am I mature enough

[spicyorange]

I'm nearly 27 and I always considered myself quiet mature, before I was married I was quite independent as an only child I always looked after myself. SincecIv been married (3yrs) I rely I dh a lot and I think Iv regressed. Tonight I banged my head (accidentally), something which I do often as though I was still a child, then burst at into tears, I also got upset when I ran out of butter for the cake I'm making.AF is here at the moment and I'm feeling hormonal and emotional but I wonder if things like bumping my head make me cry am I really mature enough to be a parent? What if I never am?Iv been champing at the bit to ttc and we all have a year to wait but recently Iv started thinking what I'd I'm not ready, what if I never well be, what if I'm just not cut out to be a good mom. For the first time I'm actually scared...

 

[newlywed2013]

I have felt like this a few times too. But I know deep down that I am ready. I wish I had some advice, but I didn't want to read and run...

 

[pinkcatgirl]

That made me smile. Yesterday I cried because I was trying to sew a little dress for my daughter and it went wrong and looks awful and I felt useless! Sometimes things just stress us out, don't think it means you are not ready to be a mum.

I think in terms of being ready, having a stable marriage is helpful, as the first 12 months of having a baby are pretty stressful and hard work, and also v v expensive, so save up every penny whilst you can! I am cursing my decadent 29 yr old self for not saving more and buying so many shoes / handbags/ dresses etc! Doesn't help if you go back to work on about 40% of your original salary, being hard up is then permanent!

We got our BFP 2 weeks after officially TTC which freaked me out a bit as then was panicking about not being ready, not having thought it through etc. Luckily then you get 8 more months to get to grips with the idea!

 

[xcharx]

i think only you can answer your question! To me you sound mature enough we all cry over silly things, specially when AF is around.
im sure you'll be a brilliant mum no matter how prepared you think you are having a child is still a complete shock! You will find a way to cope

 

[spicyorange]

Thanks guys. Feeling better today. Maybe the bangnon the head knocked some sense in!

 

[Yo_Yo]

Aww, don't worry. I sometimes get bad pmt and get emotional over silly things.
But in still a good mummy to 2 great kids.

You wil be fine as a mummy

 

[MamaByrd]

Us women are very emotional for a reason. The fact that you cried when you banged your head, means you will be able to sympathize when your poor bubs bumps his head. You cried when you couldn't find butter for the cake because the cake meant something to you & you didn't want to let down those that were going to enjoy it. (even if it was just for you )

It means you have feelings, and you care about the things that are important to you. Which to me, sounds like you'll make a fantastic mother.

 

[loeylo]

I agree with the above. I cried at Open Season (the cartoon) recently, I cried last night when my dog was sick, and the other day when I was stressed with work stuff and my boyfriend went to his friends to play Xbox whilst I was doing housework. It doesn't mean I am immature - immaturity is not being able to understand or handle emotions and flying off the handle, crying is a sensible outlet to emotion!
Oh, and, crying at anything is acceptable when you are on AF!!

 

[MellyH]

Any crying in the three days before or three days after the start of your period doesn't even count. I cried watching a cartoon last week the day before my period arrived.

I know what you mean about comparing previous independence to current dependence. Before I met my husband I had finished my PhD on my own, gotten a job and moved overseas and lived on my own, settled in a new country, made friends, solved problems, done everything myself. Now that we have been living together for a few years and gotten married recently, I realise that I have ceded certain areas to my husband - he does all the electronics set-up and maintenance, most of the cooking, etc. And it's not like I'm helpless, but now that it's been a few years since I had to work out the electronics stuff on my own, I would definitely have to take awhile to remember how it all worked! Which I do get embarrassed about. But there again, I do a bunch of the things he used to do but doesn't have to any more, like bills and car maintenance and holiday logistics etc. So it goes both ways.

 

[Wnt2beAMom]

Us women are very emotional for a reason. The fact that you cried when you banged your head, means you will be able to sympathize when your poor bubs bumps his head. You cried when you couldn't find butter for the cake because the cake meant something to you & you didn't want to let down those that were going to enjoy it. (even if it was just for you )

It means you have feelings, and you care about the things that are important to you. Which to me, sounds like you'll make a fantastic mother.

Awesome explanation