Crying constantly

[firsttimer80]

Any advice welcome please, i just dont know what else to do.
Lo is 2 weeks old and basically cries all day and night.
He wont sleep in day so i know he is over tired, we cant put him down as he cries.
He cant seem to just lie on his play mat or in his basket without crying. He certainly wont sleep.
At present he seems to be rooting all the time, i have had to start BFing him every 2 hours now, but he starts sucking his hands withing about 1.5 hours.
Just cant seem to get him content.
Putting him down at night is horrid as he will scream for at least an hour, sometimes more. We always check him every 10-15 mins, try to comfort him until he finally goes to sleep but its so hard to try not to give in and pick him up. But if we do that at night we cant even eat dinner!!
Whatever we do he cries!! It is heartbreaking and i feel like a failure as i cant seem to do right.
Any ideas what is making him cry all the time?

 

[raylynn]

He may be going through a growth spurt. Whenever my lo goes through a growth spurt I'm feeding him constantly. I do think yours at 2 weeks is crying because he needs something. Also if he has reflux it might be painful for him to lie flat, you could try propping the mattress up or putting him in a reclined position to get some sleep.

 

[Lilysmum17]

Hi, hugs to you the first couple of months are the hardest, I'm didnt breastfeed so cant comment in particular relating to that but rooting seems like he's hungry, or not satisfying his suckling instinct ? i think breastfed babies tend to feed more regular and maybe your milk isnt fully established yet, does he seem satisfied after a feed and is he feeding well ? Also you say he is screaming for up to an hour but your checking on him every 15 mins, not judging but at this young age i wouldn't leave him crying pick him up and cuddle him, its a very new daunting world and this age and may just want his mummy and reassurance, and this may sound harsh but you may have to forego you and your hubby settling down for a nice dinner together, these first few months you'll have to eat with one hand, take turns, whatever it takes ! but it will get easier, i couldnt put my lo down for the first 5 weeks and she gradually just got better and better, i also co-slept (which i swore id never do !) to make night times easier as she just loved being close to me at night. then gradually put her into crib for more and more during night, now she wouldnt sleep with me even if i wanted ! some babies just like being held and close to mummy

 

[Lilysmum17]

Also have you thought about using a sling ? Is he more content when your holding him and will he fall asleep on you ? x

 

[stardust599]

It's really normal for a newborn to want to feed constantly for the first 6weeks or more. Put him in a sling and let him have as much boobie as he wants, he's growing and establishing your supply.

Let him feed as much as he wants, he sounds hungry, don't set a time on feeds.

Try swaddling and a dummy and white noise for sleep.

Don't let him cry hun, he's too little and doesn't know any better - he just wants to be close to Mummy.

Hugs, I know how hard it is xxx

 

[taloolah]

I couldnt move for libby the first 12 weeks, she slept on me all the time, it just stopped all of a sudden, he will be upping your supply, if your worried, take him to GP maybe he has a touch colic or relux? is he sick at all? he is still really teeny hun, it gets easier xxx

 

[special_kala]

why arnt you piking him up? 15 minutes is a very long time to cry. EDIT -over a hour is very very long

You need to bf on demand, hunger could be contributing to his crying.

Your baby NEEDS comfort

 

[taloolah]

oh I just re-read after last comment, I wouldnt let him cry this young I agree, he needs to form attachments and is still in the "fourth trimester" he doesnt realise he isnt still attached to you, please give him cuddles, they grow so fast become independent and soon dont want any, relish them while you can x

 

[blinkybaby]

why arnt you piking him up? 15 minutes is a very long time to cry. EDIT -over a hour is very very long

You need to bf on demand, hunger could be contributing to his crying.

Your baby NEEDS comfort

Just thought I'd let you know that your tone here doesn't read very well - she's a new mum and obviously working things out, there's no need to be so blunt.

When Louie was little he would be on and off the breast for hours on end, it was hell. Just let him eat when he wants hun, even 1.5 hours between feeds is a pretty long amount of time for a newborn. Try not to establish a routine until he's a bit older, you will only stress yourself out. If things don't improve you could look into the possibility of gastric troubles like reflux or trapped wind.

