Baby blues. Help me. Crying every day. Week 2

[Ripley]

My baby is super cute and lovable. I love him and feel super protective over him.

But I miss my life, my carefree life with my husband. Going for dinners. Laughing. hanging out. Glass if wine or 2. After a Csection I'm trapped in this house. I'm overwhelmed. I feel sad and like I have no smile. My husband is doing his best to talk me thru thus stage. I have an appt with Dr in one week and if I still feel this I will talk to her.

Experienced Moms.. Does this go away? When?! Is everyone else in baby bliss? Having a baby was my idea. I've been so excited. We both have been. Now it's just this. The house, the baby, and his needs. What's left?

 

[little_lady]

I don't think any mum has a blissful time of it 24/7. Its a huge adjustment and a massive life change - but yes, things do get easier. Normally around the 6 to 8 week mark, you'll start to feel human again and your baby will hopefully have sorted out some longer sleep times and start smiling and cooing at you.

Are you breastfeeding? Again, this should settle down by 6 weeks and get into a manageable routine. Then you can go out in between feeds and get some 'me time' if your husband or mum will babysit.

You've had a c section as well, this is major rsurgery so after 2 weeks you're hardly going to be on top of the world. Take some time to just relax with your baby if you can, take it easy and get whoever you can in to help. Baby blues are soooo common but if you feel it getting worse instead of better definitely speak to your GP.

Big hugs, motherhood isn't easy but its so worth it.

 

[lily24]

I remember feeling like this first time round and didn't know why?! But yeah, I hated myself for not enjoying my 'old' life as much as I could of. Being Carefree and having more lie-ins!
But really, we got there and everything fell into place.
We still go for dinner, we still go to the cinema (with the children!) we go lots of places and do lots of things with them that we wouldn't of done if we didn't have them. Swimming, play parks, soft play, the beach and more! It's fun.
At this early stage you are sleep deprived, sore (I've had 2 c-sections so know how hard it is) and still getting to know ur baby. Once LO hits the 3 month mark, I assure you everything will start to seem normal again. More routine and you will feel you know when your free time is.

 

[ShelbyLC]

Oh hun, I remember the first few weeks after giving birth being like this. It's awful but I promise it does go away. I think it lasted about 3 weeks for me, maybe a bit less. Your hormones are all over the place right now - understandably! - but things will soon level out and you'll feel better.

I know it's easier said than done, but maybe try to break the monotony and order take-out or something. Try to get dressed in the morning if you can. I know it's hard (especially after a c-section) but I always feel more productive if I get dressed first thing, even if I do nothing else.

 

[Sparrow85]

God, this has brought back memories!

I have never been as excited as I was during pregnancy; I thought having a baby would be these best thing in the world... Ha!

Cue not sleeping for days on end, constantly feeding and holding a newborn, never getting a minute to myself, trying to figure out why he was crying, taking over an hour to even get out the house to go anywhere... nobody tells you how bloody hard it is (or they do, but you choose to ignore it!)

I loved my baby when he was a newborn, but I pretty much cried everyday for about 3 weeks I think. I mourned my old life and had to accept my new life. Nothing changes your life more than a baby.

I promise though that it gets better. Do you have family around you? My mum helped me a lot, she came up to my house and looked after LO so I could have a sleep, she cooked for me and just kept me company when my OH went back to work.

I would say the first 6 week are the hardest and then you start to build a routine.

At 6 months in, I honestly wouldn't change this life for anything; it's the best! No, we don't go out as much as we used to, but when we do, all we do is talk about LO anyway!

You are definitely right to talk to your doctor though if you're feeling down, but it most likely will go away on its own.

Usually after major surgery, you go home and recuperate.. no chance with a baby! Good luck and remember, you are not alone

 

[Indi84]

i can't comment on baby blues side, i was lucky and never got it, but i can say with time everything changes.

I've been to the cinema, for dinner with friends, lunch with dh while granny baby sits. things aren't the same, i don't drink anymore or stay up late, but i feel much more like me, as well as a mum it'll happen, it's so early for you. hope you feel better soon.

 

[beanie1978]

Big hugs
Its normal to feel like this. Your life as been turned upside down and no matter how much you expect your life to change, NOTHING pepares you for the shock it is. 99% of ftm feel like this but if it continues past 3 weeks ( the crying) speak to your dr or hv. Soon you will look back and wonder what the hell you did with your time before Lo arrived.

 

[Ripley]

Thanks everyone. Your words help

 

[Katrina18]

My baby is super cute and lovable. I love him and feel super protective over him.

But I miss my life, my carefree life with my husband. Going for dinners. Laughing. hanging out. Glass if wine or 2. After a Csection I'm trapped in this house. I'm overwhelmed. I feel sad and like I have no smile. My husband is doing his best to talk me thru thus stage. I have an appt with Dr in one week and if I still feel this I will talk to her.

