Any advice please? 4 days to decide!

[mummy2lissy]

Hello ladies,

So I'm just after any sort of advice really. Last night I was up at hospital as I was leaking some waters, which the midwife decided could be my hind waters. I was on the monitor for half and hour and was having quite regular and strong tightenings. During the examination she checked my cervix and I was 1cm, and bubs is 3/5ths engaged. Im having loads of pressure when I walk so hes definatly moved down. I hardly slept last night, and Im having pains today aswell.

The problem Im having is that the midwife I saw kept going on about natural delivery (Im having a section on Thursday for a previous 3rd degree tear).
When a section was first mentioned to me I said I wouldnt want it, then I changed my mind and said I would have it, I think the reason I changed my mind was people talking of being incontinent from both front and back, and the thought of having to go to theatre again and be stitched up. I always knew at the back of my mind that I would like to do it naturally.

My consultant said it would be better to have a section on the grounds that I dont want to tear again, and not tearing cannot be guarenteed. Nothing more than that really.

Now Im all confused because all labours are different and I may not tear at all. Heres my thoughts:

C-section- PRO-No chance of tears and I know when hes going to arrive.4 Days!!
CONS- the amount of time I will have to spend in hospital, possibility of a infection and the fact I wont be able to do things.

Natural- PRO- I quite enjoyed it last time-minus the tear, I will get home sooner and it might go perfect. and if I do tear, the repair can be done rather than having it done 6 weeks after delivery.
CONS- May tear, may have to wait another 4 weeks if nothing happens before!?

I was thinking if something happens before thursday and I progress further, I will do it naturally. But if nothing by Thursday Il go ahead with the section?
I cant get passed the thought that I may have to wait another 3 weeks to meet him when Im ready now.

I also kept measuring a few weeks ahead and I presume because I had a section booked I was never offered a scan to see how big he may be. So I may decide natural and hes huge!

Is there anyway they might consider me not going over my dates, or giving me a sweep before thursday to see if anything happens? Im 38+2

Well done if you managed to get through it all! Im just confused.

Thanks!! x

 

[whoops]

I've no advice on a section vs natural birth as you'll have your own reasons for either.

But I would say to try not to let a few weeks influence you too much... Your baby will get here eventually, whether it's in a few days or a few weeks and while you may be impatient now, a couple of weeks/months down the road, it won't matter that you had to wait a bit longer.

Sorry if I'm sounding a bit preachy

 

[membas#1]

Didn't want to R&R, but don't have much advice. Guess if it were me I would wait and do it naturally--you may or may not tear. I've been measuring 2 weeks ahead but had a scan last week and baby is right on target, just 2 days ahead--so try not to read too much into measuring 2 weeks ahead. Just make the best decision for you and baby and you can't go wrong. Good luck.

 

[juicylove]

Good luck with your decision, id say it's hard to be positive after a bad experience

I have had 2 births with epidural and all went ok and I'm still nervous about thus birth you just never know pity it's not just straight forward

 

[Perdita]

Yikes - tough decision!! First I would try and put the time thing out of your head, tough I know but there's lots of other reasons to work through!
I'm in the position of having to wait till the scan when I;'m admitted for induction - if he's still breech then it's a c-section and much as I would rather avoid it I've accepted that it would be safest for him as he is quite a big baby already and with 2 and a half weeks to go I know he's only going to grow a bit more so would rather not risk a breech vaginal birth if he's going to be topping 9lbs!!
Every pregnancy and birth is different and you can request an episiotomy rather than take the risk of an uncontrolled tear I would hope!
I would request another scan, explain you don't want to make a decision without a better idea of how big baby is and also what position he's in!
It must be a very tricky choice and only you know what is most important to you - don't let a consultant bully you - I did find it odd that because of a tear the last time he's so keen on a c-section, thought they were all about encouraging natural childbirth or is that all left up to the midwives these days?? Though I suppose he could have other reasons that would add up to make a more compelling argument for it?
Either way, hope you have the best birth experience you can however baby makes their entrance and you heal fast so you can enjoy the early days!
xx

 

[Armywife]

I'm with you here honey! I had a 2nd degree episiotomy, a 3rd (verging on 4th) degree tear and grazing last time. My pelvis was also badly damaged due to the way they delivered my baby. I was advised by consultant right from the start to have a section this time which is what i have decided to go with, however i have been thinking so so much about trying natural.

