Baby Fever D:

[Bubbles1088]

Hello all! I'm new to the forum, been doing a bit of lurking on the threads today and just wanted to get some things off my chest and see if anyone has any advice for me!

I'm 26, DH is 27. We have a really great relationship with each other. One of the only frustrating things going on right now, though, is that I cannot wait to get pregnant and start a family; I feel like raising kids is what I was born to do, and he just simply isn't ready, though he does want kids. He wants us to be in a better financial situation and also to have some time to ourselves, which is totally understandable, but I just can't kick this baby fever! When I said I didn't want to wait a year, though, he was thankfully on board (this was last month that we talked about it).

We aren't trying, but we aren't "not trying", though he is quite in tune with my cycle and pulls out during my fertile times. I still hope that every cycle though that I will be pregnant. I look for symptoms, which is frustrating for me, because pretty much all my PMS symptoms mimic preggo symptoms (sore and enlarged bbs, cramps, super hungry, cravings, even darker areolas sometimes), so I try to tell myself not to look so hard for them, but it's hopeless; I still try to find new things happening with my body to convince myself that it's finally happening. I've POAS so many times. I feel so obsessed and crazy some months (last month was the worst thus far). Right now I'm late and just took a test that didn't even show the control line (a dud test) which I'm taking as a sign to calm down.

Anyone else frustrated and baby crazy? I just want a little one so bad! How do I cope?

 

[Buffyx]

I wish I had the answer for you! DH and myself are both 27, and if he was having it his way, we would be about two years off TTC.

My cousin and his wife announced they were pregnant and I couldn't stand it. When I told my husband, I burst in to tears. I think that showed him how much it really actually meant to me and we agreed to TTC.

 

[Bubbles1088]

Buffyx, I know how you feel!! I feel like everyone around me is having babies. I get on Facebook and there are pics all over my timeline of little cuties and it makes me feel like I'm behind and that I should already have my own little bundle of joy!

AF still hasn't shown this morning but I refuse to test anymore. I just don't think it happened this month (plus buying tons of pg tests gets expensive). Not like we were trying anyway, but I still hope every month that it has happened. DH wouldn't be upset if I fell pregnant, but he doesn't want to actually "officially" try yet.

Good luck to you on TTC! I hope it doesn't take you guys very long!

 

[Bubbles1088]

Not timeline, news feed*

 

[SpringCrane]

Oh, goodness, I know exactly how you feel. I wanted to start trying as soon as we got married, but my husband wanted us to have a house first. It seemed like such a silly thing to wait for--the home we were renting was plenty big and moving is moving whether it involves a crib or not! I thought about it constantly, and I would have been MORE than happy to fall pregnant accidentally. Thankfully, finding a house happened pretty quickly, and we got keys on our 1st anniversary. At that point, I knew if I got pregnant right away, I'd be due during the final months of my masters program, so we waited to start trying when it would mean I would be due after I finished. Thankfully it only took us three months to be successful, but I was freaking obsessed during that time. One of the cycles I even ended up 2 weeks late, with no BFP. I was a nutcase.

And now, since my son turned 1, I'm pretty much back to being obsessed with being pregnant again. However, I know what newbornhood is like, so I'm a little more comfortable waiting a bit longer

Long story short, I really can empathize. I would just consider (1) there's never a "perfect" time to start trying, (2) sometimes I do wish we had had more time just as a married couple before having our son, and (3) time flies and you'll be TTC, pregnant, and parents before you know it.

Maybe take the time before you're ready to start trying to read some books, take vitamins, figure you and your husband's wish list of things to do before baby, and enjoy each other! Good luck (and really, just know that all of us on this forum totally get how you feel!)

