Child Care

[spunky84]

I only have 6 weeks maternity leave (unless there is a medical reason in which I need to take more time). DH and I both work full time.

DH is loosing sleep over what we're going to do about child care when I return to work. I'm also trying to figure out what we're going to do.

DH is hopefully going to be applying for a job that is in the evenings - I still need to get the rest of the info from my co-worker Monday. If he's able to get this job, we won't have to worry about it because he'll be home in the days, me in the evenings. We'll just have to worry about a couple of hours on Fridays.

However, obviously as nothing is set in stone, I want to start looking into this so we have something in place & DH can start to sleep better at night. I'm just not sure on where to start.

The only thing I know for sure is that neither of us want to go with a daycare. We both feel that we'll be paying a whole lot of money for one adult to be caring for several children at one time & worry that ours won't get what it needs.

We'd prefer to go the route of baby sitter. Obviously babysitters can cost just as much as daycare, but there'd be more one-on-one. Then you have to be able to trust the person. I just really don't know where to begin.

For those who already have children & work, what do you do for child care while at work?

For first time mom's, what are you planning on doing?

 

[MamaFlick]

I found a middle ground between typical daycare and baby sitter. I found a lady who watches max 4 infants, and a few other children (all small children). Her and her husband run the "daycare" from her home. I sat down and watched how she interacted with the children and I felt comfortable with it. Also they do all organic home grown veggies and such.. that made me happy. $26 per day. And it's right down the street from where I work, so I can go and breastfeed on my lunch.

I realize this may not be the personalized care you are after, but I just thought I'd share.

 

[sue_88]

Personally, My baby will be going into nursery at 7/8 months old after my leave.

Have you considered an Au Pair?

 

[JJWEBB]

Does your state disability give the extra 6 weeks for baby bonding time? Here in California, we get 6 weeks paid disability leave, and then 6 weeks family/baby bonding time.

My husband and I cant afford daycare either, its SO expensive here in the San Francisco Bay. Luckily, he owns his own business and is flexible with his hours. Hell be watching her most of the time. I want to find a drop in type of daycare so she can go there a couple days out of the week when we need to

 

[MrsTAZ]

Our son currently goes to a private preschool that begins care at 12 weeks (we each have a 12 week leave thankfully). The rooms each have multiple teachers/caregivers with a maximum number of infants per room. They're equipped with monitors and webcams you can securely log into. I have developed a fantastic relationship with the director (I am very cautious about leaving my child with people, I dread August when school starts!) and feel more comfortable leaving my child in a secure environment rather than a strangers home. That's just my feelings on it though - I know many fantastic parents that do in-home care for their children. We are lucky in that the baby will only be there 3 days a week for about 7 hours a day because of my husbands schedule.

I would look for a nanny service in your area that conduct full screenings on their staff. I'd look for reviews on the company and then require references for each person I considered. I would do similar for an in-home daycare. I'd find out if they have any accredations and require references.

You just can't be too safe in today's world! Good Luck - I think finding child care is a pretty stressful thing (but maybe because I am very cautious and thorough)!

 

[havestar]

With our 2nd, we tried a home daycare. She was regulated, fewer children and had excellent references. That didn't stop us from pulling him out when my husband and another man walked in through her unlocked front door while she was in the bathroom. The other man took his kid, without her knowing, but my husband waited to say something. That was the LAST time we ever used a single-person daycare option.

Since my husband and I both work at home, I'm planning on keeping the baby at home as long as possible. When she's at a more active stage, we'll most likely put her in a Montessori-type school, just like our other children. Our kids have really benefited from the curriculum, and I feel the social interaction is important.

 

[Amberyll23]

My DD is in a learning center (not really daycare, because in no way does she get dropped off and left to fend for herself), the state has strict regulations for child-teacher ratio (I believe it is 4 children to 1 teacher). The teachers she has had from infant and now in the young toddlers room are outstanding and she LOVES school. That being said, it can be quite expensive depending on what is available in your area, etc.

There are professional websites where you can search for nannies and babysitters who get background checks and who you can do interviews with, etc. I know my close friend in Baltimore went with such an arrangement with her little boy, and she had great results with it.

I guess another option would be if you have close family nearby that you trust who would be willing to watch the baby? I grew up being watched by my grandmother during the day while my parents worked. I wish this had been an option for us, but sadly the closest relative we have is 3 hours away!!

 

[Kitteh_Kat]

My husband and I work opposite schedules, so he'll have her during the day and I'll have her at night. A couple of the ladies at work use the same woman to watch their little ones, which they love because she is always sending them pictures and updates throughout the day, and their children grow up knowing each other just like their moms. Maybe ask around your work and see if any of the other mothers have recommendations based on your area?

 

[AdriansMama]

Omg here in Ontario Canada we get a year ... I couldn't imagine walking away from my 6 week old baby for an hour let alone an entire work day ... That just seems crazy to me lol

 

[IndieBelle]

If you are going day care so soon, my advice is to start looking now. Here in Aus, most places (especially the good ones) have a waiting list at least 1year long. Look early so you can find one the one that you like and feel comfortable with, with a baby room that has a small amount of babies in the room. With a 1:4 ratio, some rooms have 8 babies aged until 12 months and some have up to 15 babies until the age of 2 years.

I have worked with a baby room with such a young aged baby and they usually get the most attention as they are so young. It also depends in the ratio where you are.

Have a look at family day care as well. There would be a smaller number of children and it would be a more homey environment.

 

[Jess137]

Mine will go to an in home daycare after I go back to work at 10 weeks. The same woman who watched my cousins from 6 weeks old on. Mine will be the only infant. She has three other children from 15 months to 4 years, and none are there full time. She only takes on one infant at a time. It's $160 per week but I don't have any other choice as DH and I both have to work full time to get by.