 

[Lauki]

Feeding every 1.5-2 hours is completely normal for a breastfed (or formula fed baby).. Sophie still feeds every 2 hours during the day, unless she manages a nap longer than that! Just keep feeding him on demand and just get through these first few weeks! Sophie would sometimes be feeding for 6 hours straight (clusterfeeding) and it's all just normal newborn behavior. Most babies your LO's age just need comfort and cuddles for sleeping, please don't leave him to cry! When he's a bit older you can help him to sleep independently (I'm doing the No Cry Sleep Solution with Sophie now for instance).

Anyway, feed on demand, it's probably why he cries so much! Sophie would never go more than an hour without a feed unless she'd be sleeping/napping longer than that. It will all settle down in a few weeks and he'll become more independent too!

for now! I know it's hard and you can completely feel like a milk machine, but I remember the nights that I sat nrusing Sophie while my husband either fed me or cut my food up in bits I could just prick with my fork and eat one handed! It'll pass, I promise ! Sophie now happily sits in her swing while we have our dinner and watches us! Then after dinner we do her bedtime routine so it all works out!

 

[Ziggy2]

your baby needs your constant comfort at this age, leaving a 2 week old to cry will not teach him to go to sleep independently he just needs your comfort and reassurance, don't worry about creating bad habits just do whatever works at this age. They do grow out of it, let him sleep on you during the day, and rock him to sleep at night - you can break this habit gradually - a good book is the no cry sleep solution. Please don't leave your newborn to cry

 

[special_kala]

why arnt you piking him up? 15 minutes is a very long time to cry. EDIT -over a hour is very very long

You need to bf on demand, hunger could be contributing to his crying.

Your baby NEEDS comfort

Just thought I'd let you know that your tone here doesn't read very well - she's a new mum and obviously working things out, there's no need to be so blunt.

When Louie was little he would be on and off the breast for hours on end, it was hell. Just let him eat when he wants hun, even 1.5 hours between feeds is a pretty long amount of time for a newborn. Try not to establish a routine until he's a bit older, you will only stress yourself out. If things don't improve you could look into the possibility of gastric troubles like reflux or trapped wind.

im laying here with willow asleep on me so am not going ti type massive replys as i cock them up anywat

but im sorry i dint understand why the op wouldnt pick a tiny baby up anyway. its not something i nderstand tbh.

its not necessarily a judgement btw

 

[sapphire1]

The early days are HARD. I'm afraid the only way to stop him crying is to tend to his needs. As the others say, the rooting means he's hungry, and if he won't go to sleep unless he's being held, then you need to hold him. Holly wouldn't sleep for the first few weeks unless she was being held. DH and I took it in turns to hold her for a couple of hours each through the night, because as soon as we put her down she screamed. I had never been so exhausted, and I was even hallucinating at one point. We also didn't eat properly for weeks, just grabbed bits here and there, and never ate proper meals.

If you're BF, maybe get someone to check your latch to make sure LO is getting enough milk. Expect LO to be pretty much constantly feeding for the first few weeks, as your supply is regulated. If you have any family or friends that have offered to help you, take it. I think that's what was hardest for me - all my family were hundreds of miles away so it was just me and DH.

It's harsh because nobody warns you it can be like this, and some babies are just needier than others. But a newborn cries for a reason, they're not capable of manipulation at such a young age.

It honestly does get easier, but you have to ride out the first few weeks. Good luck and lots of x x

 

[blinkybaby]

why arnt you piking him up? 15 minutes is a very long time to cry. EDIT -over a hour is very very long

You need to bf on demand, hunger could be contributing to his crying.

Your baby NEEDS comfort

Just thought I'd let you know that your tone here doesn't read very well - she's a new mum and obviously working things out, there's no need to be so blunt.

