Argh I've left him in the cot crying!

Discussion in 'Baby Club' started by Mummy2Asher, Jun 2, 2011.

  1. Mummy2Asher

    Mummy2Asher mummy to 2 boys!

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    LO has not slept well for months, he doesn't nap in the day and wakes whenever, but the longest he goes is an hour, normally about 15wakings a night! Plus ds1 was sick twice last night. Plus were going to Cornwall for a week tomorrow and I've been dOing all the cleaning and packing and I'm just exhausted!!!
    I'm in tears because I don't know how much longer I can carry on like this. In 6months hes only slept one 4.5hr period and he longest he will go is one hour normally....I feel like he worst mother in the world.
    He's been crying 5mins now, I'm crying, ds1 has woken up, oh isn't home till 10pm :'( I tried to feed him to sleep but he just kept hitting me in the face and I just can't deal with it tonight.
     
  2. Kians_Mummy

    Kians_Mummy Mummy to Kian & an angel

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    Aww hun :hugs:
    Your not the worst mother in the world :hugs: .
    When DS gets like that I leave him in his cot to cry himself to sleep because sometimes that is all you can do.
    Can you not go to the doctors and ask about his sleeping? x
     
  3. 1982emmac

    1982emmac mummy to two under two

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    sending u big hugs, you are not the worst mother in the world at all. i really, really feel for u, 15 wakings a night would drive any one insane. when he is waking is he needing to be fed or just to be comforted? i really dont know what to say other than hugs xx
     
  4. DaisyvonStarr

    DaisyvonStarr Well-Known Member

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    Hope you're ok. JUst take five, sit down if you can. Don't let it get to you. LEt your partner help you out when he gets in :)
     
  5. punk_pig

    punk_pig Guest

    I don't think leaving him to cry while you regain your sanity is going to do him any harm Hun.:hugs:

    Is there a medical reason he can't sleep longer ie wind, reflux, constipation? Or is he just reliant on you to settle him?

    I'm not a leave em to cry for hours person but I think you need some kind of sleep training as every hour is going to destroy you. For now could you have him in bed with you so you could both get a bit of Kip?

    My LO hates to nap in the day I have to force her in to it and 9 times out of 10 she resists so I know how draining that is, but she does sleep better at night when she has had some naps so I persist.

    I think 6months is a good time to say enough is enough and get some advice from your GP and HV.
     
  6. Mummy2Asher

    Mummy2Asher mummy to 2 boys!

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    Just comforted, he feeds about twice a night now but just wakes constantly.
    We've tried all the sleep training, even had a sleep trainer! It made him so much worse and he just clung to me every minute of the day for about 4weeks!
    Normally I can cope and I can get by but with ds1 being sick last night as well I just want him to sleep for just an hour! I just need 5mins to myself :'(
     
  7. Rose_bud

    Rose_bud Well-Known Member

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    :hugs:It's important you step away and calm down, he'll be fine crying for 10 mins. Just take deep breaths and try to relax. Sometimes the more we stress the more they stress! You might find if you go back calm he'll calm down quicker too.
     
  8. Mummy2Asher

    Mummy2Asher mummy to 2 boys!

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    Well he fell asleep after my last post. Thi has never happened before and I feel terrible.
    He has no medical Problems and all the advice I got from hv and docs was to shut the door at 7pm and open it at 7am....not helpful!
    He's a huge weight, eats amazing during the day, and used to sleep through till he hit 18weeks then it just stopped.
    Atleast he's asleep for a minute and I can have time to think
     
  9. sciencemum

    sciencemum Proud mummy

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    Sorry to hear, but I am going through the same thing.
    And the getting hit and nipped in the face also. Pain in the BUM!!!!!! (or face)!
     
  10. sez

    sez Well-Known Member

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    No advice but just wanted to give :hugs:
     
  11. rjm09

    rjm09 kcm12

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    Maybe not leave him for 12 hours! but i'd put him in his room, and let him cry himself to sleep. If my guy gets to me, that's what I do. even if it takes him 45 minutes of straight crying, i go off and do dishes, cut grass, whatever, just to take a break from it. Of course knowing there isn't something wrong with him.

    Sounds like something changed after 18 weeks, and it's just been allowed, i'm not trying to put blame on you. I couldn't see myself still getting up every hour or 2 with a 6 month old!

    By 9 weeks, mine was sleeping about 10-12 hours a day, and still does. We keep a consistent routine every day.

    I wish you the best!
     
  12. Kians_Mummy

    Kians_Mummy Mummy to Kian & an angel

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    You said he wakes for comforts? Have you tried putting a t-shirt with yours or OH scent on it?
    My DS went through a stage of being clingy and I tried it, it did work x
     
  13. angel2010

    angel2010 Cart & Emma's mom, 1mc

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    :hugs: Don't feel bad for having to step away. You are doing the best you can. You are a wonderful mom and have been able to handle much more than I probably would have.
     
  14. emmadaisy

    emmadaisy Mum to Charlie and Lewis

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    sorry to hijack your thread but going through same problems with my lo, he slept fine untill I went to see my dad in cyprus in feb when he was 6 months, now he wakes 2 or 3 times a night, all I do is turn him over, give him his dummy and tuck him in, I dont even speak to him but it gets fraining, we had a bad night last night and he was up fro 1.30 till 5am!!! only thing that got him to sleep was oh laying on futon with him till he fell to sleep!

    but does putting a tshirt in work? I may try it and put one of my tshirts in tonight and see what happens.
     
  15. Mummy2Asher

    Mummy2Asher mummy to 2 boys!

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    I've tried that... We co sleep and before he would feed constantly which I've stopped but he still wakes, sits up, crawls for a cuddle and goes back to sleep. So he's not waking to be awake or for anything if that makes sense.
    I won't let him cry again, I just can't do it even though he did fall asleep this time. On holiday for a week so will get more sleep with Oh here to help.
     
  16. Kians_Mummy

    Kians_Mummy Mummy to Kian & an angel

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    It worked with my DS, he just turned 5 months when I tried it. He started to cuddle into it. Hopefully it will work for you :) x
     
  17. Tiredgirl

    Tiredgirl Mum of 2 under 2

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    Don't have any advice hun but sending you :hugs: xxx
     
  18. Dizzymum

    Dizzymum Well-Known Member

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    Hope things improve. Have a lovely holiday x
     
  19. emmamc28

    emmamc28 mum to charlotte and ben

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    i know exactly how u are feelin my ds1 was the same and was about 9 months before he slept thru. we did the controlled crying method and within about 4 nights of doin it he slept thru. you just need to be firm with yourself and not give into him(easier said than don i now i'm not being funny i have bin there). like others have said you are not a bad mother for leaving him he is safe in his cot and a few tears wont hurt him. calm yourself then try settling him without picking him up i found ben would cry when i left the room the first few times but after a while he got himself to sleep. hope you get a bit of sleep tonite hun and big hugsxxx
     
  20. shimmy

    shimmy mummy , daddy and baby

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    Your not a bad mum.no advice but lots of hugs x
     

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