 

[Bubbles1088]

Oh, goodness, I know exactly how you feel. I wanted to start trying as soon as we got married, but my husband wanted us to have a house first. It seemed like such a silly thing to wait for--the home we were renting was plenty big and moving is moving whether it involves a crib or not! I thought about it constantly, and I would have been MORE than happy to fall pregnant accidentally. Thankfully, finding a house happened pretty quickly, and we got keys on our 1st anniversary. At that point, I knew if I got pregnant right away, I'd be due during the final months of my masters program, so we waited to start trying when it would mean I would be due after I finished. Thankfully it only took us three months to be successful, but I was freaking obsessed during that time. One of the cycles I even ended up 2 weeks late, with no BFP. I was a nutcase.

And now, since my son turned 1, I'm pretty much back to being obsessed with being pregnant again. However, I know what newbornhood is like, so I'm a little more comfortable waiting a bit longer

Long story short, I really can empathize. I would just consider (1) there's never a "perfect" time to start trying, (2) sometimes I do wish we had had more time just as a married couple before having our son, and (3) time flies and you'll be TTC, pregnant, and parents before you know it.

Maybe take the time before you're ready to start trying to read some books, take vitamins, figure you and your husband's wish list of things to do before baby, and enjoy each other! Good luck (and really, just know that all of us on this forum totally get how you feel!)

Glad to know I'm not alone! Thank you for the reply and the advice! I actually do have a Dr. appt with my gyno on Oct. 14 to discuss preparation for TTC. DH was on board with this appt as well.

We both have talked about there being no perfect time to start trying. He knows and understands, but is still waiting for the timing in his mind to be right.

It's funny too about wanting to spend time as a married couple for awhile first, because this is one thing I talked about with him before marriage; I told him that I wanted that as well. But we had a scare a few months before marriage (I was a whole week and a half late! Work was really stressful then though) and took two tests, of course both BFN, and I was noticing that I was slightly disappointed by that.

He is the first person I've ever really been happy about having children with (I've had more scares with others, and they were stressful because I didn't want to fall pregnant with their children). I do know that he wants to get his debts more under control before kids. He recently picked up a second job for this and so we could live more comfortably, so we are taking steps. I'm just so impatient!

 

[loulabell]

I know exactly how you feel hunny, try to fill your time up over the next year with events you can look forward to like seeing friends and family, going on small trips peoples birthdays etc and before you know it time will fly by. I know it sucks but keep smiling, Im here as are the other ladies if you ever want a chat and just know we know what your going through your not alone

 

[Bubbles1088]

Thanks, loulabell! I am so glad I'm not alone in this feeling; honestly, I was starting to feel a little nuts, especially last month! But now, at least when I feel nuts, I'll have other ladies to talk to who feel the same way!

 

[MamaByrd]

I think all of us here in WTT feel the same you do! The best thing to do is just enjoy you and hubby's alone time & know that your time will come! (Sooner than a lot of ours!!)

 

[Bubbles1088]

Thanks, MamaByrd! Hoping you all are right and time will fly! I guess I just have to look at it as time spent enjoying one another before a little one comes along and that goes away for 18 years!

 

[vitaminkitten]

Omg, are we the same person? Every month after I ovulate I literally have to put it on repeat in my head "I'm not pregnant. There is no way I can be pregnant. Your boobs have been sore every cycle since your first period. You're only dizzy because you haven't eaten since 6 hours ago. Your boobs are not bigger." Etc., etc. It's pretty awful. I feel like I'm so in tune with my body that I have to remind myself that when it happens, I'll probably know the second it occurs. That's actually why I joined this forum. Need some help with chart interpretation and need someone to tell me I'm imagining things as usual. Hang in there! When it happens for us, it'll be the most exciting thing ever. No need to rush such an important moment.

 

[Bubbles1088]

Omg, are we the same person? Every month after I ovulate I literally have to put it on repeat in my head "I'm not pregnant. There is no way I can be pregnant. Your boobs have been sore every cycle since your first period. You're only dizzy because you haven't eaten since 6 hours ago. Your boobs are not bigger." Etc., etc. It's pretty awful. I feel like I'm so in tune with my body that I have to remind myself that when it happens, I'll probably know the second it occurs. That's actually why I joined this forum. Need some help with chart interpretation and need someone to tell me I'm imagining things as usual. Hang in there! When it happens for us, it'll be the most exciting thing ever. No need to rush such an important moment.

