Anyone else have a moment of panic??

[Lisa2701]

Ladies in having a freak out just now. I am 4+3 weeks today and I started TTC 5 years ago! I did however have some time out to lose weight and only started TTC again 4 cycles ago. I wasn't expecting to fall pregnant so quickly, not after so many years of trying. I am estatic that I'm pregnant, I mean realllly over the moon, it felt like it was never going to happen. Thing is there are a few things really stressing me out: I am in my 3rd year at uni and I won't be finished by time babies born (have decided to postpone my final module because I've have a huge exam just after baby being born if I don't and I don't want to miss a thing with baby because I'm too busy studying!) I also compete obedience with dogs and have just bought a collie puppy three weeks ago, this takes me up to owning 3 dogs, and the pup will still be very young when baby's born. I have a 10 year old with autism, and I myself have fibromyalgia and M.E. I'm sure I'm just having a flap but all of a sudden I feel like my life's so crazy how am I going to manage a baby in amoung it all, I can't believe I have fallen pregnant the same month I got a pup!! I know I absolutely will manage (and I can't wait for this baby) but reality of how exhausting life is going to be has really hit home tonight!! Anyone else had a "OMG how am I going to manage" moment??

 

[Lisa2701]

Flap over!! It's been a long day as I have an exam in a few days and been studying like crazy so I'm really exhausted, the pup was running riot and because I've done nothing but study recently I felt like the house was upside down. Spending time with my family and dogs is top of my priority list and I feel like I've barely spoken to them in the last week with having to study so much, just need to get this exam over with! Definietely going to postpone my last module as its a big one and I'd have an exam like this one just a couple of months after baby is born and I don't want to feel like im missing out on the baby for the sake of something that can come later. Having brought some order to the Craziness of my thoughts/housework I am feeling much more relaxed and at ease I'm blaming the hormones

 

[Mintastic]

Your life sounds a bit busier than mine at the moment but absolutely. I also fell pregnant more quickly than I expected (NOT complaining at all - was just surprised) and am worried about school, finances, my dog, the state of my apartment, the size of my apartment, how we can possibly find and afford a bigger place in time (this place is big enough for a baby who can sleep in our room with us but not for a child to have his/her own room), etc...

We have a trainer coming for my dog for the first time tomorrow actually which is great in a way but that is just another expense to worry about too!

I will actually be completing my coursework JUST in time! If baby is early I am screwed. Then I have to take my boards in August when baby will be 3 months old - but I figure if I am not working outside the home at all during that time it will be okay to study when baby is sleeping or when DH is watching him/her. Not having another child obviously makes my situation a little easier. If I totally bunk up my exam I will have one more shot at it in November 2015.

I figure it will be tough but we have all these pregnant months to keep working on the plan while things are still calmish. Hopefully it is all very very worth it!

By the way I work with autistic children and teens for a living

I love my dog so much and hate hate hate when people suggest I give her up but is there any family member who could maybe take the puppy, if even temporarily to help you out?

 

[Lisa2701]

Your life sounds a bit busier than mine at the moment but absolutely. I also fell pregnant more quickly than I expected (NOT complaining at all - was just surprised) and am worried about school, finances, my dog, the state of my apartment, the size of my apartment, how we can possibly find and afford a bigger place in time (this place is big enough for a baby who can sleep in our room with us but not for a child to have his/her own room), etc...

We have a trainer coming for my dog for the first time tomorrow actually which is great in a way but that is just another expense to worry about too!

I will actually be completing my coursework JUST in time! If baby is early I am screwed. Then I have to take my boards in August when baby will be 3 months old - but I figure if I am not working outside the home at all during that time it will be okay to study when baby is sleeping or when DH is watching him/her. Not having another child obviously makes my situation a little easier. If I totally bunk up my exam I will have one more shot at it in November 2015.

I figure it will be tough but we have all these pregnant months to keep working on the plan while things are still calmish. Hopefully it is all very very worth it!

