Anyone with 4+ children how do you cope?

[Oldermummy78]

Hello, I'm just wondering how you lady's are coping if you have 4,5,6+ children?

I am ntnp but actually possible ttc more than I thought so this has got me thinking, how do you girls manage? This is actually getting me thinking And would we cope? Would I be to stressed would I not have enough time for the ones We have ?? Also I was very sick with my first 3 and my 4th was so ill and ended up being depressed during my pregnancy,
So obv now it's starting to become a reality I'm thinking way ahead of if we was to be blessed with a 5th baby, how would I cope? We just about manage now and the first 3 dad doesn't see them whatsoever , this is my husbands first we had in 2011 and hoping for another one day
Just liking for women in a similar situation that worried and managed or worried didn't manage, would help to hear your story's I'm sure it's a natural worry I just don't want added pressure on my little family I love them all so much and would a new one, I just want what's best for them that's here not worse x

 

[Oldermummy78]

Anyone or I the only one thinking way ahead?

 

[cass2615]

hi oldermummy, i cant speak my own experience as im currently a mum of 2 however i do have friends with larger familys such as yourself and i often asked how do you do it ? i love children and always knew i wanted to be a mum im the middle of 3 so didnt come from larger family etc, so mums i know with 4 and more told me the babies after just fitted into routine ,they both said its all about the routine ,id say you have a strong routine now to consider extending further and your worry is like you say is natural ,how old are your children ? my friends had children of various ages and older ones would enjoy helping out whether that was with baby or younger siblings freeing them up to care for the new baby, if your worried express this worry with your husband afterall he knows you better than most and will know if your manage ,i think you will why you might ask because your worry is if you extend will you manage to care for the children you already have ,means most important thing to you is family ,you will make it work

hope this helps a little i know im not someone with personal experience but do have close friends

 

[Oldermummy78]

hi oldermummy, i cant speak my own experience as im currently a mum of 2 however i do have friends with larger familys such as yourself and i often asked how do you do it ? i love children and always knew i wanted to be a mum im the middle of 3 so didnt come from larger family etc, so mums i know with 4 and more told me the babies after just fitted into routine ,they both said its all about the routine ,id say you have a strong routine now to consider extending further and your worry is like you say is natural ,how old are your children ? my friends had children of various ages and older ones would enjoy helping out whether that was with baby or younger siblings freeing them up to care for the new baby, if your worried express this worry with your husband afterall he knows you better than most and will know if your manage ,i think you will why you might ask because your worry is if you extend will you manage to care for the children you already have ,means most important thing to you is family ,you will make it work

hope this helps a little i know im not someone with personal experience but do have close friends

Thanks you

That is very informative and yes kind of how I felt I just need to hear it from people with like yourself knowledge of friends of larger family or them themselves.
Just worried my kids would suffer what if oh were to lose his job on the future etc just worry a really I should just take one day at a time
I have 2 teens then 10 and 3 already
Just really don't want to take away from them by being selfish and having another xx

 

[cass2615]

your welcome think worry about future is there whether you have smaller or larger family ,im ttc #3 and my partner is the earner and if he was to lose his job how we would manage , but you would find a way motherly instinct to protect would kick in stronger than ever as im sure your partners fatherly instincts would ,the biggest thing children want and need is free and thats love

 

[Oldermummy78]

Same here atm it was I either go back to work now part time or we have another soon, with my clock ticking I really don't want to leave it to long, as dh wants another so bad he has been asking since our little boy was few mths old
Your right though as long as we can love and keep a roof over there heads they will be fine , just hope I can relax and not stress so much good luck with your

 

[cass2615]

same here id had intended returning back to work fulltime now our youngest is nearly 5 however ive always said i wanted my family completed before a certain age and i dont like odd numbers so looking at fitting two more blessings in 4 years yikes lol it was put on back burner due to oh work wasnt very good job and we was struggling money wise to support the two children we had ,but he got a new job ,we had relationship break so ofc when we got back together was working on us and our two boys , hes just recieved promotion so we decided to go for it

we talked about it and mutually decided we wasnt done yet

wish you all best for your bfp also

 

[Cornfieldland]

Hi there, I don't have the same situation, but I have similar feelings. I did come from a family with 4 kids, I was the oldest and my mom said after you have 3 it doesn't make much difference
I have 2 boys ages 15, 11 and having a baby now scares me too. I'm 37 and would be starting all over again, that scares me. Can I handle a baby, do I have the energy? What if my husband loses his job? It's so scary! I still have to work if we have a baby and child care is expensive...it goes on and on. But my husband and I have no children together and it would be his only if we do. I want it so bad, but it's easier not to have one. Head verse Heart, but my heart wants a baby.

 

[Oldermummy78]

That's it Hun it's more of the case for hubby, I don't want to get to old for it to happen and regret letting him have the chance
Good luck for you on your

 

[cass2615]

thankyou ,now to relax ive done what i can for this month what will be will be with regards to whether af comes or not

 

[Oldermummy78]

Exactly sit back and relax and enjoy the tww

 

[cass2615]

yeah that dreaded tww im such inpatient person its so hard for me to wait to test ,just hoping it doesnt take aslong as it did to conceive my second that was 3 year long journey

 

[Oldermummy78]

Hopefully not Hun x

 

[busytulip]

Hi Oldermummy :wave: My DH and I have 3 boys, 3 girls and 1 angel baby. I don't think it matters how many children you have, or hope to have, the worry will always be there. I think as moms it's very easy for us to feel like we aren't good enough, or giving of ourselves enough. The very fact that you have asked yourself if you can manage and you are trying to predict the impact of having another baby on your family speaks volumes as to what kind of mother you are.

Feel free to mssg me or ask some specifics. Good luck to you!

 

[Oldermummy78]

Wow busy tulip 3 of each
Are you hoping for another also?

Thanks so much that's lovely and if you don't mind can I add you to my friends as I am sure I will have many questions soon enough lol

Thanks all for your responses it has helped me come to terms with the idea I'm not just being selfish
Xx

 

[busytulip]

We are hoping for another. There is a 6 year gap between our youngest and the next one up and our youngest lost her twin so we feel really strongly that we'd love for her to have a sibling close in age. I don't mind being added at all

 

[Oldermummy78]

So sorry for your loss
That would be a lovely idea for your little girl
Let's hope the Bfp come strong and fast girls

 

[Oldermummy78]

And thank you Hun I got you