At the end of my tether :(

[Dopeyjopey]

I don't know what I can do about this and it is starting to get to me. A has never been a good sleeper - he often wakes every hour for a feed and drops back off. Not a problem once I go to bed (we cosleep) but in the evenings it is killing me. He wakes every 20 minutes and nothing but boobie sends him back off.

I've tried shhh/pat, singing, rocking, white noise and none of it works. I have just tried CC and PU/PD but nothing is working. I'm sitting next to his cot and he is rolling around and playing like it's the middle of the day. What can i do? I'm a single mum and i get no time to myself at all and i don't think i can cope anymore. I just need an hour of baby free time before i go to bed

 

[ouchwithNo.2]

oh gosh... poor you, that must be so tough....
I am sorry but I can't offer any real advice as I don't breastfeed but I know when my LO was being breastfed up until 5 weeks all she wanted was comfort sucking for hours and hours, mostly between 5pm and 10pm.
It nearly drove me cuckoo as I had no time to myself and had a 6yr to look after.
Do you not have a friend / family member who could free you for a few hours a week? Perhaps on a regular basis an give you some time to look forward to?
Would LO take a bottle of expressed milk?
xx

 

[louandivy]

Oh gosh that must be so hard for you . I'm sorry I don't have much advice, i think i read somewhere to try giving them sterilised water when they want to be fed constantly at night so eventually they just don't bother? I really hope things get better

 

[Dopeyjopey]

My mum comes to help out sometimes but as she works she has to leave at 9 and that's when the problems help most. He is definitely having a feed rather than a comfort suck. It's been 10 minutes since his last feed and he's at it again. I can actually hear the gulping. He won't take a bottle or a dummy either

I feel like i'm failing big time. I know it isn't his fault but it's starting to really upset me

 

[Dopeyjopey]

I mean that's when the problems start and i need help most. Brain is fried!

 

[ouchwithNo.2]

My mum comes to help out sometimes but as she works she has to leave at 9 and that's when the problems help most. He is definitely having a feed rather than a comfort suck. It's been 10 minutes since his last feed and he's at it again. I can actually hear the gulping. He won't take a bottle or a dummy either

I feel like i'm failing big time. I know it isn't his fault but it's starting to really upset me

hey, you def aren't failing him - I wish I had managed to stick at the breastfeeding longer than I did, I only stopped because I couldn't handle the constant feeds and needed the routine with formula...
hopefully a mum who does B.F will have some advice xx

 

[Justagirlxx]

I dont know what to say besides I'm sorry you are going through this. That must be so tough. I honestly don't know what I'd do without that 3 hours to myself after LO goes to bed at night. Everyone needs a break. Its no wonder you are having such a hard time.

 

[PresqueVu]

My LO is a similar age and evenings only boob will do!

Are you exclusively b/f? I am and I think some of the problem may be due to them being so close to a good time to introduce other foods. My midwife said that this time before weaning is difficult and that it does get easier once they can have other foods.

Sometimes a bath can distract my LO from wanting to comfort suck if you've not tried that? Its a bit more difficult now its cold and he wakes up quite a lot after getting out though.

and as ouchwithNo.2 says, there is NO way you are letting him down - exactly the opposite

 

[cherryglitter]

I have nothing to advise hun but I hope things get a bit easier for you.
It must be really difficult and hard.
Take care!x

 

[Dopeyjopey]

My LO is a similar age and evenings only boob will do!

Are you exclusively b/f? I am and I think some of the problem may be due to them being so close to a good time to introduce other foods. My midwife said that this time before weaning is difficult and that it does get easier once they can have other foods.

Sometimes a bath can distract my LO from wanting to comfort suck if you've not tried that? Its a bit more difficult now its cold and he wakes up quite a lot after getting out though.

and as ouchwithNo.2 says, there is NO way you are letting him down - exactly the opposite

He loves bathtime too much and it wakes him up!

I'm planning to start BLW in a few weeks so i'm hoping it'll help. He obviously is very hungry because he gulps it down. He is almost a quarter of my weight now so i can't help but think he must need more than i can give him. I can't stop losing weight and am probably quite underweight by now and i'm pretty sure night times are the reason!

 

[Twiglet]

If you need me to come help you in the day at any point hun lemme know and I'll make my way up no matter what so long as the kids aren't ill!

No advice though as you know Caitlyn is an awful sleeper and weaning didn't help her BUT it did get a lot better...rather than being up 5 - 6 times a night we cut right down to one

 

[Bee70]

hi we had similar issues at this age. we tweeked a few things. you need a good routine which you use for all sleeps - and a break between boobie and sleep - like reading a bed time story or a quiet hug. whenever you put him down, keep telling him firmly 'its bedtime' and if he gets upset reassuringly say 'we're just going to sleep'
the problem is also that at this age it is a time of transition when they are more mobile and hungry!! when you start weaning, things will gradually get better ( a week or two).
My little boy had big issues with sleep for a long time - especially during the day, but when he was ready to wean he woke up every hour only wanting boobie.
if you need any help then let me know - it does get better though! (now sleeps until 4.30 from 7 and does naps)
HTH

 

[cissyhope]

cant offer you any advice as im struggling but wanted to offer my support and say your amazing! bf and your a single mum! wow! well done,i was only saying to my oh that i can see why women give bf up and i dont know how single women do it! i find it so hard for different reasons. Hope you get it sorted x

 

[frsttimemommy]

have you tried feeding for longer periods of time? i learned that if i let him feed then sleep then he wakes up alot more often. but if i feed him and when he falls asleep wake him back up, he usually eats enough to sleep for 3hrs. i would try doing that maybe?

 

[bekkie]

big

My boy is a horrible sleeper so I don't have any advice... this won't be at all reassuring but weaning didn't help us at all. He has finally started only waking 2-3x a night instead of the 6-7x he was doing a couple months ago though, so that's something (although there is still at least one night a week where I get him down at midnight finally and he wakes at 3 ready to play and won't go back down until 6)

I just wanted to say that I hope you're able to get some time to yourself.. I know how precious and necessary that alone time is. And I'm sorry if this is overstepping but make sure you try to eat! healthy mommy = healthy baby.

 

[suzanne108]

I have felt like this many a time, I still have problems with her waking a million times in the night so I can't help but I wanted to send hugs because I know how hard it is being a single mummy.



I actually find it a little easier now I'm in work for 3 days and because I work in an office I can sit down & have a cuppa!

xxx

 

[Dopeyjopey]

Thank you for the support and hugs everyone!

It always looks a bit better in the morning, however much of a zombie i feel.

I'm going to try and implement some sort of routine today and put him in his room for a nap whether he wants one or not and impose a bedtime and stick to it. It'll be hard work but hopefully he'll get the hang of it

If he doesn't, i suppose it won't last forever and i'll just have to man up a bit and not let it bother me!

 

[RainbowDrop_x]

I don't have any advice hun but I hope things get a bit easier for you soon