By the way I work with autistic children and teens for a living

I love my dog so much and hate hate hate when people suggest I give her up but is there any family member who could maybe take the puppy, if even temporarily to help you out?

Aw so nice to know I'm not the only one having a bit of a panic! I've wanted this for SO long that I almost felt bad for feeling the way I did.

I too will need to move house but figure baby can be in my room till its 18 months if it needs to. There's no way I'd ask my DS to share his room which I'm sure you'll understand if you work with people on the spectrum (my husband also has aspergers). I'm hoping that my sons autism support worker will give us a letter to support the fact he can't share a room and we need re-housed.

I too should be finished all except one uni modules JUST in time but of baby comes early I'll need to defer my exam but Its not an overly dofficult module I'll be working on at the time so I should be ok.

As for the pup, yeah my mum could possibly take him for a couple of weeks however Unless there is real reason to then I probably won't as I need to get into a routine of things asap after baby born and better trying to eatablish it while hubby on paternity leave. I am lucky though in that I am friends witch a dog behaviouralist and also a recent Crufts obedience winner so I have lots of support to get his behaviour sorted. My older two are very well behaved so they don't concern me, just because the pup will be so young and hitting his teenage stage and he's already quite head strong and only 9 weeks old!. Have already decided to have the pup neutered at 6 months to prevent him ever hitting puberty, I don't usually like to do that but I think I'll have to in order to help prevent any difficult behaviours which I'd usually have the time to deal with but with a baby I won't have. Going to get an all terain pram so I can try walk the energy out of him and get me back in shape lol.

As you said it will be tough but I guarantee you that it will be worth all of it like you said we have the rest of our pregnancies to plan how to cope with it all.

 

[CanadianMaple]

After facing IF for a few years and finally being pregnant, I'm terrified. I'm hoping that my first ultrasound tomorrow will help me feel more settled. I'm doing this as a single parent now and that is definitely a part of the fear.

 

[SoBlessedMama]

I am a teacher, my husband is a football coach, we have a 4 year old, and I am due in about 2 weeks (smack in the middle of football season where DH works 18 hour days.) I panic on a daily basis lol.

It will be crazy, but as you said, you will make it work. Don't feel bad for questioning the "how." I don't think anyone can ever be 100% prepared. : )

One of my very best friends has two kids on the spectrum, and I used to teach adaptive phys ed classes for autistic students at my school. It sounds like you're doing a great job of anticipating what your little guy needs, and I'm sure you will work out all the details just fine. : ) I hope it is a smooth transition for your whole family! Congratulations on your pregnancy! : )

 

[Mintastic]

Glad you are feeling better about things Lisa (I think you typed your update while I was typing).

CanadianMaple - I have actually read some of your journal and older posts (sorry to have been a silent stalker) - congrats on your pregnancy! It is totally understandable that you would be scared now without your husband. Good luck on your ultrasound tomorrow!

 

[george83]

My goodness I think you ladies just put my panic into a bit of perspective, I'm 8 weeks with our third and our youngest is only 8 months old. I think everyday about how we're going to cope with a third so close to our second and financially how we'll cope - I was hoping to be back at work for a year before we even started trying for this baby to build back up our savings etc. but I guess in reality my life is pretty simple compared to yours! Good luck with everything ladies, I'm sure you'll cope brilliantly x x

 

[Lisa2701]

I am so glad I submitted this post, I almost didn't because I thought people might think "stupid woman for getting pregnant when life's so busy" but then like I said we had tried for so long previously that I never ever expected it to happen this quickly and to be honest I am surprised it did from the fact I ovulated VERY early (CD9) and DH was really ill and I had told him not to worry about this month but he insisted but it meant it literally happened the once this cycle, which I know is all it takes but still

After facing IF for a few years and finally being pregnant, I'm terrified. I'm hoping that my first ultrasound tomorrow will help me feel more settled. I'm doing this as a single parent now and that is definitely a part of the fear.

