Bad Night need a rant and advice please

[Mea]

Well the twins are 5 weeks tomorrow and we have just had our first bad night, spent most of the night in tears and now just want to curl up in a corner and cry!!!!
It was probably not as bad as it could get but i am now so tired the 5 broken hours of sleep a night i think are now getting to me.
They both had a feed at 10.30 and slepy until 1am then Sam woke up and all i could get into him was 1oz of milk he then fell asleep and what ever i tried i couldnt get him to stay awake, then emily woke and she did take 3oz so not too bad.
But then an hour later Sam woke again and took another 1.5oz which woke emily up and she decided it was time to do a massive runny poo which i chnaged and then 10 mins later she did another one at this point Sam was crying for his milk and so was i with DH laid next to me snoring his F***ing head off.(sorry angry and tired and upset this morning)
Sam took yet just another 2oz i then put them both back down only for them to wake again at 4am and do exactlly the same thing again!!!!!
At this point all i could think is i cant cope and i felt so mean for telling Sam and Emily to be quiet and that they were really starting to pee me off now.
Then they woke again at 6.15am so i got up and this woke DS up so we all got up and i found myself telling DS off for the silliest little thing!!!!
Sam has again taken 1 oz and fallen asleep, Emily has take 2oz before nodding off.

I feel so guilty this morning for shouting at the twins and DS and really dont want DS to see me like this can hardly see through the tears at the min.
Sorry but i just needed to get all this off my chest to people who would understand how i feel.
(I should explain that DH doesnt wake up when the babies do as he has to take medication to help him sleep, due to suffering with depression for years and recently being diagnosed with mild bi-polar) but this doesnt help when he lays there snoring when i am so so tired.

 

[fuzzylu]

you sound like me a few months ago, I spent several night in tears honestly thought i was cracking up. My boys decided they were going to feed every 2 hours and not together. this ment i spent several nights waking up ever 1/2hr to see to a baby.

Best thing we did was give the boys a dummy, and spread the day feeds out to 3 hourly. this wasnt easy and involved lots of cuddles but it ment they got more used to having more milk less often. this then encouraged them to go longer at night. also try and feed them both at the same time even if you have to wake one up this just means you will get longer between them feeding for you to sleep.

It does get better, although i know it doesnt feel like it at the moment.
It took a lot of hard work for us to get the boys to go longer between feeds but it did pay off. by 8 weeks they were just waking twice in the night and by 3 months were sleeping through most nights. they now feed every 4 hours in the day 8oz and then sleep 7-7 every night.

I did bottle feed though, breast fed babies tend to need feeding more oftern as breast milk is much quicker to digest.

xx

 

[chetnaz]

This sounds like me now! lol. Hun my two are nearly nine months old and I still have nights where I hardly sleep. Monday night was terrible for instance. They went down at 8pm. Kerem woke every half hour crying because thanks to my mum (we're living with my parents at the mo and my mum helps me with them which I'm grateful for, but she's got them used to being cuddled to sleep) he wants to be in my arms sleeping! He eventually went into a deep sleep at 11.30pm which is when I went to bed. By 2.30 am he woke up wanting a feed (i still BF them), which I refused to give him bcause at 9 months, he doesnt need a feed at night, he's just doing it fr comfort. Becuase I wouldnt feed him, he then proceeded to scream his head off for 2.5 hours!! I was at my wits end and wanted to strangle someone (DH was the nearest! lol). By the time I settled Kerem down at 5 pm, Kaan woke up crying and it took me another hour to get him to sleep, which meant I only got half an hour to sleep as I need to be up at 6.30 to get my eldest ready for school. I too was in tears. Last night was a little better thank god, and I keep telling myself it will get better. I bloody hope so, otherwise I'll end up having a mini breakdown at this rate. Hope you feel better and look on the bright side, you said this was your first bad night - my first bad nights started the moment they were born!