 

[CatherineK]

My husband and I work opposite shifts. (I work 600-1430 he works 1445-2245). We work at the same place so, we swap kids in the parking lot every day. Works great for us. We get all the same weekends and holidays off, so we still have family time together. But we get to raise out kids full time. With three kids, it saves us $$$.

 

[pebbie1]

My daughter was in nursery (day care). We changed it to a child minder for money reasons but my girl hated it and got really upset every time I dropped her off.
Cost wise the difference wasnt that much between nursery and the childminder so she went back to nursery and she loved being back! She doesn't even say bye when I leave as she's playing with her friends. Never ever will I let my kids go to a childminder again.

 

[stardust1976]

Omg here in Ontario Canada we get a year ... I couldn't imagine walking away from my 6 week old baby for an hour let alone an entire work day ... That just seems crazy to me lol

Seems hard I know - here in Australia we have 6 months under the paid parental leave system - 6 months of stay at home time paid by the Government and that's in addition to any paid maternity leave that your employer offers. A lot of places will offer 6 or 12 weeks, or double that at half pay. And all places have a mandatory 12 months unpaid. So your job is secure if you are financially able to take a year off - they have to keep your position open for you for 12 months. I believe we now also have a paternity leave scheme to allow Dad's up to 2 weeks off paid at the same time. Although that is really new and I haven't looked into it that much.

I know two close friends who were (and are again now), working part time and both were able to take 6 full months off with money coming in.

Other than that we have long day care centres that will take babies from 6 weeks old (but that's a hard thing to do - I have done it with my kids but won't ever go that road again because it broke my heart having someone else raise my baby), or we have occasional care or family day care which is a much more personal option.

Could you hire your own nanny to look after your baby in your home?

 

[spunky84]

I'm so jealous of those who have 1 year maternity leave! I really feel 6 weeks just isn't long enough. I don't feel like there's much bonding time, especially if recovery time is needed.

I pay into short term disability at work which gives me 12 weeks paid and holds my job, but ive never seen anyone take more than 6-8 weeks for maternity. I'm not really sure how that works. I need to email my HR department for complete list of maternity benefits and procedures. If I can't take the full 12 weeks, I'm really hoping I can get signed of for at least 8, but 6 is most common.

I wouldn't mind if we found someone that was also watching other kids. When I was little, there were usually a few of us, and I don't recall it being a bad experience. Also for day care, it's so expensive. It'd probably take my entired take home pay, so I'd basically be working to have benefits.

I wouldn't mind considering someone coming to our home, which would probably be a better choice. The only thing that I find that will be very difficult in hiring a babysitter is trusting a complete stranger with your child.

It's unfortunate that DH's cousin lives so far away. His wife said if we lived closer, shed do it (she only works weekends so she can stay home with her daughter).

DH's mom used to babysit her niece and nephew years ago - like 18 years ago lol but she works M W F mornings.

DH's sister, K, is a SAHM but she already has a 14 mo old and will have a newborn in June. Plus it's something she'd hold over our head. It'd cause more problems than anything.

Then there is his sister E. She might, but I really don't know (she is close!). She doesn't have a job, but sometimes student teaches which would probably be the biggest conflict. She's ttc so I'm not sure how she'd feel about it and how it would work out long term when she does get pregnant/give birth. But I guess still an option though.

I've started trying to search online, but it's been so overwhelming. We're starting to ask around to see what other people are doing. I do plan ok asking my coworkers, but I live further than they do so probably any contacts will be out of the way for us - but if that's what we have to do it's what we have to do.

With any luck, we wot have to do this. I'm really hoping he can get the job at the university. He has some great contacts and references from there from when he went. Then we can both raise our kids - which is really important to us if not not completely practical. He'll still have weekends, holidays, vacation and benefits which is a lot more than he gets now. It'd be a $4 paycut but we'd end up with more money in the end, so it's just so perfect and would give anything for this job to work out.

 

[stardust1976]

I feel for you, I really do. I hope it all works out with the university job and you don't have to stress so much!

Fingers crossed!!

 

[kaths101]

It sounds like you are more comfortable with someone coming to your home, you could always do a few days trial, while your home and see how your LO takes to them, if it was me I would also install web cams so I can log on and see what LO is up to during the day!

It's hard, luckily I have family to look after jack, I wouldn't send him to a nursery or childminder either, I've seen some pretty bad ones!

 

[mamawanabe21]

I am so grateful for my 52 weeks maternity leave! I'm planning on returning to work part time at some point for a bit and am lucky enough that my mum is going to be my child care. Once I go full time, my child will be in playgroup/reception (pre-school?) so I'm not to worried as my job allows shifts to work around those hours

 

[JJWEBB]

Omg here in Ontario Canada we get a year ... I couldn't imagine walking away from my 6 week old baby for an hour let alone an entire work day ... That just seems crazy to me lol

I couldn't live off of disability pay for a year. I'll be off for 4.5 months. 3 of those will be disability pay which won't even cover my bills.

 

[spunky84]

Omg here in Ontario Canada we get a year ... I couldn't imagine walking away from my 6 week old baby for an hour let alone an entire work day ... That just seems crazy to me lol

I couldn't live off of disability pay for a year. I'll be off for 4.5 months. 3 of those will be disability pay which won't even cover my bills.

Thankfully the disability I pay into, 2/3 is paid by the company we put money into & my company pays the remaining 1/3. The only thing we don't get paid for is holidays, which is fine. I think I'll only be missing 1 day of pay.

So while we at least get good pay while we're off, I just wish it could be a little longer. I'd be stoked if I could do the full 12 weeks. I could even handle if I only got 2/3 of pay.