For me the pros and cons are a little different as i was so badly damaged down there i couldn't do anything for a long time after anyway - lifting, driving, even walking - so the recovery time wasn't any faster or easier than if i'd had a section. This scares me half to death as i was told by a registra right at the beginning of this pregnancy that there is a good chance i would tear badly again along my scars. I'm not sure if this is because my scars are so bad, have never healed properly and it's only going to be 19 months between births but it still scared me. After my surgery to repair last time they wanted to keep me in for 4 nights but i discharged myself the next day as i was treated so badly. This time, even if i have a section i will have no problem doing the same again, my mum and husband will be here to help and i am totally petrified of that ward after my last birth.

I just want to have an uncomplicated, natural birth like i hear so many lucky women saying they have done though!

I just can't face the thought of going through such an horrific birth again, if i did tear like last time it would put me off having any more children and the trauma would be too much. I have been having therapy for ptsd from last birth and I think i have decided my mental health is more important than trying for natural - i'll probably change my mind a million times before the 4th March tho!

Good luck with your decision hun xxx

 

[marnie79]

tough one there hun, i reckon u should have a chat with ur consultant and ask for a scan to estimate the size of the baby and position etc and see what they suggest, if baby isnt too bad in size by ur c sec date would they be willing to induce u if u havent already gone into labour and try a natural delivery first ?? hope it all goes ok hun xx

 

[Tanikit]

What concerns me is that you say your waters are leaking - have you discussed this with your consultant or midwife as this can lead to infections - I am not sure how hind vs fore waters differ, but if there was a chance of infection I would go with the earlier option even if it is a C-section. The time you have to wait is not so important unless it increases the risk of your baby getting infected in there.

As for vaginal vs C-section I am afraid I am in a similar situation unsure which to go for for other reasons. Right now I am heading for induction with all the risks it entails, but if anything changes and it becomes safer to get baby out by C-section (for me or the baby or both) then I'd rather do the C-section.

 

[TattooedMama]

I think all you can continue to do is weigh the pros vs cons and try to decide what feels right to do. There is no guarantee that you would tear again. Also, what was the circumstances last time that caused you to tear? It could have been something that whoever delivered you had done, or had you do that caused you to tear unnecessarily. There are many ways to prevent tearing such as using hot compresses on the perineum, massaging the area during birth, pushing when you feel the urge NOT when you are told to, etc. I think it sounds like you want a natural birth but since you are afraid of the possibility of a tear combined with your want to see baby sooner(I'm impatient to see my Lo too ) that that is what is pushing you towards a csection.

It is possible to have a small leak of the waters that seals itself up so it would be important to find out if you are still leaking amnitoic fluid or not. Wehn waters have broken it increases the risk of an infection, however you can safely stay at home and just monitor your temperature to make sure you don't get a fever(which indicates infection) and see if you will start labor on your own in the next 48hrs. It is much more likely you will get an infection in the hospital with broken waters than at home. At home your body is used to whatever germs etc may be around and has a tolerance to it, at a hospital you are around things that are foreign to your body and so increases the risk of infection.

I personally wouldnt want the cesection as it has its own drawbacks with recovery etc.

 

[mummy2lissy]

Thanks for the replies ladies! I had my heart set on the section all this time and now when someone has actually spoke to me about how perfect it could be, its making me feel like im losing out on that special bond of a natural delivery.

The midwife said last night that it was my hind waters which are less likely to become infected, but I have been wondering about this. She said sometimes women can just leak without actually dilating at all.

She said my cervix isnt long and its 1cm. When I got home I had quite a loss of blood and a few little clots very red almost fleshy ones, then when I wiped I had the snot like goo, which I presume is my plug coming away, although there hasnt been much of it today, just little bits when I wipe. I still have bad back pain and alot of tightenings, and when I walk it feels like a bowling ball is between my legs, so Im thinking can I really put up with this for 3 weeks to go natural as I suffer with SPD aswell. I may end up struggling with that aswell.

I think the main things are Im thinking are I want a section because I wont have the tear, and the healing process(which was long and painful) and i know its not a very good reason but I do get to meet him on the day Ive waited for and known I will for so long.
And I want to do it naturally because I feel like Im doing something to bring my little boy into the world.

Ohh I just dont know
OH thinks I should go natural if he comes before Thursday, and if not have the section Thursday as planned. ArghhH!!!

 

[Armywife]

I think your OH has a good idea there! That is just my opinion tho, good luck sweetie xx