Anyone give up a good career to be a SAHM?

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by brownlieB, Oct 1, 2013.

  1. brownlieB

    brownlieB Mummy of 1

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    Hi all,

    A little background. My DD is 3 and I am pregnant with #2. I'm a qualified nurse and have been for 7 years now. Initially when DD was born I went back to work part time, but then for money reasons I had to go back full time.

    While I hated putting her in nursery so often, and feeling I was missing out I made myself feel better that if I didn't we wouldn't have a roof over our heads etc. DH was at university (after being made redundant) so I got on with it, and got used to it.

    Eventually I got myself a promotion as a specialist nurse, and my hours although full time still were a more stable mon-fri 8:30-16:30 rather than shift work, with weekends and holidays inc.

    DH finished uni and has got himself a decent job now I am pregnant again I could work part time again, after mat leave, though Working Tax credits wise there's not much in it between not working at all and being part time. With my part time wages and his full time we still earn too much to be entitled to any help. Basically i'd be working to pay for the nursery fees. The only benefit is that I keep my registration.

    I can re-train if I do not re new my registration after 2yrs so it's not all completely wasted. It will be an 18 month return to practice course.

    I just wonder how any other mummies who were in good jobs/ careers felt when they chose to give it all up? does a little bit yearn for work again? Or did you quit and never look back?
     
  2. BabyPrayers21

    BabyPrayers21 Well-Known Member

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    Im not sure if my story will be of much help for you but here it is......I was a preschool teacher at an inner city and hated the school I was at. I loved teaching but I had gone from a private center to inner city and things were bad. Anyway, I was engaged at the time and on vacation celebrating with my now DH and his two children when I got the call that the school would be shutting down. A blessing and a curse all at the same time. We were struggling to have someone to meet the kids at the bus stop each day, I cried everyday I had to work and we were planning our wedding. So we sat down and weighed out the pros and cons. Basically it came down too a similar situation to yours were my income would be going solely to child care. We decided that we would rather have me home with the kids rather than a stranger watching them at some program with a ton of other children. So I am now a SAHM. Some days I love that I have no where I have to be. I am able to make the kids breakfast and take them to the bus and while they are at school I am a trainer at a Kickboxing gym and I workout and get things done around the house. Other days I wish I had a job or that I was at least pregnant with our first baby together so there would be more purpose to my being home. It takes some adjusting but you will have two lil ones and it will allow for you to see them reach each milestone and not hear about it from the daycare. Good luck in your decision.
     
  3. nevernormal

    nevernormal Mom to precious Levi

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    It just depends on how you feel about having a career in general, I think. I ended up being laid off from my part-time job when I was 10 weeks pregnant, and we'd always planned for me to be a SAHM, so that was easy enough (though those months of wages until he was born would've been nice!). I didn't have a real career, and wasn't necessarily pursuing one at the time. However, right before I got pregnant, we'd reached 2 years TTC and I was done, ready to give up and move on to something else. I would've been laid off anyway, it wasn't because I was pregnant, and I was actually offered a couple of jobs while pregnant that paid a lot more but I would have to commit to going back to work after he was born.

    So the theoretical situation, had I not been pregnant, I would've taken a better job, and worked full time. And no matter what, if I'd gotten pregnant, we would've tried our hardest for me to be a SAHM when the baby came. But that's because a career has never ever been, and never will be, a priority for me. A job is a job, it pays the bills, but that's it. I know without a doubt I would've been in the "quit and never looked back" category. I LOVE being at home with him, and I know it was the right choice for our family. If you're thinking that you still want to work as a nurse long-term, then it sounds like you'll have to consider whether or not you want to do the retraining, or if you enjoy working enough to continue doing it now, even if it's just paying childcare.
     
  4. Amber3

    Amber3 Well-Known Member

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    I am a SAHM WHO does occasionally look back. I did not have a great career but I did have a job which I liked and I have sometimes really missed it. But I feel convinced that it is good for my child that I am at home with her the first years and since I hope we will have more children I am trying to learn to LOVE being a SAHM;)

    Best wishes, Amber
     
  5. embeth

    embeth Mum to 4 perfect children

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    I am a qualified teacher. When I had my first almost 7 years ago we decided we wanted 2 close together so I made the decision not to go back got pregnant 17 month age ago and then went back when my second was 14
    Months. Just part time. Was hard getting back into it at first but this would have been my 5 th year back teaching now worked out really well and I've been around for my two eldest through the pre sch years. Xx
     

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