Experienced Moms.. Does this go away? When?! Is everyone else in baby bliss? Having a baby was my idea. I've been so excited. We both have been. Now it's just this. The house, the baby, and his needs. What's left?

I know exactly how you feel! My baby is just over 5 weeks and I too had a c section..I was miserable the first three weeks or so. I love my baby to death and wouldn't change anything at all but I was just so sad about this big change that no one can ever prepare you for. I promise though it gets better! We've started to adjust more and get in our groove which is definitely helping (by our i mean me and baby). Don't get me wrong, I still have my days but they are now less frequent. You're definitely not alone!

 

[Ripley]

Thanks again. Heading into the night. Hoping for sleep.

 

[SaraEmily]

I felt just like you did for the first 4 weeks or so. I would look at OH and start crying out of nowhere because I felt like I missed him, even though he was right there. It just felt different having a baby, like it wasn't just the two of us anymore. It sounds weird but it's how I felt. I honestly felt like I made a mistake in choosing to have a baby. I felt trapped in the house while OH was at work with other adults. It was so lonely.

But it gets better quickly, assuming it's just baby blues. By the time she was a few weeks old I was starting to feel normal again, physically and emotionally. Just make sure you sleep whenever possible, eat regularly, and try to get some fresh air. Don't stay cooped up in the house. Those early days are tough, but soon enough you'll get into a routine and things will get better.

Oh, and DON'T feel guilty for feeling this way. It's completely normal. I just wish more people talked about it so I would've known to expect it.

 

[iwantabub]

Hey Huni I had my section 2 weeks ago today and I'm telling ya the more u do the better u feel... Both physically and mentally... We have been out for dinner and lunch and for walks and honestly other than going to work and not drinking I haven't done anything different really...
I don't know how your recovery is going but the more I moved around and got back to normal (other then the lifting) I felt so much better... Get up in the morning. Put some make up on or whatever u used to do and u will feel 100times better for it.

Also I don't have "the baby blues" as such as I am coping really well but I do feel the need to cry all the time lol ... At stupid shit like thinking about bubs growing up etc...

It will pass I think... Hormones are still so messed up

 

[MrsButterfly]

Best piece of advice I was given was the first six weeks with a baby are all about survival! It's tough, was so much tougher than I expected. I missed my old life and felt like I'd made a huge mistake.

But it passes and all of a sudden it will be a distant memory. You find a routine and it will work. Just take any help offered at this stage and don't feel guilty. Get out and about as much as possible. And if you're in the house all day still get dressed and do your hair as it does make the world of difference.

Big hugs Its a difficult thing to admit in the real world so you end up feeling like the only one but I promise you you're not. It's totally normal xxx

 

[Louise88]

This was me all over I couldn't leave the house due to one cut and one tear down below so I couldn't walk far without my bits hurting (I couldn't sitdown either like lol) I cried every single day and even started having anxiety attacks my midwife got worried about me and I ended up on anti depressants but if I'm honest once I'd healed and was able to leave the house it was a much more happier experience I'd go for walks every day which helped a lot and I made a point of meeting up with other mums every Thursday for a coffee which was nice . Have you got a garden? I know a couple of my friends in the first month just got friends or family around to there's, they'd sit in the garden with their baby in the pram, bouncy chair or swing, and just have a natter in the sun with a nice drink and snacks

I promise you it will pass but if you do feel worried about how your feeling then please speak to someone

 

[Lady H]

My daughter is 4 weeks 5 days and I've cried every day so far, some days pretty much for hours on end. Today I feel better, it's a massive change to our life. Sleep deprivation makes everything seem much worse and the hormones are mental. You are right to keep any eye on it and its great you DH is also looking out for you.

What's left is celebrating your babies achievements. When mine started to follow me with her eyes I felt so so happy. These are my new triumphs and when we settle down more I plan to take baby out with us and find ways to still enjoy some of the things we loved before she arrived. I really know you will feel better soon, just hang in there xxx

 

[Ripley]

SaraEmily it's pretty much exactly like yu wrote.

DH goes back next week and I dread it. I started feeling a bit better yesterday but just found out a family member passed. And now DH may have to leave for a day for the funeral. He's my lifeline now. My family is 5000 miles away. My Mom to ill to travel. My sister is caring for her.

I know it's all in my head. If it is post Partum I want the drugs to feel happy again.

This sucks.

 

[Ripley]

In desperation I called my Dr today. I went in and she said I have post Partum depression. I've been given zoloft. It takes a couple weeks to work. Also She asked DH to stay home another week.

 

[Lady H]

Sorry to hear that. I hope it helps you quickly and having DH around will really help xxx