Anybody lost "friends" because of bfing? bit of rant

[lovealittle1]

I have purposely distanced myself from a few "friends" because of their views on breastfeeding. One "friend" who has a LO one month older than me and ff told another friend that my LO cries all the time because he is bfed and does not get enough and also turned her 9 year old daughters head away when I was bfing my LO because she thinks it's inappropriate to nip.

Another "friend" has voiced that she thinks bfing past 6 months is gross. I have no intention of quitting anytime soon so I can't be bothered to carry on being her friend when she feels that way.

Im lucky to have my gals at bnb. I do wish I had more true friends in real life though. I just wish people didn't have to judge each other so much and just respect each others decisions.

 

[Katt]

You are better off without them! I do wonder how people become so misguided!

Is there a breastfeeding support group near you? I met loads of lovely people at mine who didn't have crazy views like that!
X

 

[lovealittle1]

Yes there is and I go to it almost every week but I have never been great at making friends iykwim? I feel shy/awkward asking people if they want to do something outside of the group. Any pointers?

 

[Katt]

It is hard making that first step! You could try suggesting another local group and see if anyone wants to try, or just bite the bullet and see if anyone fancies a coffee! Or if the weather is nice suggest a walk after the group.

There is a meets section on here, I haven't tried it but it might be good?

If I was near you i would come for coffee

 

[lovealittle1]

Thanks Katt! I'm a Cat too!

 

[Katt]

Woo hoo! K/Cats rule!

 

[mummy3]

I'm not a cat/Kat but want to share I haven't lost any friends from bfing but I know people who have Want to say try and see if there is someone on here you click with who is closeby. I have met a wonderful friend and fellow bfer though this site. Omg at turning the 9 year old head away

 

[CeriB]

I had a friend refuse to come and talk to me as I 'had my boob out'

I have meet quite a lot of ladies at BF group, but I'm the same about outside the group. I am actually going to another baby group this week that one of the other mums suggested, so see how it goes.

It is hard but I think babies are a great conversation starter and we should use it to our advantage!!

 

[LovingMummy]

I've mentioned a few times in posts on here that my mature 40 yr old so called best friend is no more, thanks to my BF! Was totally shocked when I realised she didn't agree with it, we were out and I was going to nip for the first time as I thought she'd support me if anyone said something. Turned out she was the one who said something and I had to nurse in the baby change, too shocked, upset & in nervous new mum mode to be able to say anything. Another occasion she told me to put my boob away (like you can actually see any boob when your bf lol!) when her 15 year old entered the room!! Whom I might add, she briefly bf!!!!!
Anyway, 9 months on and I've developed a thick skin, ditched her (she's hardly made contact in the last 9 months!) and I've found new friends.
I fail to understand how some women can be so prudish when they've got kids too!!

 

[Pixxie]

Ask if they go to other baby groups in the area and pop along to one of them too, or (this one works really well) announce that you are going to lunch at such a place after the group next week and if anyone would like to join you they are most welcome! When I did that there was about 15 of us in the pub having lunch xx

 

[teal]

One of my friends kept telling me I *had* to get him onto a bottle. Really annoyed me!

 

[summer rain]

Thankfully I haven't had any of this from actual friends; more like some members of OHs family who we can easily avoid. I'm shocked at the attitude of your friends; and I am sure you can find better xx

 

[Nervous_1]

Like Summer Rain I haven't had a problem with friends, but with family. It really gets to me when my mum is always saying things like "isn't it time he had a bottle?" (he's 5 months) or "it makes me cringe". I try not to dwell on it, but whenever I see her I come away feeling very down and teary about our bfing arguments. I've tried to avoid going there as much as possible as a result

 

[kmac625]

Where in Canada are you lovealittle? I'm in Toronto and would love to meet up with you. We could nip around town together lol. I'm actually quite shocked at your friends' attitudes as I don't know anyone who thinks bf is weird or bad or anything (at least not that they've said anything to me and I nip everywhere lol).

 

[lovealittle1]

kmac-I wish we lived close because I would love love love to meet up but I'm way over in Wpg.

Thanks for all the responses. I'm going to try to make more friends at bf group. It would be so good for me and LO.

 

[kmac625]

Yah, Winnipeg is a bit far to travel to hang out lol.