Birth Partner for Natural Birth @ Birthing Center

[aka_twinks]

Hello all! (I have been lurking around here, getting ideas & tips, but this is my first post, Happy New Year, BTW!)

My friend is due the 12th of this month & is delivering natural, in water hopefully, at a birthing center. (Her house is too far from a hospital for it to be safe.) So I am her birth partner for 2 reasons, 1, she thinks i will be more helpful then her husband & 2, i know she wants a natural birth and i am to be her strong rock when she wants drugs, lol. We have been thru a bunch of classes & from what ive gather on this thread, we are ready, lol, as if one could actually every truly be ready for this!

Her question to me was, how can i bring on labor NOW without actually 'forcing' it such as with caster oil (which after 40 weeks, she is fine with taking, lol)...so now i bring the question to all of you in your wisdoms & experiences! (we know the walking & ones so anything else?!) oh yeah, any tips or suggestions for me as the helper or for her to do, PLEASE, we could use all the advice you have!!

 

[Mervs Mum]

My advice is DONT! Babies lungs are thought to secrete hormones that trigger labour when they are fully matured. The safest place the baby will EVER be is in it's mother's womb.....they are clever.....they come when they are physically ready...

 

[aka_twinks]

((I happen to agree with you!!)) But I had to ask, told her I would, & now I have the best answer!! THANKS!!

 

[Jenniflower]

My advice is DONT! Babies lungs are thought to secrete hormones that trigger labour when they are fully matured. The safest place the baby will EVER be is in it's mother's womb.....they are clever.....they come when they are physically ready...

I completely agree. There are only a few things I'm taking and that's merely to help my labour along. Those would be Raspberry Leaf Tea - meant to tone the uterus. And Evening Primrose Oil/Starflower oil. Some people saying this is meant to "Bring on labour" But it won't do anything unless your baby is ready to come out. What it will do is help to thin your cervix (It is a prostaglandin precursor much like sperm is) when the time comes and hopefully cause for an easier first bit of labour and transition.

Other than that though, all the bouncing/walking/sexing/pinapple eating in the world isn't going to make bubs come any sooner than they're truely ready. And anything that would cause them to come sooner isn't really that safe.

Good luck though with being her birthing partner! I hope everything goes well, keep us updated if you want.

 

[aka_twinks]

hey Jenniflower, thanks so much for the advice!
my other area of concern, what kinds of things can i do while she is laboring? (early labor has to be done @ home until she is 5.1.1.)
& ill definitely keep yall up to date! this is my 1st experience, up close, with a woman giving birth, im nervous & excited & scared outta my mind all @ once, i really cant wait til it is my turn!!!

 

[Jenniflower]

Hmmm let's see...

From my point of view I'm wanting my birth partner to be calm in everything he does. If I ask for a rub, or some water, or food. I don't want him to be jumpy about it, I just want him to quietly say "ok, I'll be right back" and then move slowly without me even realizing.

Also make sure you're making her drink, she'll forget about this (according to everyone else) so you really want to encourage her to do so.

Be her advocate. DO NOT let the midwives offer her anything you have discussed that she doesn't want. If they have a concern let them know to go to you first, then you can filter out the important things to tell her.

Sometimes women in water love to have water poured on their backs. But be warned, some birthing partners who start this are then not allowed to stop! hahaha.

 

[aka_twinks]

UPDATE::

So its my BFF's due date... she is 60% effaced, 1/2cm dilated & has lost very small amount of her mucus plug. So we are still waiting...She has finally decided that she is going to go into labor when the baby wants too & is happy to sit back & wait!! YES! So that's my update!

 

[Mervs Mum]

 

[kiwimama]

I'm glad your friend decided against castor oil - nasty stuff!
It sounds as though you will be great as her birth companion. Just be there for her, be her quiet supporter.

 

[aka_twinks]

So she is officially 1 week over due & has been hospitalized overnight, yesterday, for the flu, with high blood pressure & heart rate. They might be keeping her until the baby is born.

Side note: On her due date, her father-in-law (who i love like a creepy uncle) collapsed & has been hospitalized ever since in an induced coma, due to lack of oxygen when he collapsed, & after all the tests they have no brain functions showing. She has been by his side this whole time until now. So right now, her DH (one of my best friends from school, i like to think i kinda hooked them up) is going back & forth between rooms to his father, who is probably brain dead & will have to decide to end his life support, & his wife, a week over due & sick, who's body seems to be too stressed to want to deliver. The hospital is just under an hours drive away so its not making it any easier since he still has to work 3, 13 hr shifts/week. This is his 2nd grandchild, the 1st one born just a few months ago & i dont think he has even really seen the her yet either cuz live farther away. I hate that this is happening & feel helpless.
I dont know why i just added this last part bout her FIL, but i felt good to get it out. Thanks for listening!

 

[Jenniflower]

oh hun I'm so sorry to hear about your friend. If it sounds like they will be keeping her than your role will be that much more important to keep her calm and let her see she can still totally do it and that you'll be there every step of the way. But Oh my gosh about her FiL her poor husband must just be in a state which in relation I sure isn't helping her stay calm. I'll pray for your strength to help her through this and for the strength in her family in general. Always feel free to stop by and vent hun.

 

[aka_twinks]

Thanks Jenniflower!

 

[Bournefree]

Wow that is a tough time! - and that comment is a horrible understatement I know! - I'll also be praying for their family and for your strengh for them.
XxX

 

[Mervs Mum]

sending love and light x

 

[aka_twinks]

So I'm sitting in th waiting room @ the Center. She decided to labor and deliver alone with her husband and mw so now were all waiting. She has bEen pushi g a while now...next update should be about baby peyton!

 

[aka_twinks]

She did great, even without me in there, i could hear how well she did. ill be honest, i was upset that she sidelined me but, its her baby, her day, her choices. she labored in the pool almost the whole time. they listened to the hb & needed to do check, felt the waters bulging so they made her get out & on the bed so they could break her water, there was a bit of meconium so they made her stay on the bed & started pushing. (to avoid need to transfer to the hospital, they had to get baby out kinda quickly. out she came, dad cut the cord after a lil while & all 3 of them are great now, baby latched on right away & they should be sent home within the hour! thanks for all of yall support, it was great to have someone to turn too! hopefully it wont be to long before im on here for myself! (heres hoping anyway!)

 

[Jenniflower]

That's so great hun! Glad everything worked out in the end. I know it must have been a bummer that you were sidelined but they knew you were there no matter what and in the end that's what was important. Hope to see you around here again

 

[Mervs Mum]

Glad it all worked out for you. Dont feel sad that you were 'sidelined'. Never underestimate how much your support will have meant and it wasnt necessarily that she didnt WANT you there - she felt so well supported that maybe she didnt NEED you - and that's only ever a good thing

x