When Louie was little he would be on and off the breast for hours on end, it was hell. Just let him eat when he wants hun, even 1.5 hours between feeds is a pretty long amount of time for a newborn. Try not to establish a routine until he's a bit older, you will only stress yourself out. If things don't improve you could look into the possibility of gastric troubles like reflux or trapped wind.

im laying here with willow asleep on me so am not going ti type massive replys as i cock them up anywat

but im sorry i dint understand why the op wouldnt pick a tiny baby up anyway. its not something i nderstand tbh.

its not necessarily a judgement btw

Fair enough

I think some people are subject to older people telling them what's best for baby (think mums and MILs) which leads to old fashioned ways of parenting such as leaving them to cry too early etc. I know before I had Louie I thought this was the best way but obviously when he arrived I was the complete opposite!

xxx

 

[firsttimer80]

Blimey, i didnt expect all the pointing of fingers!! i wont bother quoting the comments that have upset me here as its obvious which comments would have.
As for picking him up, WE DO!! all day every day. We co slept from the day we got back from hospital as he wouldnt settle alone.
In the past few days though he still cries in our bed, no matter where he is.
We literally hold him all day between the 2 of us as if we put him down he cries.
So please do not suggest we just leave him to cry for hours as we dont.
I am hardly eating so my priority isnt 'having a meal with hubby' as someone put it, but i have to eat as i am breastfeeding!! I am not hungry due to being sick with worry about why he cries so i have to force myself to eat.
I am feeding max every 2 hours or before if he demands it. His weight gain was very good at last so there isnt an issue with my milk, if anything it comes out too quick so i have to slow the flow to stop him being sick and coughing.
It is true that the older generation say to leave them cry for a bit, which i find hard to deal with.
If co-sleeping would comfort him now and we could do it SAFELY i would do it. Perhaps someone could advise on a safe way to do this? ... instead of making me feel like a bad mom.
As i say, at present even when we pick him up he still cries, so whatever we do he is crying.
I always make sure he has a clean nappy and is fed, winded, not to warm or cold etc to eliminate the obvious but still he cries.

 

[RebaRezzelba]

Hi - maybe baby isn't getting enough boob juice so it might be worth expressing into a bottle to see if your producing enough. He could be starving and that's why he's crying. is baby gaining enough weight?

Also as someone else said it couldbe reflux - my baby has it too and cries alot until we got a thickener for his formula.

The first 6 weeks are a nightmare with constant feeding too but hang in there. My baby is 8 wks now and feeds every 3.5 hrs approx and longer at night (4.5 hrs) so it does get slightly easier.

 

[kimber89]

perhaps a touch of colic..our LO cried and cried the first few days. we started using colic drops and ever since she seems much better. is he getting his burps up maybe trapped wind.hopefully he starts settling for you soon xx

 

[blinkybaby]

Google the 4th trimester hun, it explains a lot about why some babies cry and cry. They just need that extra closeness. I would definitely get a wrap, it worked wonders for Louie and freed my hands up to do bits around the house such as make myself a bit to eat. It's great that your milk is flowing so well as well.

And one final thing, your LO is a cutie. It's bloody hard those first few weeks, please try not to feel like you are doing anything wrong, as long as you are there for him when he cries, that's all that matters.

 

[firsttimer80]

why arnt you piking him up? 15 minutes is a very long time to cry. EDIT -over a hour is very very long

You need to bf on demand, hunger could be contributing to his crying.

Your baby NEEDS comfort

I am feeding on demand!!! I am fully aware about hunger as its basic knowledge. I feed 2 hourly if he doesn't demand it, but if he wants it before then i feed him!
I know he needs comfort and believe me we give it to him constantly.
He is NEVER left to cry for over an hour, i didnt say that. I would never do that, i couldnt do that as it rips my heart out!!
He cries for that long no matter what we do, its not that we just leave him in a room crying!!!
I love him more than anything in the world and just wanted advice.

 

[special_kala]

ok im sorry but you did say he rys for over a hour but you check on him every 15 minutes which does suggest hes left.

we co sleep it can be done safely, the pillow is nowhere near her and we hav e seperate covers (mine tucked under me), she sleeps on my side o bed with bed guard.

I know its awkward but eat with one hand, it wont last forever.

Ignore the oldiies who say leave him, he needs you. he cant manipulate and wont be clingy if you pick him up.

Does he fall asleep on the breast? dont worry about him feeding to sleep, its fine. BF is as much about comfort as it is food.

It will get better but atm its best to do whatever your baby needs as hard and tiring as it is