Confused dad

[mark_p]

Hi All,

I'm a dad of a beautiful girl, whos almost 8 months old. Having had no previous experience with babies (never even held one), and with her being unplanned, it was all very difficult to get my head around, and the first few months were very tough, but slowly I got there and now I wouldnt change it for the world.
Maybe its normal baby behaviour and I'm being over sensitive, but we seem to go weeks where she just doesnt seem very happy, I know teething is happening etc and that cant be nice, but somedays she just seems so unhappy, its hard work even getting a smile out of her. Just this morning I woke her up, and whereas in times gone by, you might get a huge smile and kicking of the legs, she just seems to frown and look totally unimpressed. Silly noises, stupid faces, she just looks at you like your stupid!
My other half took her to jolly babies yesterday, and she was the only baby not to smile (even at their own mum), she was also the only baby not to cry, which I guess she deserves some credit for! but even so, she just doesnt seem very impressed with anything.
At the weekend she just moaned all day, she makes this groaning noise when she isnt best pleased, she did this for 11 hours on sunday on and off..
She has two teeth cut through already, and shes chewing like mad, so I think others are cutting through, so maybe its all down to teething, I dont know.
She started babbling last week and whether shes going through a growth spurt at the mo I dont know, but even when she wakes up at 6.30am (she has pretty much slept through for 11 hours since 6 weeks old), she still looks tired and still appears ratty!
She seems to come to life about 5pm, and we have an hour where I can usually make her laugh, playing peekaboo, although admittedly normal gently peekaboo doesnt work, it seems I have to actually jump out and scare her (something I thought that would be too frightening for her), but it seems not!
But even when she laughs, its like she cant quite let go and really really laugh, its almost like shes on edge, and still not quite sure about laughing.

I'm sure its all perfectly normal, and just what babies do, and maybe it is just growing pains, teething, but nobody gives you a manual I guess, and you start to think you have done something wrong when she appears unhappy most of the time.

Maybe I just expected to have this cute little smiling girl a bit too soon.

Mark

 

[Tsia]

I went through this stage.. and now at one year old I still get it from time to time.
Their personality is developing all the time, but as you said, teething, transferring from mushy to more solid foods and having less milk.. learning to crawl and walk cheers them up a little cos they feel free! but adjusting to all that before walking is all going on aswell.
Dont worry, it gets better as they get older.

 

[mark_p]

Thanks, I'm sure you're right, shes not crawling yet either, her age suggests it should be soon, but I guess she will when she's ready, she's sitting up ok, although starts to moan if she has to situp too long..

 

[Lu28]

It could just be frustration that she can't get to the things she wants so maybe just change her position in the room, the toys she can access etc to keep her stimulated. My LO was very moany just before she started crawling, I even took her to the doctor because I was sure there must have been a medical reason why my previously happy baby had disappeared! She didnt' crawl until 11 months though.

The other thing is that their personality is coming through so much more as they get older. We have days where Aisling is in a great mood and others where she just wakes up on the wrong side of the cot and is a right grump for most of the day, I think that's just how it goes.

Sounds like you're both doing a great job

 

[Tsia]

they get soooo much happier the more they move.
Crawling isnt a milestone.. some babies go straight to walking and crusing round the furniture without ever crawling. some only 'bum shuffle' lol

It must be so frustrating as a baby not being able to move yourself when you have all these inquisitive feelings inside.

I found alot of chirpy happy noises like.. wooooooooooooooooo!!!!! .. and .. yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyy!!!! in high pitched tones get babies moods up.
Worked for my grumpy little boy when he was feeling down cos of teething. (so much so my OH calls me mrs Woo sometimes cos I do it so often) lol

I also found that the teething powders took the edge off for him too. Think theyre called Ahston & Parsons? Go ask in boots if you havent already got them.

 

[Feltzy]

It sounds like teething, I remember when Evie was teething it was really hard work and she was upset a lot of the time. I think they also babble a lot more when they are teething, Alfie has just started to do this too.

Babies go through phases and I'm sure she'll grow out of it soon, don't beat yourself up about it.

 

[smokey]

Sounds like you have a pretty normal baby there.
For the first year they have so much going on, all this learning and taking everything in can be very taxing and confusing for them.
My LO does that moaning noise when hes bored and wants a change of activity and somtime you have to go through 101 things befor you find something hes ammused by.
when your places like baby group just because the dont smile doesnt always mean they arnt happy it just normaly means they are taking everything in.

Dont worry youll soon get loads of smile out of her soon enough, well at least untill the teen years then she probably go back to looking at you like your weird and stupid

I must say though it is nice to see a dad on here showing concern and trying to find answers, you sound like a very caring farther so please dont think its anything your doing wrong