 

[Mea]

Thank you for your replies I know that every mum probably goes through this but it's just comforting to actually hear others say they are having the sane problems. Josh my ds was so easy and was sleeping through the night really early so this is all just a bit of a shock.

They are both still feeding (bottles) today every 2 hours and only taking a couple of ounces. I tried making them last to 3 hours but Sam got so upset I couldn't do it. I think I need to try and a be a bit tougher!!

 

[auntcarrie]

Were they preemies? My girls were 4+1/2 weeks early and fed every 3 hours. We woke them if they were sleeping. Or I'd feed both at the same time if they were very fussy (used car seats or bouncy chairs for co-feeding) and hungry.

The first 6 weeks were a blur, really the first 3 months, all because of interrupted and poor sleep. I will tell you, though, that it is amazing what your body can get used to. I was tired all the time, but somehow after the first 5 or 6 weeks, you just accept it and for some reason the motions seemed a bit easier. I was also practically main-lining caffeine at that point. God bless coffee. And I remember having many, many crying fits and breakdowns the first 6 - 8 weeks. I remember getting a bit angry at the babies too, but always managed to calm the anger down quickly when I reminded myself that they were just itty bitty babies and they couldn't help it.

Give yourself permission to be emotional/upset especially after a bad night!!! But slowly, it will improve. Once our girls were STTN (10 months, unfortunately not sooner), it was heaven. Of course by then I was already 2 months pregnant again... but that's another story! GOOD LUCK and hang in there.

 

[Lucy28]

I am so very sorry! I wish I had advice, but I haven't had mine yet. I am thinking about you, though. I can only imagine how stressful this must be. From other posts, it looks like there is light at the end of the tunnel, and I do agree you should give yourself permission to have these feelings. They are totally normal.

 

[Mea]

Auntcarrie thank you for the advice, my little ones were 3 weeks early.

I had a slightly better night with the twins, but little Sam is still only taking 2 oz at night then waking a couple of hours later. But then Josh my 3 year old threw up all over me and our bed at 4 this morning!!!!

 

[auntcarrie]

Auntcarrie thank you for the advice, my little ones were 3 weeks early.

I had a slightly better night with the twins, but little Sam is still only taking 2 oz at night then waking a couple of hours later. But then Josh my 3 year old threw up all over me and our bed at 4 this morning!!!!

If I have a second I'll look up the intake amounts my girls were taking at 5 - 6 weeks... 2 oz might be all he can handle at this time, every 3 hrs or so... I honestly can't remember.

And sorry, no advice about the puking!!! BOO!

 

[chan8180]

Oh hun i totally feel your pain! Mine are nearly 12 weeks and stil doing this, ive had a few mornings the last week or so in tears at 6 am., My toddler is constantly being woken in night as shes a light sleeper so i have a tired moddy toddler which is not a good mix with a tired and stressed out mummy

I dont know how to make them take more at feed time i breastfeed at day and bottle feed at night. Issac still only take 3 ounces at 12 weeks if he has a day bottle when im away from home. During the night though he only takes 1-2 oz so wakes an hour or two later. Lucas also wakes twice in the night and at different times to Isaac no matter how much i try to sync them and again will only take 1-2 ounces when i know he can take 5 during the day. I have just had to go with it and hope it gets better. Both babies seem to be grazers, even during day when breastfeeding especially Isaac lately so may just be like this for a while??

My daughter was also very good and slept through from 6 weeks and she was breastfed with a night bottle but the difference was she took about 6 ounces at their age at night? Yours are very new still so may settle, i think mine are getting into bad habits as they were fine but seem to be getting worse??

I think the grazing is definitely getting worse with Isaac, probably caused by his permanent cold and generally being lazy anyway. Im really considering bottle feeding him all the time as he seems to be getting fussy and im having to constantly top him up again. I think he would do much better on bottles as he takes them well, much better than Lucas. I just need to accept it and do it but thats easier said than done.