best friend acting strange...

[Little G]

Hey ladies

I dont know if Im being over sensitive and stupid preggo hormones are making me feel this way, I've hardly heard from my best friend since telling her Im expecting again. Hadn't heard from her in weeks then she sent me a message on fb, a photo of her new car and how excited she was about it, no question asked how I was or feeling. Again weeks had passed, I went for my 12 week scan last week and sent her a text with scan piccy, she sent back saying ' ah lovely, whats your due date? ' text back telling her and again no reply back, nothing....? Then today she text me telling me to go round for a visit, I wasnt able to as dd was about to go for a nap, made my apologies and reason, her reply, ok dont worry. Again no question as in, how are you anyway etc etc.... Is it just me or is she being insensitive to the fact im PREGNANT! lol... I told her right at the beginning I was really ill with being sick, surely Im right to expect the question.... how are you feeling now????

Sorry for the rant, just had to get it off my chest.

xx

 

[zorak]

OK, I am going to turn this round. Maybe you are the one being insensitive? You haven't mentioned if she has kids/ wants kids/ is possably unbeknowest to you undergoing fertility issues.

Yes you are pregnant, but that doesn't mean eveyone around you needs to be thinking about it the whole time.

 

[misspriss]

Without knowing about her situation at all, it's really hard to say.

 

[Little G]

she had 2 kids, she's in a happy relationship, no fertility problems, she doesnt want any more babies for sure, there are no other problems that im fully aware of. Im aware people have their own lives to lead, all Im asking for is a bit of acknowledgment to the fact considering I've been ill for about 8 weeks now, if the shoe was on the other foot I would certainly be asking how she was!

 

[sally88]

Maybe u need to ask her how she is feeling?? Something may be going on that she hasn't told u xx

 

[misspriss]

Hm, maybe there is something else going on. Were you in regular contact before and she just dropped off?

 

[Little G]

OK, I am going to turn this round. Maybe you are the one being insensitive? You haven't mentioned if she has kids/ wants kids/ is possably unbeknowest to you undergoing fertility issues.

Yes you are pregnant, but that doesn't mean eveyone around you needs to be thinking about it the whole time.

I certainly wouldnt say im the one being insensitive, Im quite aware not everyone needs to be thinking about me and my pregnancy, all Im wondering about is my best friend and if im over reacting, thats all.

 

[Little G]

Hm, maybe there is something else going on. Were you in regular contact before and she just dropped off?

Yeah pretty much, she made a couple of jokey comments on fb about me not being able to go round to hers and have a drink with her at the weekend, but dont think thats the problem, our nights out were few and far between anyway.

 

[Sarah1508]

Okay just throwing that out there but that first comment was pretty damn harsh.. Ha, Anyways considering what you have said it sounds like you's both have busy life's! And maybe just need to make more time for eachother I've found its easier being honest with friends and maybe just be like "hey I'm sorry i haven't been that available lately but I've had a bit going on" and then just explain how you would love to set time aside however often to spend together and then both try your hardest to stick to the plans haha

 

[Little G]

Maybe u need to ask her how she is feeling?? Something may be going on that she hasn't told u xx

Maybe, but she's usually quite good at phoning and saying if something is bothering her, acht I dont know, maybe Im just looking into things too much, just find it a bit strange she hasnt really asked me how I am knowing id been puking my guts up for weeks or shown much interest, she acted differntly when it was dd.

 

[zorak]

I didn't mean to come across as harsh. Like I said from the first post we didn't have all the info.

OP - it sounds like she may be somehow afraid of losing you a bit more because oyu are going to be busy with the new baby.

 

[Little G]

Okay just throwing that out there but that first comment was pretty damn harsh.. Ha, Anyways considering what you have said it sounds like you's both have busy life's! And maybe just need to make more time for eachother I've found its easier being honest with friends and maybe just be like "hey I'm sorry i haven't been that available lately but I've had a bit going on" and then just explain how you would love to set time aside however often to spend together and then both try your hardest to stick to the plans haha

Yeah I thought so too,

Perhaps should have explained her side a bit better tho.

Yeah maybe just need a proper catch up and havent seen each other in a while, usually just messaging or phoning. Just didnt know if its me being the crazy preggo lady over thinking things. lol

xx

 

[Little G]

I didn't mean to come across as harsh. Like I said from the first post we didn't have all the info.

OP - it sounds like she may be somehow afraid of losing you a bit more because oyu are going to be busy with the new baby.

Yeah quite possibly, I dont know if she was used to having me there before dd then as you say she might be thinking she'll never see me now.
I dont know, guess time will tell as it goes on.

 

[Sarah1508]

Haha you never know it may be the crazy prego lady thing kicking in I know I'm like that , too much of a worrier even when I'm not pregnant but I'd say it's best just to be honest with her she is your mate after all and I'm sure if nothing is actually up you's will soon be laughing about how hormones can make you go crazy!

 

[Little G]

Haha you never know it may be the crazy prego lady thing kicking in I know I'm like that , too much of a worrier even when I'm not pregnant but I'd say it's best just to be honest with her she is your mate after all and I'm sure if nothing is actually up you's will soon be laughing about how hormones can make you go crazy!

Yeah im pretty much the same, perhaps if spoke to her about it she would totally disagree and its just me thats going out of my mind! lol
x

 

[THart]

She could actually be trying to be sensitive.

I was sick this pregnancy but wasn't with my first. And being asked very single day by various people how I am I doing just set me off.

So maybe where she has been through it she thinks she is showing sensitivity by jot bringing it up, as she may believe you are already being bombarded about it.

From the little bit of information you've given. I don't think she is being any.more insensitive than you in regards to not communicating with each other about your lives.

 

[Heather.1987]

.

 

[zaycain]

Funny.. It was the other way around for me.

Before I was pregnant, my BFF became pregnant. All she did was talk about her pregnancy and never asked how I was. I was having ovary issues and thought I might have surgery but she never asked how I was doing. I just had to hear all about the pregnancy.

I finally told her that I am happy for.. but she needs to start asking me how I am doing, otherwise it's too much of a one sided relationship.

Since then she makes an effort to ask.

Of course.. she still doesn't know I am pregnant, but I appreciate even more because she's asking just to ask and to make sure I'm ok.

 

[Little G]

thanks for the some of the positive feedback, I think some of you ladies are grabbing the wrong end of the stick tho. I dont think my pregnancy revolves around everyone else and everyone should be thinking about me, there was one person in question, my friend! As for not asking questions about her, any time we speak on the phone thats all I do, ask her about her, not once have i mentioned my pregnancy, anyway perhaps I'll think twice about venting on here again didnt expect such negative comments from some people

 

[Little G]

Congrats on your pregnancy, but I think you need to chill on the thoughts that everyone needs to worry about you all the time. She shouldn't be expected to ask about you every single time. Have you asked about her recently? Maybe try asking her some questions. Your pregnancy may revolve around your every thought and action (been there done that...doing that now) but not around everyone elses.

hang on, she doesnt ask me at all, thats the problem, yes I've asked about her, all the time in fact, I didnt for one say my pregnancy revolved around everyone and I certainly dont feel that way.