Could use your input- WTT before moving across the world?

[bohemiangel]

Hi ladies!!!

Brand new here and would love some input on my somewhat unique WTT situation

I met the love of my life just over a year ago at a workshop in California. He was born and raised and currently lives in England. We knew pretty much right away that we were in love, and things have gotten progressively more serious throughout the year. He has flown out to the US to visit me every 2-3 months since we've gotten together, and my first trip to London is coming up next month We are both a little older, he more so than I (I'm 33 and he's 46), and are really anxious to start TTC for our first SOON- given our ages we know it could take a while! However, with arranging visas and packing up my life in the US and all, it's going to be another 6-7 months before I can actually join him in London.

We have a few trips lined up over the next 5 months or so, and one of them falls right in that "magic window!" We are seriously considering starting to try then, even though if (by magic) that first go were successful I would run the risk of being alone for the first few months of pregnancy. Also that would mean packing up and moving everything I own and a very long flight at about 4 months pregnant. (I know he would come out to help me move, so I wouldn't have to worry about the physical aspect of that.) It's more of the emotional stress of such a big move that concerns me, and I worry that it could cause a miscarriage.

Thanks for reading, and I would love to hear the experiences of anyone else who has had to move while pregnant (and hopefully it turned out ok?), or if anyone else has some thoughts to share in general! THANKS!!!

 

[RaspberryK]

I honestly don't think that you would struggle to conceive - you're 33 not 53 :-D
Emotional stress should not cause a miscarriage, neither will packing or moving.
But the first months of pregnancy can be a lot harder and more exhausting that you can ever imagine.
I would personally wait till you were settled in the uk before trying.
It's also lovely to have constant support during those anxious months.
That being said if you have good health care insurance in the us then you could make good use of it as the lack of scans and tests in the uk might surprise you.
Xx

 

[bohemiangel]

Thanks, RaspberryK! I appreciate your optimism about my future prospects for conception You're right- I haven't even started trying yet and I'm already worried about it taking too long! And yes, I would truly love to have my SO's support during those first few months. Managing morning sickness and the emotional ups and downs would be difficult on my own, especially when I'm working full time here

 

[RaspberryK]

I'm presuming you're not on the birth control pill?
Are your cycles regular etc? You could start monitoring them and charting and looking into cervical mucus.
Start taking a prenatal vitamin and get your body baby ready.
Xx

 

[Nikki_d72]

Hi there - I married a guy from NZ (I'm from the UK) and we came back to the UK for a while (turned into 7 years!) When we were finally ready to return here to NZ I still had to get a visa and if I had gotten pregnant then I would have "failed" the health part of the visa, even though I was fine to get pregnant the minute I got my visa approved and came here! So it may be worth a read of what's required for your UK visa regarding health checks etc or have you done that bit yet?

I would also agree that your age shouldn't hinder you at all, I had my 1st at 30 and my second at 40! Maybe use the time to take folic acid and get your body ready, good luck, love a good love story!! xxx

 

[bohemiangel]

Hi RaspberryK,

Nope, not on birth control and my cycles are very regular. Average is around 27-28 days. I think starting to chart is a great idea! I went to the library yesterday and checked out "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." What a great resource! I'm so new to all this charting stuff that it will probably take me a few cycles just to get the hang of it. And besides, it'll give me something to do in the meantime that makes me feel like I'm being proactive

And Nikki_d72, thank you for sharing your experience. That is a really great point about pregnancy possibly causing my visa application to be rejected. I hadn't even considered that! Certainly going to start doing some more research on health checks required for the visa, like, NOW.

Thank you so much, you ladies are a wealth of great information!

 

[RaspberryK]

Yeah I think it's a great tool in general not just for ttc but knowing your body, preventing pregnancy, you can check that your lp (between ov and your period) is long enough and alter it if it's not.
Xx