Canadian I've just read your signature, I am so so sorry for you loss. There is something really amazing about the fact you are still going to carry on his legacy

I am a teacher, my husband is a football coach, we have a 4 year old, and I am due in about 2 weeks (smack in the middle of football season where DH works 18 hour days.) I panic on a daily basis lol.

It will be crazy, but as you said, you will make it work. Don't feel bad for questioning the "how." I don't think anyone can ever be 100% prepared. : )

One of my very best friends has two kids on the spectrum, and I used to teach adaptive phys ed classes for autistic students at my school. It sounds like you're doing a great job of anticipating what your little guy needs, and I'm sure you will work out all the details just fine. : ) I hope it is a smooth transition for your whole family! Congratulations on your pregnancy! : )

I'm sure you will make it work. Is your 4 year old excited to get a sibling? Does your DH get paternity leave at all?

I am pretty sure my DS will be ok. He is pretty high functioning and with a lot of support manages mainstream school. He has wanted a sibling for years, infact just yesterday he said to me "I'm never going to get a brother or sister am I?" Little does he know his only issue is the crying as he has extremely sensitive hearing, but we will manage that and that exactly why he needs his own room to escape to when/if things gets too much for him. I think as long as he has his own quiet space then everything will be fine. As soon as we've had our 12 weeks scan I will alert his school and his autism outreach support team which is in his school and will work to prepare him best we can. I am thinking to take him to the scans so he can see baby and I might pay for a 4D scan later on in pregnancy so he can really process the whole baby bit.

My goodness I think you ladies just put my panic into a bit of perspective, I'm 8 weeks with our third and our youngest is only 8 months old. I think everyday about how we're going to cope with a third so close to our second and financially how we'll cope - I was hoping to be back at work for a year before we even started trying for this baby to build back up our savings etc. but I guess in reality my life is pretty simple compared to yours! Good luck with everything ladies, I'm sure you'll cope brilliantly x x

My friend has a 2year old, a 1 year old and is now 15 weeks pregnant - all planned! I bet your little ones will be great play mates for each other once they are bigger. I guess everyone will have their own obstacles they have to overcome. There will be people out there is worse situations than me and many people worse off than them, but it doesn't change the fact I'm going to be exhausted, and your the same, just because Someone else's life might sound busier/tougher doesn't change your reality and how your feeling about things. If that makes sense? I am sure you will do great though!!

 

[kit603]

It's definitely not just you hun

We'd been trying for just over 5 years when we got our and although we are absolutely over the moon and this is everything I've wanted, I definitely still do have my moments of panic!

I'm mostly worried about the financial side of things - we're both working full-time but mine is the higher paid job so when I go on maternity leave it's going to be a huge drop in income and, from what I've read, I don't think we'll qualify for child tax/working tax credits etc. I think all we'll get is statutory maternity pay, child benefit and DH's income.

We bought our first house last year and already had kids in mind, so the house is the perfect size for a growing family and we have a spare room ready to be nursery but it's not going to be much fun trying to cover the bills, mortgage, insurances and baby costs on maternity pay.

I'm in the middle of completing a degree as well, but I'm doing it through Open University because I work full time so I'm not as worried about attending classes and things because most tutorials are online and the 'In person' ones are optional. However, my final exam for my last module is going to be in the first 2 weks of june (date not confirmed yet) and I'm going to be due around 2nd to 7th June.

The thought of the dogs stresses me out a little too... we have two Labradors and they're not perfect (we definitely won't be doing obedience any time soon ) but they're not bad dogs either. They're well behaved in the house and they know the basics - sit, stay, paw, don't do your business in the house etc but they've not been socialised with children at all so I'm not sure what to expect with baby. They can be a handful when we have guests - they don't jump up but they are very bouncy and clumsy. They're a handful when we walk them too - Jake isn't bad really, but Bella is an absolute nightmare. That's definitely our fault because they were mainly walked off lead until they were around 1 and they didn't get used to leads as young as they should have.

Hoping they surprise us and that the finances work out better than im expecting!

