Birth disapointment

[youngmommy2]

I had spinal surgery 8 years ago and had rods put into my spine. My OB told me to bring the xrays of them i had and she took one look at them and asked me to sit down. She said that the way they are placed would not be favorable for an epidural or spinal. that means that i cant have an epi during labor, or if i get a c section they have to put me under with general anestesia(sp?)
and ill miss the birth of my baby. Im so upset, i feel like ive been robbed of this birthing experience that i wanted. Ughh *tear*

 

[Kristin52]

oh that stinks. but you just gotta do what you gotta do. maybe you can tough if out through labor if baby is cooperating that day and you don't need a c-section, you can deal with labor through IV meds. Best of luck!

 

[emma.c89]

I'm having my LO by c section under general. really starting to worry whats going to happen at babys birth I'd love to be the first to hold my little boy but I wont be supposr I just gotta suck it up, theres no other way he's coming out x

 

[cinnamum]

i have never needed a epi.
I had an emergency csection and had to have the gas.
It took me a while to get over it but hey...

Look at my gorgeous boy! He's all that matters right???

You'll feel differently about it when the time comes, look into different types of pain relief.
Perhaps rent a tens machine, i used one last time and it was marvellous! Xxxxx

 

[cupcakemomma]

Oh, that really stinks I really hope you'll have a super easy labor so you won't even miss the epidural (and won't need a c-section!)

 

[bumpbear]

Really look in to active birth and yoga?

 

[Hodge-Podge]

Can you not have a spinal tap and have a c-section? That's what my friend had to do because she too had a rod in her back. They told her she couldn't have a an epi because it wouldn't take so she couldn't even try having her naturally but she could and did have a c-section with a spinal tap.

 

[bumpbear]

they still let you try for a natural birth if you can't have an epi, don't they? I only know of one person who actually had an epi (in the UK).

 

[youngmommy2]

of course i can go naturally but i know myself and my pain threshold is non existant and im from the US where epidurals are very common

 

[dragonneyes]

Think about the upsides, though!

- No epidural means your baby pops out awake and ready to nurse.
- You can avoid the "cascade effect" complications that sometimes come as a result of an epidural, such as the failure to progress due to a loss of the desire to push (requiring vacuum extractions, forceps, c-sections).
- Birth pain actually helps the baby's head guide out more slowly, since Mom can feel everything going on down there. I've heard it said that a slow, deliberate birth, as opposed to the "GET THIS THING OUT OF ME NOW" mentality, helps prevent nasty tears and episiotomies.

I'm willfully choosing a no-medication-unless-absolutely-necessary approach to my birth, and would love to explore it with you. I've done very little to check into natural pain management techniques as of yet, though, so I don't even know where to start!

 

[Nathyrra]

Sorry to hear that you wont get the kind of birth you hoped for.

As someone that's gone through the same thing I can say that it's really not that bad. Infact I got a very unique birthing experience, me and hubby joke about it that I went to sleep and woke up a mommy! hehe. Not many people can say that hey? I also have clamps in my spine. I wasn't aloud to natural birth, and I wasn't aloud an epidural with the section. But because I was well aware of this from the get go I was prepared and was ok with it. Actually, I really cherish the first memory I have waking up. Opening my eyes and my hubby is sitting there in front of me, cooing with this wee ball of perfection. As soon as I was more awake I was still the first one to get skin to skin and it was still a really wonderful moment.

 

[bumpbear]

of course i can go naturally but i know myself and my pain threshold is non existant and im from the US where epidurals are very common

I'm in the US, and its my first one too, so I am slightly terrified of the thought of childbirth. I do know that I want a natural birth with no meds (if i can manage the pain) though. All of my buddies that have had natural birth say that you need to psyche yourself in to thinking you can do it by reading plenty about childbirth over the remaining months, doing yoga & breathing exercises, going to child birth classes and having a birth plan that your birth partner & OB will stick to when you're in labour. This book has been highly recommended by so many of my friends who have had med-free labour:

https://www.amazon.com/Active-Birth-Approach-Naturally-Revised/dp/1558320385

They are not new age friends who refused to have meds outright. They are ladies who wanted to give natural birth a shot with the option of medical intervention if they needed it. They all gave birth in average hospitals in the UK. I am going to give it my best endeavours. I have found a hospital in NY that has a minimum-intervention approach to labour and delivery (they have a birthing center adjacent to its usual labour and delivery ward and you can easily switch from one to the other if you realise you need an epi in the end), which I like the idea of. I also have a list of obs who will deliver there so I am in the process of trying to switch from my current OB who has a very medicalised approach to childbirth which I think is unnecessary since its such a natural process.

Sorry if I am sounding preachy - I really dont mean to. But you sound very upset at the thought of not having the birth you want, so I thought you might like more info on this option. I know its not common in the US so perhaps its not something you've discussed with your OB?

Have you seen the business of being born (about the US maternity health care system)? It's worth a watch. A very one sided view supporting home births v hospital and not balanced at all, but it does provide some valid arguments about why more natural approaches may be beneficial.

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt0995061/

 

[gingerwhinger]

If the worse case scenario happens and you end up with a c section while asleep then just to let you know it really isn't that bad - by that stage you are just desperate to have your baby out. I had to be asleep with my son as it was a major emergency by then and they needed to do the fastest thing and that was to put me to sleep and cut him out quick (they even accidently cut his arm in their haste!) but I would go to sleep for a month if it meant my beautiful boy was delivered safe and well. It was only 45 minutes until we were reunited and he knew who I was the minute we were wheeled next to one another. Love at first sight for me, no different to had I have had him naturally and him been placed straight on me. So think positive, even if worse comes to worse it will be just fine I promise x

 

[MommyJaan]

Dont let it weigh you down- The birth itself is only a moment among several moments which you will look forward to. Its part of your babies life, not the whole of it. Hope all works out for you =)

 

[MummytoSummer]

Aw I'm sorry Hun. It can't be easy having your labour and birth more or less Dictacted to you months before hand.

As others have said though, look into alternative pain relief methods now. Someone suggested a tens machine, I know people that swear by them.

I thought my labour was going to be a lovely straightforward by the book labour when it started with my waters breaking and contractions on cue. But no, my body had other ideas and nearly 90 hours later I was still getting nowhere with more risk to my baby. I was handling my contractions just fine until I was put on an iv to induce me and bring on stronger contractions, then I needed an epidural. Unfortunately my body still wasn't having any of it and I ended up being whisked off down for an emergency c section with a spinal block.

It's really hard to cope with when you've had such a set picture of what your birth will be like and it took me months before I could talk about it without crying, but I know that what they did was the safest way for myself and my baby and for that I'm grateful. This time around I'm going for a planned c section so at least this time I know what I'm in for and hopefully it'll be a much calmer experience than my last rushed scary experience.

Good luck and I really hope you can have your natural labour.

X