are there any parents on here with a teen who has ADHD?

[princesspie]

Hi all, this is my first time on this part of the forum, My 15 year od son has ADHD/ADD. im at my wits end!!! he is making mine,my husbands and 3 other childrens life a missery!! he is stealing, lieing, getting agressive ect. i cant go on like this, i dont know what to do any more!!! he is bigger than me and i simply cant control him any more. just wondered if any one else is going through anything like this with a teen?

 

[whitelilly]

does your son also have a diagnosis of conduct disorder and is he on medication?

 

[princesspie]

sorry hun, i dont know what conduct disorder is and no he isnt on meds, he was a few yrs ago but he had to be taken off them because he wasnt eating and was refussing his blood tests, he wouldnt take them now anyway, he thinks he doesnt need meds im not so sure

 

[newmommy23]

is he diagnosed? that sounds like a poorly behaved child to me. =/
sounds like he needs better discipline...not to be rude at all of course

 

[boyzmum]

Hi,
My son has recently been diagnosed with adhd & we are still waiting on the aspergers assessment, he has just turned 13. He is medicated but its only whilst at school but i can sympathise with you. He is as big as me now & although can be aggressive its never towards me but that maybe because i can see the signs so stop it before it escalates. With him we have found that a strict routine & being pretty heavy on the discipline (ie never backing down with say taking away the xbox or computer time) works best & if he is feeling angry finding out the cause & a way to solve it helps.
Is your son under a mht or anything? as it may be worth contacting them to see if they can offer any help as there are also lots of different medications they can take now which he may be happier with, also it can take a while to get the correct dosage, the one ds1 takes so far hasnt affected his eating to badly as it only last 8 hours but according to the school it hasnt changed his behaviour (concentration,backchat,ignorance,disruptiveness) what so ever so they may well increase his dosage.

sarah

 

[princesspie]

is he diagnosed? that sounds like a poorly behaved child to me. =/
sounds like he needs better discipline...not to be rude at all of course

yes he was diagnosed at 6 years old, im sorry but i did find your comment very rude. Do you have any knowledge of ADHD? we dicipline him but it isnt enough, he doesnt care if we take his tv, x box, bike away from him, he is impulsive and its part of his condition, i have 3 other children and 2 step children that are very well behaved so i know its not down to the way i dicipline, he has an illness.

 

[princesspie]

Hi,
My son has recently been diagnosed with adhd & we are still waiting on the aspergers assessment, he has just turned 13. He is medicated but its only whilst at school but i can sympathise with you. He is as big as me now & although can be aggressive its never towards me but that maybe because i can see the signs so stop it before it escalates. With him we have found that a strict routine & being pretty heavy on the discipline (ie never backing down with say taking away the xbox or computer time) works best & if he is feeling angry finding out the cause & a way to solve it helps.
Is your son under a mht or anything? as it may be worth contacting them to see if they can offer any help as there are also lots of different medications they can take now which he may be happier with, also it can take a while to get the correct dosage, the one ds1 takes so far hasnt affected his eating to badly as it only last 8 hours but according to the school it hasnt changed his behaviour (concentration,backchat,ignorance,disruptiveness) what so ever so they may well increase his dosage.

sarah

thanks for the reply hun, my internet has been down, been tying to message you back for a few days
i think he needs meds but he doesnt think he does, he had reqular appointments (if i can get him there!) so i will try and talk about the possibility of getting him on something. i worry so much about his future, he has no idea about the real world and does some very silly things wthout thinking. he has no sense of time!!! he is late for everything, looses everything, he is contantly pulling my house apart because he has lost something! i dont know how he is going to hold a job down, form relationships ect. i try to help him but i think he just feels im on at him all the time, well i am in a way because if i dont he wont get anything done, he needs telling 10 times before he does something, constantly needs reminding of the rules, what time he needs to be home, he is never in on time, and that leads to me grounding him, him getting angry, me getting angry, and then he storms off out anyway because " he hasnt done anything wrong, and his life is rubbish and no one cares!" ALL I WANTED WAS HIM TO BE HOME ON TIME!! lol, its like its my fault!!
im tired!! i dont see a solution, i dont see things getting better. i know he will always have this and its part of him and i cant change him, i love him to bits but i dont think i like him very much at the moment and its getting me very down , im 7 weeks pregnant so maybe its my hormones playing a big part in it but i just feel like a rubbish mum, like i did something wrong to make him this way, my other children keep me going but i cant help but worry about the future, everytime i read up on ADHD it normally allways leads to alchohol probs, drugs, prison!!! i try my best i really do, but what if my best isnt good enough? ive organised activities, fishing trips, youth clubs, ect. he just throws it back in my face there is no support here, my family are fed up with listening to me, he has a support worker at school but i dont know what her job discription is because she has never done anything for us. i cant talk to my husband about it any more because it gets him down and then i worry he just wont come home from work one day

 

[whitelilly]

the two treatments that are recommnded are parenting groups and/ or mds so iit sounds like your son needs referred to a child psychiatrist again...

 

[leanne4stars]

my son wasn't diagnosed until he was 11, i knew way before then he was adhd but i guess i didnt want to admit it for some strange reason i suppose evryone wants perfect kids

he started on meds, concerta xl, lowest dose and quickly in 2 yrs has increased to maximum as he has grown so tall. i have to say having him on meds was the best thing i ever done as it helped alot with the impulsiveness i just feel guilty that i left him for so long

he, like your son doesnt eat when on meds but as he only takes them in the morning by 8-9pm they have wore off and i have found cooking him a big hearty meal and letting him eat as much as he wants before bed is working for us. he isn;t really gaining weight but he is not losing

my 6 yr old also has just been diagnosed with adhd and is currently in reviews for medication as i think he needs it now

have you contacted adhd solutions?? not sure if its just my area but i think its nationwide? they have been brilliant in supporting me, attending school exclusion meetings etc etc they also help run a parent self help support group once a month whic is amazing just to talk to other mums. they also do parenting courses which are very good in understanding our children on their level

i know sometimes it can be VERY hard but like you said it is an illness, they didnt choose to be like this and although we can't make them better we can but try and do our best to supprt them.

hope you're ok, i know about tough times xx