 

[SoBlessedMama]

I am so glad I submitted this post, I almost didn't because I thought people might think "stupid woman for getting pregnant when life's so busy" but then like I said we had tried for so long previously that I never ever expected it to happen this quickly and to be honest I am surprised it did from the fact I ovulated VERY early (CD9) and DH was really ill and I had told him not to worry about this month but he insisted but it meant it literally happened the once this cycle, which I know is all it takes but still

After facing IF for a few years and finally being pregnant, I'm terrified. I'm hoping that my first ultrasound tomorrow will help me feel more settled. I'm doing this as a single parent now and that is definitely a part of the fear.

Canadian I've just read your signature, I am so so sorry for you loss. There is something really amazing about the fact you are still going to carry on his legacy

I am a teacher, my husband is a football coach, we have a 4 year old, and I am due in about 2 weeks (smack in the middle of football season where DH works 18 hour days.) I panic on a daily basis lol.

It will be crazy, but as you said, you will make it work. Don't feel bad for questioning the "how." I don't think anyone can ever be 100% prepared. : )

One of my very best friends has two kids on the spectrum, and I used to teach adaptive phys ed classes for autistic students at my school. It sounds like you're doing a great job of anticipating what your little guy needs, and I'm sure you will work out all the details just fine. : ) I hope it is a smooth transition for your whole family! Congratulations on your pregnancy! : )

I'm sure you will make it work. Is your 4 year old excited to get a sibling? Does your DH get paternity leave at all?

I am pretty sure my DS will be ok. He is pretty high functioning and with a lot of support manages mainstream school. He has wanted a sibling for years, infact just yesterday he said to me "I'm never going to get a brother or sister am I?" Little does he know his only issue is the crying as he has extremely sensitive hearing, but we will manage that and that exactly why he needs his own room to escape to when/if things gets too much for him. I think as long as he has his own quiet space then everything will be fine. As soon as we've had our 12 weeks scan I will alert his school and his autism outreach support team which is in his school and will work to prepare him best we can. I am thinking to take him to the scans so he can see baby and I might pay for a 4D scan later on in pregnancy so he can really process the whole baby bit.

My goodness I think you ladies just put my panic into a bit of perspective, I'm 8 weeks with our third and our youngest is only 8 months old. I think everyday about how we're going to cope with a third so close to our second and financially how we'll cope - I was hoping to be back at work for a year before we even started trying for this baby to build back up our savings etc. but I guess in reality my life is pretty simple compared to yours! Good luck with everything ladies, I'm sure you'll cope brilliantly x x

My friend has a 2year old, a 1 year old and is now 15 weeks pregnant - all planned! I bet your little ones will be great play mates for each other once they are bigger. I guess everyone will have their own obstacles they have to overcome. There will be people out there is worse situations than me and many people worse off than them, but it doesn't change the fact I'm going to be exhausted, and your the same, just because Someone else's life might sound busier/tougher doesn't change your reality and how your feeling about things. If that makes sense? I am sure you will do great though!!

I LOVE that you submitted this post, because it makes me feel like we are all in this together. : )

Yes, my DS is SUPER excited to get a little brother. : ) I really hope he stays excited when baby actually gets here lol! DH does have days he can take off, but when baby is born, he will only be able to take off about 3 days. And during those 3 days, he will still have to leave in the evenings so he can run his practices and games. (Which is ok--we have tons of family very close who are more than willing to help out.) : ) Then when I go back to work in January, he plans to take off at least a week and stay home with the boys. We are still working out all the details, but it is so exciting! : )

 

[CanadianMaple]

I just found out today it wasn't meant to be. Blighted ovum. Waiting to miscarry. I think my gut told me something was wrong and that's why I was feeling so panicked and scared about this pregnancy.

 

[Mintastic]

So very sorry to hear that CanadianMaple. Thinking of you in this difficult time.

 

[Lisa2701]

It's definitely not just you hun

We'd been trying for just over 5 years when we got our and although we are absolutely over the moon and this is everything I've wanted, I definitely still do have my moments of panic!

