Anyone else trying to convince Hubby for another baby?

[Belle]

ladies,
Hope your well?
I am currently trying to convince my husband into trying for baby number 3. At the moment he's not having any of it
But I feel recently since going on about it ALOT that we may have ever so slighlty turned a corner. ( This being he humors me know when i talk about what i want etc) He has listened to my reasons and i have also listened to his but we've kinda just got oursleves stuck, i still want to try he does not
Anyone else having this problem with the OH's or been there and got anywhere?
Any advice? Should i just not have number 3 cuz it makes him happy?

 

[Wombat]

I am with you on this one girl!

Exactly the same thing, already to kids, I want another one, DH doesn't.
I listened to him, he listened to me and we are stuck...
Decided to wait a couple of years and then talk again.

I really want another one! If I could I would have 10 (probably!)

 

[Belle]

I only want 1 more, my youngest will be 2 in September and i really want another while she is young. The age gap between my son and daughter is 4years and i don't want that this time!
I dont know what to say now to get him to see that waiting just isn't an option 4 me!!
Good luck with yours!!

 

[Mamabel]

Hi gals, what a great post!

I am a success story, but it took me four years to win this argument! We have two girls, now ages 6 & 8, and I turned 40 last year. The biological clock is ticking. He finally relented when I broke down crying. I explained that if we don't have baby #3, I will definitely have to go to therapy, because in my mind, she is a real person, and just not here yet. To not have her would be like losing a child. Not making this up or exaggerating. She is a part of me and has to join our family.

I can honestly say that not having her would have damaged our 10-year marriage. Maybe that's extreme, but it's just how I've felt since the day I gave birth to my 2nd daughter. I just knew there was one more to come.

Now the bad part: got pregnant in February, and he was really lukewarm. Miscarried on April 1st, and he was okay, but not really someone I could go to with all my sadness. Thank god for girlfriends and this forum. He's an excellent dad and a great guy, don't get me wrong. But, it will definitely be a bummer to go through the last pregnancy with such a lukewarm partner. However, he's assured me that once she gets here, he will be fine, and I believe him. The whole pregnancy thing, he just doesn't get it, and I have to let that be okay. But it does make it a bit lonelier for me to not be able to rely on him to share every detail with me. Good news: my 8-year-old will be a great pregnancy buddy, and she is super-psyched. We will try again mid-July, and I'm sure it will all work out.

Hang in there and keep thinking of your baby to be!

 

[Barbles]

I have a feeling I'll be in this situation, Ive always wanted lots of children but for house/money reasons that wouldnt have been possible but we could comfortably fit three in our new house. I am WTT for my second at the moment, OH is not really enthusiastic about it but he is the type that once the baby is actually here, he will get excited, he finds it hard to get excited about stuff that isnt happening yet.
He keeps saying that once we have the second it isnt going to take long for me to start asking for just 'one more'. I keep saying I wont but who knows? I think if we most definatly didnt have the room I would be ok but I know there is the spare room (planning to make playroom then office when the kids are older) so if it did happen it wouldnt be the worst.
He says he's having the snip after the second anyways but does this longing for more children ever go away? I didnt even like being pregnant lols (I was not a glowing and blooming person, more like the life was sucked out of me. I looked better 2 days after I gave birth )

 

[babyblog]

This is something i think i will face! We have agreed that we will try for another baby, probably next year but my OH is adamant he wants only 2.

I only have one brother, he has one sister and think it is because that is what he knows. I was speaking to my mum about this yesterday and she was making me really thnk about it.She said she would have liked to have had 3 children, but was so busy with my bro and me that they didn't get around to it. She also agreed with some of the points my OH made-children deman alot of time, and perhaps it is nicer to share that 2 ways rather than 3.My parents have also helped me and my bro out alot when growing up-they bougth us both cars and helped towards uni costs, they have also given us both money towards our houses.I know this is a luxury-not a necssary but it did make me think actually i would like to do the same for my children so perhaps 2 is better than 3! Also things like holidays or days out, family tickets are generally 2 adults and 2 kids, would have to get a bigger car with three children.

As you can see i'm having to convince myself!

I realy don't think there is much you can do to convince your partner, if they only want 2 then i guess that is to be respected. However, i wonder if time will help-i think what i'll do is have a sceond baby (hopefully) and then be happy with that.If in a few years, i find myself reallt broody i may raise the subject when the older two are at school?

How old are your children by the way?

 

[Belle]

Mamabel! Therapy is what i feel i need! Its getting soooo bad now! My life just does not feel complete, i just can see myself with 3!
Babyblog, my husband says all the things you have about families of 2 children are better off etc but still this does not budge my feelings! My children are 5 1/2 and 19months. Despite the 4year age gap between them they are very close but i just feel i want 1 sooner and not have such a big age gap.

 

[babyblog]

I hope you workl things out your way !

 

[CandyApple19]

Ben is the same, he said to me, "when we're ready for another baby (this means when he makes up his mind..) we're NTNP. Now having come off the depo he was still in that frame of mind but cause my body isnt co operating with me like i need it to were holding off til further notice....

