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Bit of a babble (longish)

HippyGirl

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Hi Ladies,

I want (no need) to have a bit of a babble, so please excuse my ramblings while I do so.

I never wanted to be married. When I was younger it was just my mother and me against the world. She was/is my rock. She was a single mother and a fantastic one at that, I had always imagined that I would be a single parent too, strong, independant, formidable. That was until I met my now husband. I enjoyed our time together and suddenly we had been together for over 5 years. I didn't know where the time had gone, I just knew that I was head over heels in love and couldn't imagine my life without him. I knew at that moment that if he ever asked me to marry him, my answer would be a resounding yes!

So as you might have guessed, he asked, I said yes and we had the most beautifully intimate wedding (20 guests). Surrounded by our closest of closest family and friends we declared our love. :wedding:

We found a perfect place to live and then had a talk about trying to concieve. We both knew that we wanted children, I had always thought that I wanted my career first and children later. I love my job, its extremely challenging, but rewarding as well (I am a drug and alcohol counsellor). Once we spoke about trying to concieve the general understanding that we came to was that we would try to concieve but we wouldn't be stressed if it didnt happen straight away.

That was the theory. In reality as soon as we spoke about it and made the decision to try to fall pregnant, I have actively obsessed about it. We made the decision to not tell anyone we were trying (which has been difficult). So since that conversation I have become my own worst enemy, I have charted, I have religiously checked my ovulation predictors and I have symptom checked (despite telling myself that I never would).

So here I sit, at work, attempting to concentrate when all I can really think of is that i am 6 DPO and have had cramps the last 2 days. I also thought my boobs were bigger and veiny last month (DH fed this delusion, agreeing that my boobs had grown) and the month before AF was days late, very unusual for me.

So whilst I am in the grip of the dreaded 2ww I needed to have a rant about symptoms I am inventing in my head, forcing myself to see things that aren't and all for something that until now, i didn't know I wanted. And now that I want :yellow: I cant seem to think of anything else.

I am so excited and encouraged when I read of all the other ladies :bfp: and desperately want my own..

Best of luck to all that are TTC

:dust::dust::dust::dust::dust::dust:
 
Best of luck to you too! :dust:
You will have lots of ladies to talk to here. C:
 
Beautiful story! Lots of us feel the same way about TTC. Good luck to you!
 

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