I'm mostly worried about the financial side of things - we're both working full-time but mine is the higher paid job so when I go on maternity leave it's going to be a huge drop in income and, from what I've read, I don't think we'll qualify for child tax/working tax credits etc. I think all we'll get is statutory maternity pay, child benefit and DH's income.

We bought our first house last year and already had kids in mind, so the house is the perfect size for a growing family and we have a spare room ready to be nursery but it's not going to be much fun trying to cover the bills, mortgage, insurances and baby costs on maternity pay.

I'm in the middle of completing a degree as well, but I'm doing it through Open University because I work full time so I'm not as worried about attending classes and things because most tutorials are online and the 'In person' ones are optional. However, my final exam for my last module is going to be in the first 2 weks of june (date not confirmed yet) and I'm going to be due around 2nd to 7th June.

The thought of the dogs stresses me out a little too... we have two Labradors and they're not perfect (we definitely won't be doing obedience any time soon ) but they're not bad dogs either. They're well behaved in the house and they know the basics - sit, stay, paw, don't do your business in the house etc but they've not been socialised with children at all so I'm not sure what to expect with baby. They can be a handful when we have guests - they don't jump up but they are very bouncy and clumsy. They're a handful when we walk them too - Jake isn't bad really, but Bella is an absolute nightmare. That's definitely our fault because they were mainly walked off lead until they were around 1 and they didn't get used to leads as young as they should have.

Hoping they surprise us and that the finances work out better than im expecting!

It's the OU that I'm studying through! I have a level 3 exam on Wednesday and begin a level 1&2 module at the end of the week, then I should be starting my final module (level 3) in January but I think I will postpone it and see if I can take the next sitting so I can be in a routine with baby first!

I am sure you will make the finances work! People have a way of working those things out!

Walk the dogs to the school gates at home time, that's get them used to kids we've been carrying the pup up to our sons school and allowing all the kids to clap him etc. I also have friends with young kids who I intend on taking the pup to socialise with. That said my eldest two aren't overly used to young children either but I don't really have any concerns over them. The blessing you have is yours are labs and gun dogs have great natures!! My eldest was 5 before we done any obedience training, he now competes at obedience so it's never too late to begin training

I am so glad I submitted this post, I almost didn't because I thought people might think "stupid woman for getting pregnant when life's so busy" but then like I said we had tried for so long previously that I never ever expected it to happen this quickly and to be honest I am surprised it did from the fact I ovulated VERY early (CD9) and DH was really ill and I had told him not to worry about this month but he insisted but it meant it literally happened the once this cycle, which I know is all it takes but still

After facing IF for a few years and finally being pregnant, I'm terrified. I'm hoping that my first ultrasound tomorrow will help me feel more settled. I'm doing this as a single parent now and that is definitely a part of the fear.

Canadian I've just read your signature, I am so so sorry for you loss. There is something really amazing about the fact you are still going to carry on his legacy

I am a teacher, my husband is a football coach, we have a 4 year old, and I am due in about 2 weeks (smack in the middle of football season where DH works 18 hour days.) I panic on a daily basis lol.

It will be crazy, but as you said, you will make it work. Don't feel bad for questioning the "how." I don't think anyone can ever be 100% prepared. : )

One of my very best friends has two kids on the spectrum, and I used to teach adaptive phys ed classes for autistic students at my school. It sounds like you're doing a great job of anticipating what your little guy needs, and I'm sure you will work out all the details just fine. : ) I hope it is a smooth transition for your whole family! Congratulations on your pregnancy! : )

I'm sure you will make it work. Is your 4 year old excited to get a sibling? Does your DH get paternity leave at all?

I am pretty sure my DS will be ok. He is pretty high functioning and with a lot of support manages mainstream school. He has wanted a sibling for years, infact just yesterday he said to me "I'm never going to get a brother or sister am I?" Little does he know his only issue is the crying as he has extremely sensitive hearing, but we will manage that and that exactly why he needs his own room to escape to when/if things gets too much for him. I think as long as he has his own quiet space then everything will be fine. As soon as we've had our 12 weeks scan I will alert his school and his autism outreach support team which is in his school and will work to prepare him best we can. I am thinking to take him to the scans so he can see baby and I might pay for a 4D scan later on in pregnancy so he can really process the whole baby bit.

