Calling all mummies with more than 1 child...

Babybear1985

Mother of 1 & Expecting
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Hello :)

Just wanting some feedback really on how you find it with more than one little one?!

My lg is 18 months old now and me and oh have decided to ttc our 2nd and although Ive always wanted another baby it keeps popping in my mind how hard it must be to have a toddler and newborn so any feedback/advice etc would be great xxx
 
Ds1 was 18 months when ds2 was born and it has been hard at times - should have seen me at 5.30 this afternoon when I had to leave the room to take a breath coz of the crying!! But I adore my boys and think they will be great playmates for eachother as they grow. I can't even imagine what it would be like having only one child now.
 
Honestly, its not near as bad as I was thinking it would be. I had all these images of my toddler being super jealous since he has had all of our attention til now, but its actually the opposite. He LOVES the baby, always wants to help. It is definitely more hectic to get anything done, go anywhere, take care of both kids and the house, and work, but all in al, things are pretty good:) I think once you can get into a routine it gets a lot easier. Now that my baby is sleeping more, and we have figured out his routine better, things seem to be much better. It was hard at first because he had no routine, obviously as a newborn, so I would be exhausted because I couldn't nap with my 2 yr old awake, and they didn't always nap at the same time. Now I am better able to manage it on my days off to where I can fit a nap in with them both sleeping at the same time if I didn't get enough sleep. But the first month or so was exhausting, I won't lie. lol
 
Hi, didn't want to read and run. Well im still pretty new to it, but were doing ok so far. I have a 10 year old step daughter who lives with us full time and Aleesha my first born (3 on the 28th). Aleesha was a bit unsure at first although we talked about "Baby Jazmine" not long after my first scan.
There was a little jealousy. Aleesha is quite clingy and I was worried about this...her feeling left out as she didn't really want to join in or cuddle her, but she has come around now....and loves her sister and gives her lots of cuddles and loves helping. It must be so hard for them..adjusting.

But anyway were doing well, we havent been out much due to the weather and trying to get into some sort of routine but we have been getting out to the local shops/school/walks and Aleesha has been going out during the day with family and we do the park at weekends. iI think I might start going back to playgroup in a week or so or get granny to do it. She starts nursery in January which will be great for her, she needs it. I am amazed at how good she has been at occupying herself though and this is just a very recent thing, she will play in her room for a while and we do painting/drawing.

Aleesha still wakes in the night (but only for 1 minute). Dad deals with her now and I feed Jazmine. He also now puts the kids up to bed at 8/8.30ish (which I used to do). and we try and get tidied up for 9.30pm so we can have some sit down time!!! pwhaaarr, how much I cherish that time!

You would be amazed at how baby just fits in with the family, before that I had my worries about how we would manage etc, but you just do. Its like when you have your first baby you just get more "organized" if you know what I mean.

Well sorry to ramble on, hopefully some of what I have said has helped xxx
 
I've got 29 months apart (29 months and 1.5 weeks).

It's been WAY easier than I thought.

My first was very colicky difficult baby and my second is easygoing. That has made the difference.

If it had been the other way around, it would be a nightmare I think! :)
 
My little one is 17 months and we're currently pregnant. 2 of my other children are actually closer in age then these 2 will be. It gets easier when you establish a routine and it's really not that bad :) I enjoy having my children a little closer in age.
 
I haven't gotten to the baby and toddler/baby part yet, but sheesh having a pregnancy with a baby/toddler is ROUGH. Just make sure you prepare yourself to be short-fused with your child and too exhausted to play as much as you usually do.
 
I agree with the above poster... Pregnancy with another child is extremely difficult! I've not even had a bad pregnancy, but its the tiredness and not being able to get up as quickly as you'd like to when DD1 is about to pull a dining-chair on top of herself! Lol. But I m very much looking forward to my babies growing up best friends :)
 
It's early days here but it's not been an easy road for us. Ds has silent reflux were still trying to get under control so is naturally a screamy and needy baby, which makes trying to do anything with dd hard. Though when we're in a good spell with ds it's getting easier to juggle. Dd loves her brother though tells everyone he cries lots! The best thing we've found for dd is not disrupting her routine too much so he still goes to nursery (for a break lol) and swimming etc, do she just sees ds as a rather loud addition to the house.
 
It's not without it's challenges, but the rewards are immense!