 

[rebecca_2012]

i have a little boy whos four and been trying to convice my partner to have another baby for the last year and he keeps on ssaying no that we should wait another 5 years and i dont want to wait so any ideas please

 

[MummyToAmberx]

Haha... sounds like OH... i know deep down he does want another, he'd love a son just as much as me ( have 2 girls ) if we'd had 1 of each probably be different matter.

My OH mainly fussed about cost & crying so nothing major really.

kinda agreed on 2014 for having the baby oldest be in full time school, youngest part time almost full time school.

 

[andypandy2]

Hi girls...I reitterate that....a great thread.

Men hey!!!!

I have 2 girls. One who has just turned 4 and one who is 2 and a bit. There are basically 21 months between them and they get on great and love one another to bits!!!

I would however love another baby and ideally would have concieved recently so as to again have a small gap and be a close family, but, other half basically equals other ideas. He thinks that we should wait and leave a larger gap, purely because my youngest can be a monkey!

I do love and respect my husband, but the wait is driving me potty. Not only because my husband works long hours and actually in the grand scheme of things i do most of the leg work with the girls and deal with little one when she IS a monkey, but also because my husband wants sex all the time (with contraception) where as my head is in 'no i want to do this for baby making' mode.

Don't get me wrong we don't get into arguments or anything and i should be glad DH does want to have another.... but i just want to do it yesterday like any woman haha

 

[MummyToAmberx]

Hi girls...I reitterate that....a great thread.

Men hey!!!!

I have 2 girls. One who has just turned 4 and one who is 2 and a bit. There are basically 21 months between them and they get on great and love one another to bits!!!

I would however love another baby and ideally would have concieved recently so as to again have a small gap and be a close family, but, other half basically equals other ideas. He thinks that we should wait and leave a larger gap, purely because my youngest can be a monkey!

I do love and respect my husband, but the wait is driving me potty. Not only because my husband works long hours and actually in the grand scheme of things i do most of the leg work with the girls and deal with little one when she IS a monkey, but also because my husband wants sex all the time (with contraception) where as my head is in 'no i want to do this for baby making' mode.

Don't get me wrong we don't get into arguments or anything and i should be glad DH does want to have another.... but i just want to do it yesterday like any woman haha

Sound like me, my two, were born 31st dec 07 & 13th dec 09 lol

My youngest is a devil, another reason that puts my OH off.

 

[goddess25]

I am afraid not. I am currently trying to convince my husband that having a 3rd child is a good idea, he is not convinced and I am not sure I can bring him round.

 

[goddess25]

To the OP did your hubby come round?

 

[andypandy2]

Hi girls...I reitterate that....a great thread.

Men hey!!!!

I have 2 girls. One who has just turned 4 and one who is 2 and a bit. There are basically 21 months between them and they get on great and love one another to bits!!!

I would however love another baby and ideally would have concieved recently so as to again have a small gap and be a close family, but, other half basically equals other ideas. He thinks that we should wait and leave a larger gap, purely because my youngest can be a monkey!

I do love and respect my husband, but the wait is driving me potty. Not only because my husband works long hours and actually in the grand scheme of things i do most of the leg work with the girls and deal with little one when she IS a monkey, but also because my husband wants sex all the time (with contraception) where as my head is in 'no i want to do this for baby making' mode.

Don't get me wrong we don't get into arguments or anything and i should be glad DH does want to have another.... but i just want to do it yesterday like any woman haha

Sound like me, my two, were born 31st dec 07 & 13th dec 09 lol

My youngest is a devil, another reason that puts my OH off.

Sure my husband forgets that you have to add 9 months onto the equation! x

 

[sun]

I know this is an old thread - but I wonder if the OP ever got anywhere with her OH? We're in the same boat - I want 3 and OH only wants 2 and he is adamant about it. I feel like 3 kiddos is what I'm meant to have and I think I would feel like something was missing. I love our family but it doesn't feel complete quite yet! x

 

[lepaskilf]

I'm trying to pluck up the courage to even mention the thought of having #2 with OH!! Our 1st wasn't planned and we never really thought about having children but we love Tom to bits and my OH is completely smitten with him but he's adamant he doesn't want anymore as he thinks that we won't be able to enjoy the things we like to do, like go for bike rides and camping, as much if we had another!

Those with 2, can you give me some ammunition to fire at my OH? Was the jump from 1 to 2 that different??!!

 

[creamnshugar]

i am in the same situation. I am ready for #3 but he is not... i told him i was to ttc in june and he says ok for now until june comes when he will probably change his mind my youngest will be 5 in december and my oldest will be 8 this May... it is time lol. He says we cant afford another baby but if we went by that we wouldnt have our first two either lol....

 

[goddess25]

The jump is quite big I thought from 1 to 2. I remember back to the 'hard' days with 1 child and now think how incredibly easy that would be. Just as I imagine I will think that if I manage to convince DH into #3.

Like you Sun I do not feel our family is complete but my hubby is adamant that its not happening. I keep thinking I am making some headway but I think in reality he has just stopped answering back but his decision is the same.