:O I think we are the same person!! Haha. You sound JUST like me! I'm super in tune with my body as well, and I tell myself the same thing, that when it happens, I will probably know. Sore boobs do not mean pregnancy! But I still look into it anyway because I am obsessed. -_-;

Ugh, AF symptoms suck, especially when you want a LO so bad, and even more so that we have like all the classic pg symptoms as AF symptoms. It's frustrating, but you're right, we need to not rush and we will be overjoyed when it does finally happen!

 

[SpringCrane]

When we were WTT and TTC my son, I was totally obsessed with what my body was doing and how I was feeling. Yet the cycle I fell pregnant, I was actually only testing to confirm that I wasn't pregnant. I was so sure I wasn't that I tested without my husband home even though I promised I wouldn't.... I immediately got two very dark lines.

It will be so wonderfully exciting when you get your first BFP, but just remember that symptoms don't mean much of anything, especially if your usual AF symptoms are the usual pregnancy symptoms too!

 

[Earthylove]

oh my goodness, i totally get what you're saying. My husband and I are 26 and 25 and we're wtt until we're in a better position financially and i'm closer to the end of my masters program. We're thinking August 2015, but I was ready to start as soon as we got married almost a year ago. it seems like every cycle, even though i know it's hiiighly unlikely that i'm pregnant, i'm still thinking "what if!?" and i get my hopes up only to be disappointed when AF shows up. the other day a classmate revealed that she was pregnant. I was happy for her, but at the same time, i just wanted to cry!!

What i do to stay sane in those times is redirect myself to some pre pregnancy goals that i've come up with. One of those goals is to be physically fit and healthy before ttc, so in that case, I will look up things like prenatal diets/best things to eat when ttc, and read inspirational blogs about health conscious mamas, work out and fine tune my exercise regimen, add new health things to my diet, and basically obsess over that in the mean time. lol

ahh, it sucks to be impatient :/

 

[Bubbles1088]

Earthylove, whenever I find out a friend is pregnant or had their baby, I get all sad and, dare I say, a little jealous. :/ Not a good feeling! I do need to work on my goals as well, though I guess I am having a hard time focusing on any goal other than "be a mommy". I am working on my health though! Giave up alcohol, trying to eat more fruits and veggies, and should probably start vitamins and more regular exercise.

 

[KalonKiki]

We definitely all feel the same way that you do, especially when WTT for #1. I promise you though that if you did have a "happy accident" right now before you completed your WTT goals you would probably regret that some of those things didn't get done before you had a baby. That's what happened to me. DS was unplanned while we were waiting to try and I was soooo unbelievable broody and impatient that I hoped I would get pregnant every month. When I did though I was really excited about it until the severe morning sickness hit at 7+4 weeks and then I couldn't wait for my second trimester to get here so that I could finally eat something without rushing to the toilet. Then my second trimester came and I was still sick until 21 weeks and after the excitement of finding out that I was having a boy I was so over being pregnant and just wanted him to be born already. If we had been more careful and been able to wait for the time that we had planned we would be trying 4 months ago at the very latest. I don't regret having my DS, he's so wonderful and I feel so lucky to have him, but often times I wish that we could have completed our WTT goals first. That's why this time we're being very careful and making absolute certain. That we reach our goals before we TTC #2. We've already completed 4 out of 10 goals and if we can get at least half of the other goals done and it looks like we can complete the others before #2 arrives and feel like DS isn't still too young then I can probably convince my DF to start trying 8 months from now at the earliest.

I know waiting is hard right now, but you'll be glad that you did when you're pregnant and can afford to buy everything you could want or need for your LO without having to worry about finances. The time will fly, I promise. I've been WTT for #2 since DS was 4 months old and I can't believe that 8 months have already passed since then. Babies grow up waaay too fast as well, I can't believe that my son is already a toddler. Enjoy your time with DH and look forward to each goal that you complete.