Earl was 2 years and 7 months when Eddy was born (took us 8 months to conceive - started when he was 15 months) and I would say that on balance it's been great. He's not been jealous really. As predicted though, the more mobile and interactive Eddy is getting, the more he's getting a bit put out, but communication and time management are keeping this to a minimum I think. Pregnancy was hard. Working 30 hours a week, then looking after Earl when not there took it's toll and I was quite poorly, but once I started my mat leave it all subsided and I really enjoyed the time to ourselves. Eddy is so laid back he's horizontal most of the time lol and this helps a lot. I don't expect it to stay like this - I'm expecting it to all become like a mad house when Eddy gets mobile which I'm sure wont be far off. I reckon I have 3 more months max lol. Now that Eddy is working to a schedule (has been since 12 weeks) it's easier to get out and about. Earl goes to pre-school and loves it. Eddy is a really smiley baby and seeing them play together, I can just see how much they love one another. I'm really not looking forward to the transition back to work though. I love having all this time to spend with the pair of them. Luckily my hubby is very hands-on so hopefully it wont be too traumatic for any of us.
 
It's early days here but it's not been an easy road for us. Ds has silent reflux were still trying to get under control so is naturally a screamy and needy baby, which makes trying to do anything with dd hard. Though when we're in a good spell with ds it's getting easier to juggle. Dd loves her brother though tells everyone he cries lots! The best thing we've found for dd is not disrupting her routine too much so he still goes to nursery (for a break lol) and swimming etc, do she just sees ds as a rather loud addition to the house.

This is me too, DS2 has reflux, had colic, cmpi and a few other problems. It has been hard, I won't lie! But, when I see him smiling at DS1 when he is being a bit daft, it makes it all worth it! The fact that DS1 was such a textbook chld made it that bit harder to adjust but I think we may be coming out the other side. DS1 still has his routine with nursery and seeing nanny so nothing has really changed, he regressed a bit with toilet training (he was completely dry) as he said he wanted to be a baby but we tackled that one well! We made him realise babies can't have toys or nice food so that snapped him out of it!

All in all it is rewarding, you just have to be that bit more organised! I just look at how quick my first has grown and remember to try and cherish the time with my baby! X
 
Pregnancy with a toddler was much, much harder than parenting a baby and toddler, in my experience. I'm a SAHM and I found it pretty exhausting even though it was a smooth pregnancy and homebirth.

My eldest has taken to it well as we just get on with life as before. I babywear and nurse baby in the sling and, as my partner often works 9am-10pm, I have to keep on top of the house, cooking, bedtimes myself a lot and I manage just fine. It's not the easiest thing in the world but I'm glad the gap is small, once baby is a bit older and more mobile I think things will start to become a lot easier for us as our eldest will have a playmate and baby will be less frustrated (she's only 3m but already desperate to get going!) and, other than normal toddler frustrations that are handled responsively, there's nothing more to it than that for us.

I will say, though, don't do it unless your toddler is a good sleeper. Ours has sttn since 9m and even though she still cosleeps it made the early days so much easier and now that baby only wakes once a night it is great being able to recharge and give them the energy they need in the day.
 
its hard bloody work :( im on a downer day tho lol
 
awwww thank you so much to everybody who has commented so far, your experiencence, views and general info has been really helpful. Keep it coming cos im loving reading about what its like to have more than one little munchkin :) The good, the bad and the ugly i love reading about it xxx
 
I will be honest, the first 3 months I found really hard. I was so exhausted and felt guilty about my toddler not getting enough attention. My lo fed every two hours 24/7 so it was hard.
Now though I absolutely love it. It was so much easier once my lo got into a routine and fed less often, could entertain himself for a bit so I could make my toddler lunch or whatever. He could self settle at that point too so when he went down for naps I had quality time with my toddler.
My toddler absolutely adores him, I get her involved in any way I can so she doesn't feel left out. She loves to help getting all the nappy stuff out, giving back his toys if he drops them, giving him kisses and cuddles. I just absolutely love it :) xx
 
Yes the guilt is the worst!

Especially the first few days, I found. I felt great after the birth but my toddler's sadness felt sooooooooo bad
 
My eldest turned 3 six days after Rory was born. I wish the gap was smaller but my 3 year old is very independent now so it makes things easier. It's tiring having any babies xx
 
Oh the point ill say though is that breast feeding for me was a nightmare with two. Couldn't do anything with Logan for being glued to the couch feeding.
 
My son was 2 years 4 months When my daughter was been. It hasn't been as hard as I thought it was and I'm really happy with the age gap we have xx
 
Some days are extremely easy, some days are really tough. My DD ended up being very high needs and demands to be held at all times. It is almost impossible right now to put her down when she sleeps. Thankfully, my son is very low needs and doesn't mind playing with himself.

Even with my high needs daughter though, i will say it is easier than I thought it would be and I'm actually enjoying the close age. I thought I would never get another moment to myself with two but that isn't the case. You learn little tricks along the way to simplify things...like I always baby carry. My LO goes to sleep instantly in the carrier and I can be out with my kids for hours and DD sleeps the whole time in the carrier so shopping is easy. Just little tricks like that...
 

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