Cold feet

[Manicmum]

I am sorry i dont want to offend anyone with this post , but I think I am getting cold feet about the baby ,
I am 35 6 kids only just enough room at my house as it is , 1 with language difficulties which also includes level of understanding , which is extremely hard , to add to that her , and her brother fight endlessly , about who's right or wrong, who can eat faster , who's taller etc it where's me down.
I hate my self so much that I have done this, I am too old to be having pregnancy mistakes , , I know so many ppl want babies so bad hell , two years ago I was one that sobbed into my pillow at night begging to get pregnant, I worry I won't be able to make our house work, that my children ,( the youngest ) will suffer . My husband says that the baby just needs us , love and a roof over its head.
We tried to make decisions about our baby but we couldn't , cus I don't want to , I want this baby I guess the factors surrounding it worry me .
Let's not to mention all the negative comments I will get and already get , ( a mum up the school only the other week was ranting about how big family's have all the benefits( my oh works 6 days a week) have all the mod cons Tvs in every room I wish we are a one TV house hold we have 2 mobiles between us (me And my daughter) )
Ahh sorry about the. Rant there

 

[newmommy21]

You still have plenty of time to get ready for baby!! I think no matter what baby you are on it still has a huge life changing impact that is scary. But just think of all the positives in your life. I'm sure you, your husband, and your other kids will love this baby to death!

Keep your head up, and I hope things get easier for you.

 

[Spiffynoodles]

I think it boils down to one simple fact: Very few women look back on their life and regret having a child, but there are many that regret not having one. It will be hard, but a few years from now, you won't be able to imagine your life without this little one. My FIL is one of 8 kids, and he always talks about how much he loved it. His siblings are his best friends. Believe me, I have my moments of "What the crap was I thinking???" but I know that all the hard things will seem like small things in the long run.

 

[wonderstruck]

I'm not trying to sound rude but shouldn't you have thought about this before you got pregnant? It just breaks my heart to think of your baby being born unwanted and instead of forming a bond you are feeling regret. Hopefully it's just the hormones, prepartum depression maybe? I hope that you can come to appreciate and accept the life growing inside you so that he/she is born into nothing but love. Instead of worrying about the negatives, focus on the positives and try to prepare the best you can. I'm sure everything will work out just fine and you will look back and wonder how you ever felt this way.

 

[Manicmum]

I think it boils down to one simple fact: Very few women look back on their life and regret having a child, but there are many that regret not having one. It will be hard, but a few years from now, you won't be able to imagine your life without this little one. My FIL is one of 8 kids, and he always talks about how much he loved it. His siblings are his best friends. Believe me, I have my moments of "What the crap was I thinking???" but I know that all the hard things will seem like small things in the long run.

Thank u I think ur right , I think I am in the moment of Oh god , I do know all my children love being part of a big family , and one even says he wants ten children

 

[Manicmum]

You still have plenty of time to get ready for baby!! I think no matter what baby you are on it still has a huge life changing impact that is scary. But just think of all the positives in your life. I'm sure you, your husband, and your other kids will love this baby to death!

Keep your head up, and I hope things get easier for you.

I think I am just panicking thank u

 

[Manicmum]

I'm not trying to sound rude but shouldn't you have thought about this before you got pregnant? It just breaks my heart to think of your baby being born unwanted and instead of forming a bond you are feeling regret. Hopefully it's just the hormones, prepartum depression maybe? I hope that you can come to appreciate and accept the life growing inside you so that he/she is born into nothing but love. Instead of worrying about the negatives, focus on the positives and try to prepare the best you can. I'm sure everything will work out just fine and you will look back and wonder how you ever felt this way.

To be fair I have never said this baby is not wanted its, just difficult situation, my baby and babies are and will alwayed be loved by me my husband and each other , I just worry about the factors of space etc , and yes I should of thought about this before getting pregnant but then I wasn't intending I. Getting pregnant.. , and sadly I was only thinking about getting my leg over , i took ages to get pregnant with previous baby's and this time was the first time me and ️Oh had dtd in months for one reason or another so it never crossed my mind.
Sadly the negatives are to me important lack of room and no way of getting a bigger house etc will eventually become an issue ( albeit not for sometime )
I do understand how difficult my post might of been to read sorry if my postwas distressing too u , but not everybody's lives work the way they are intended and I am a big believer things happen for a reason whatever that maybe .

 

[Unexpected212]

I'm on number three and I panic sometimes about how I'm going to manage with the money and changing my job and all the washing and cooking etc...

Don't feel bad for how you are feeling. I think it's normal to worry to a degree. But if it starts affecting you really badly it could be pre natal depression and worth speaking to a doctor about?

Also the 'shouldn't you have thought about that before getting pregnant' isn't a very helpful comment as OP made it clear she wasn't planning this baby. Sometimes you just have to make the best of an unexpected situation.

 

[Tesh23]

In life there are always going to be things to worry about. That is a guaranteed fact. We worry about our kids, our relationships, our financial situations... It won't end. Guaranteed.

Do u know what that worry does? It pushes us to succeed in the toughest situations. No mother can not love or want their child, but we can worry about how we are going to manage and if we did the right thing. It's ok. It's normal. It should be encouraged! It shows u are not selfish and that u care deeply about your family and that's what makes a good mother.

Don't be scared to worry and don't be scared that it's going to be difficult. In all likelyhood it very much will be. But u won't be alone, and u will figure it out and make it work, because that's what good mother's do, and that is what strong families do. They have put their faith in u so put a little faith in them and enjoy every second of every minute of this little miracle growing inside u. It will only add to all the other miracles in your life. And one day u will look back and be happy and so proud of yourself and everythin u have achieved.

So mama what the lady down the road is saying comes from ignorance. This will not be the first ignorant person u meet or the last, but it will be one more to show u how strong u can be.

Hang in there, your hubby seems supportive and very reassuring, lean on each other when times get tough.

Everything will be ok, because you won't let it be any other way