My goodness I think you ladies just put my panic into a bit of perspective, I'm 8 weeks with our third and our youngest is only 8 months old. I think everyday about how we're going to cope with a third so close to our second and financially how we'll cope - I was hoping to be back at work for a year before we even started trying for this baby to build back up our savings etc. but I guess in reality my life is pretty simple compared to yours! Good luck with everything ladies, I'm sure you'll cope brilliantly x x

My friend has a 2year old, a 1 year old and is now 15 weeks pregnant - all planned! I bet your little ones will be great play mates for each other once they are bigger. I guess everyone will have their own obstacles they have to overcome. There will be people out there is worse situations than me and many people worse off than them, but it doesn't change the fact I'm going to be exhausted, and your the same, just because Someone else's life might sound busier/tougher doesn't change your reality and how your feeling about things. If that makes sense? I am sure you will do great though!!

I LOVE that you submitted this post, because it makes me feel like we are all in this together. : )

Yes, my DS is SUPER excited to get a little brother. : ) I really hope he stays excited when baby actually gets here lol! DH does have days he can take off, but when baby is born, he will only be able to take off about 3 days. And during those 3 days, he will still have to leave in the evenings so he can run his practices and games. (Which is ok--we have tons of family very close who are more than willing to help out.) : ) Then when I go back to work in January, he plans to take off at least a week and stay home with the boys. We are still working out all the details, but it is so exciting! : )

Aw when did you decide to tell your DS? Aw we haven't told our DS, I am desperate to tell him but scared in case it doesn't work out, plus I know once I tell him then the cat will be out the bag. I am sure he'll be super excited - although he told me today he didn't think he was getting a sibling today because old women can't have babies - I'm 29!!!!!

Glad hubby will be able to be around for a bit after baby's born

I just found out today it wasn't meant to be. Blighted ovum. Waiting to miscarry. I think my gut told me something was wrong and that's why I was feeling so panicked and scared about this pregnancy.

Canadian I don't know what to say, I'm devastated for you! I am so so sorry. I'm always here if you'd like someone to speak to

 

[SoBlessedMama]

Thinking of, and praying for you, Canadian. I can't imagine the heartbreak, and of course we are here for support and if you need to talk.

Lisa, we told DS when we shared the news with our families. (Just after 7 weeks.) I had miscarried 2 months before this BFP, so I was terrified of sharing the news. But, we had a great US at 7 weeks, and TBH, my reasoning was that a miscarriage beyond 2 months would be hard to hide, so we might as well let everyone know. (That sounds so bizarre now lol, but I wasn't exactly thinking clearly at the time.) Anyway, we told him when we told family, but I don't think he really understood it until we started turning our guest room into a nursery (around 16ish weeks.) That got him really excited, and I think it all clicked for him. : )

Lol you're most definitely not old (I'm 32!) but I laughed so hard when I read your DSs comment. Kids are shockingly honest!!

 

[Lisa2701]

You know my DH didn't want to tell a soul but I've said to him that if we lost this baby I would want the support of those around me so we have told my parents, sister and my best mate. We don't really speak to my OH's family, we will tell them at the same time as the extended family. I intend on paying for a scan at 8 weeks so assuming all is well at that point I might tell people after that. I actually can't wait!! Especially my son and my wee gran, I was at lunch with her the other day and it killed me to not be able to tell her.

Oh we've had a day of honesty from my DS today! He was playing the sims on the playstation and was creating a woman and turns to me and says "she's what people like to marry, she's slim, no offence mum!" so I'm old and fat apparently!! ironically I used to be a size 28 and in the last year I've gotten down to a size 16 (lost 11 stone/155lbs) and he used to tell me how much he loved my big belly, but NOW I'm fat its a good job I'm happy in myself or I might have needed therapy after today!

