh or boots own) and some nipple cream, kamillosan and lasinoh are both good or your own milk :thumpup:
    That really is the basics. If you want to express milk then you'll need a pump (medela are great!), steriliser and bottles.
    As for feeds, it really depends on your LO! I feed on demand and when my LO was newborn she fed every 2-4 hours and cluster fed in the evenings but every baby is different :).
    Good luck hun x
     
  11. summer rain

    summer rain Mum of 5

    Joined:
    May 5, 2010
    Messages:
    17,116
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi hun

    what they all said is really great advice. I BF all of mine to some extent and it is easy when you know what you're doing. If you've got PND as well in a lot of milder cases BF can really help, and if you do feel the need to go onto a medication while BF there are plenty of ones now that are considered safe. I used to live in Dagenham and it depends which end you live but some of the health visitors in that area are great, really supportive and non-judgemental; also I believe there is a breastfeeding meet up in Marks Gate and there may be others in the borough these days as well. xx
     
  12. Betheney

    Betheney Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 24, 2009
    Messages:
    5,682
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hiya

    I'm not expert on Breastfeeding but my LO is 2.5 months old and we are still going strong and i remember if i could ever pass on some information to another future breastfeeder this is what i'd like to pass on

    1. It will HURT, but you have to remember that it will pass once those nipples toughen up! Although it is suppose to hurt when they latch on and get going and start sucking really hard but after a minute or even less than that it should stop hurting during the feeding, don't continue feeding if its killing they may be attached wrong (or your nipples could be extremely tender a common issue in the 1st week)
    2. From what i can tell feeding is a bitch for women who get cracked nipples, i read so many stories about 'i had cracked nipples and it was impossible to continue....' or 'i had cracked nipples and it made BF downright horrendous......' so obviously the aim it to avoid any damage to your nipples. A midwife told me that if you have the baby attached badly at just one feed you can damage your nipple. So if your feeding and your not quite sure if its correct or not DON'T risk it. When i was in hospital everytime i attached Eva i would call a midwife/nurse to come and check the attachment and if it was wrong i'd try again. I managed to never get any major damage to my nipples and that obviously makes the breastfeeding journey that little bit easier.
    3. Pillows! oh being comfortable is so important!!!! having the baby position high up enough helps so much, i struggle so much if i don't have something to rest my arms and the baby on.
    4. Supply! another thing i was terrified about was having a small supply or running it out!! i mean i read so many stories about this as well, babies who feed for hours because there isn't a huge supply or they feed once every hour....... My hospital says to give them one full feed from one breast and just offer them the other one, i found this to be fantastic! so i would feed Eva off one breast and she would get a full feed and then i'd offer the other one but she very rarely took it. This means i have one full feed in each breast so if she does have a growth spurt and need more than the normal feed well thats ok because i have an ENTIRE other breast to offer her, feeding babies off both equally at one feed makes this difficult, each breast has only half a feed so if the baby is having a growth spurt and needs more than the normal full feed its difficult because they've taken all that is there........
    5. The first week! Remember all your milk is getting itself sorted out and so is baby don't stress about it all the first week it is allowed to be an everywhere week, my 3rd day Eva wanted to feed for 3 hours straight! i couldn't put her down nor could i stop it was really hard an she was obviously hungry but i wasn't giving her enough she was just too hungry (this is usually when FF give in, they start to panic the baby is starving) you must allow your babies to suck as much as they want in those first few days it helps to bring your milk in. Then on my 3rd night she screamed all night constantly wanting to be fed and not going to sleep i thought i was going to have a break down it was so hard! i think i got about an hours sleep. Then my milk came in on day 4! a usual 45 min feed was shortened to a 15 min feed and she then slept for a full 5 hours!!! don't give in to formula (although i'm really not judging those who do, i couldn't care less what people choose) just keep telling yourself the first week is always hard you just have to get through it, make yourself a day to count down to like day 14 or something because you'll probably find by then its not so bad anymore.

    Anyway these are the tips i always wanted to pass on because i truly beleive they helped me and this is what i learnt in my own journey and i want to help someone else with what i've learnt. :)
     
  13. Thegirl

    Thegirl Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2010
    Messages:
    416
    Likes Received:
    0
    Hi
    My best advice would be to relax about it. Don't stress and don't panic. If it doesn't happen for you then at least you've given it a go. That really is the best attitude to go into it with.
    Another tip would be drink a lot so you always have a supply.
    The only equiptment I bought before hand was a couple of cheaper nursing bras (2 for £10 in matalan). I then got measured once I was feeding to make sure I was in the right size, since I went up four cup sizes I can no longer buy then from matalan, but Marks and spencer go up to a large size and a reasonably priced.
    I breast feed. I have been so lucky and it's all gone well for me, duck to water and all that. Good luck and I hope it all goes well.
    PS re:smoking, I used the Allan Carr book two and a half years ago and it worked a treat-however I bought it four years ago and didn't read it until I was really ready to stop!
     
  14. lynzlogan

    lynzlogan Guest

    just popping on quick to say i'm shocked by all the replies :)

    haven't had a chance to read them all yet, as my 3yr old has been driving me mad today.
    Once his in bed i'll sit down chill and have a proper read and will reply properly- thanks again :)
     
  15. Pixxie

    Pixxie Mum to 1 little girl

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2009
    Messages:
    7,197
    Likes Received:
    1
    Of course you deserve support! :hugs:

    My advise is
    1. It hurts at first, not necessarily becuase you are doing something wrong but becuase the baby sucks harder than you might think and your nipples are tender. For the first 5 days Lyras latch was excruciating, I would curl my toes and grit my teeth but it stopped suddenly on the 5th day!
    2. The baby will need feeding very often, some go as little as an hour between feeds at first but most go 2-3 hours. It's normal and you just have to let baby guide you, feed as often as they are hungry.
    3. In the early days baby might not wake for a feed, if they go more than 3 hours wake them for a feed.
    4. There is a nasty growth spurt at around 3 weeks. Don't panic! Baby will want to feed what seems like constantly but it won't last more than a few days. This first growth spurt is what makes most women think they don't have enough milk, just persevere.
    5. Trust your body. It WILL make enough for your baby!
    6. Most important is to relax, stress kills breastfeeding.

    Xxx
     

Share This Page

  1. This site uses cookies to help personalise content, tailor your experience and to keep you logged in if you register.
    By continuing to use this site, you are consenting to our use of cookies.
    Dismiss Notice