 

[SoBlessedMama]

Lol oh my goodness!!! That is too funny--there is no telling where they get things like that. My DS likes to stick his belly out (he is so lanky, that is hard work for him lol) and tell me that he looks like me.

Good for you with the weight loss!! That is amazing!

I totally understand the hesitancy to tell people. I would have preferred to wait until 2nd tri, but like you, I really thought I'd want the support if we had another loss. DH on the other hand, has never worried a day in his life about anything. He would've told people before the pee dried on the test if I'd let him lol.

 

[Lisa2701]

Lol oh my goodness!!! That is too funny--there is no telling where they get things like that. My DS likes to stick his belly out (he is so lanky, that is hard work for him lol) and tell me that he looks like me.

Good for you with the weight loss!! That is amazing!

I totally understand the hesitancy to tell people. I would have preferred to wait until 2nd tri, but like you, I really thought I'd want the support if we had another loss. DH on the other hand, has never worried a day in his life about anything. He would've told people before the pee dried on the test if I'd let him lol.

I have no idea where he got the idea that skinny women are what men want to marry

My DH is even more concerned than me, I find it quite hard because as well as worrying about how I'd cope with a loss I worry even more about he'd cope with it. He doesn't want to tell anyone, the only person he's desperate to tell is our DS. We have had 3 very early miscarriage previously (this is the furthest we've got since beginning TTC) so he's terrified it'll happen again, but I'm feeling a bit more confident this time round, don't know why.

 

[SoBlessedMama]

Lol oh my goodness!!! That is too funny--there is no telling where they get things like that. My DS likes to stick his belly out (he is so lanky, that is hard work for him lol) and tell me that he looks like me.

Good for you with the weight loss!! That is amazing!

I totally understand the hesitancy to tell people. I would have preferred to wait until 2nd tri, but like you, I really thought I'd want the support if we had another loss. DH on the other hand, has never worried a day in his life about anything. He would've told people before the pee dried on the test if I'd let him lol.

I have no idea where he got the idea that skinny women are what men want to marry

My DH is even more concerned than me, I find it quite hard because as well as worrying about how I'd cope with a loss I worry even more about he'd cope with it. He doesn't want to tell anyone, the only person he's desperate to tell is our DS. We have had 3 very early miscarriage previously (this is the furthest we've got since beginning TTC) so he's terrified it'll happen again, but I'm feeling a bit more confident this time round, don't know why.

I'm so sorry for your losses--that is hard enough to go through one time. I can't imagine 3. I'm sure that you both will be able to relax some the further along you get. I am a big worrier, and I had some spotting early on, which made it even worse. I think I finally started to relax a little around 24 weeks or so, when baby became viable. : ) But really, the stress never leaves. Even once they're here, it is just a whole new set or worries, isn't it? I think it all comes along with being parents. I hope you and hubby can relax soon enough and enjoy the pregnancy! : )

 

[Lisa2701]

Like you said, even once they are born you still have concerns, they are just different.

My previous losses were chemicals, all 3 times I got a BFP (but not on a digi) and the next day or two I started bleeding. One time I had to call my husband home from work and was rushed into hospital because he came home to find me doubled in two with pain, blood all over the floor and all over me - it was literally pouring out of me (sorry TMI). There was no explaination given to us about that, they just said that "IF" I had been pregnant then I wasn't anymore according to my bloods, I was given medication to stop the bleeding and sent home. This is why my husband is so scared.

Anyways, I'm trying not to worry about that. This is the first time (since my DS) that my hormones were high enough to be picked up by a DIGI, and the DIGI has moved from 'pregnant 1-2' to 'pregnant 2-3' so obviousky things are going ok so far. I think my mind will be settled a lot if all is well at the 8 week scan. I read that once you see your babies heartbeat on an US your chances of miscarriage fall to 3% so I can't wait to see that little heart beat!!

How have you kept during your pregnancy? You must be excited to meet your LO? Do you know what your having or have you kept it a surprise?