Curse of the firsts

[AmandaW525]

I miscarried on New Years Eve morning and just when I think I am starting to come out of the haze, something hits me like a ton of bricks. I am finding the hardest part to be the unexpected "firsts". Like the first time you go back to work, the first time you drink an alcoholic beverage, the first time you go back to the OB. They each made me break down. Like returning to normal life meant I was forgetting my baby. Anyone else feel this?

Some of these "firsts" I expected to be hard, but some have come out of nowhere. This weekend was full of the unexpected firsts. We went to church and it was terribly hard. I also went to a family gathering and I have three new baby boy cousins (all born in August-September 2014). I didn't expect seeing babies to be so hard but I had to leave. I also had way too many family members come up to me and tell me they had been through it too and somehow they just made it seem like I should be over it by now. I was about to loose it. And later at home I did break down. I never know when these moments are coming and it's making it hard to get on with my normal activities.

 

[cherrished]

Awwww hun I'm so sorry for your loss, I really do understand how hard it is, I lost my 2nd baby New Years eve 2011 and I still think about it till this day, you really need to give yourself some grieving time, it's so hard especially when people around you are pregnant or just had babies, honestly hun things will get better in time and you may even give trying another go, I'm sending you loads of hugs, when I had my MC & chemical
Pregnancy s it felt like I had no one to
Talk too, I felt no one understood me or what I had just been through, but babyandbump and all the lovely ladies
On here kept me sane, if you ever need to talk we are always here xx

 

[cherrished]

What you are feeling is totally normal hun it's part of the grieving but things will defaintly get easier you just need time xx

 

[AmandaW525]

Awwww hun I'm so sorry for your loss, I really do understand how hard it is, I lost my 2nd baby New Years eve 2011 and I still think about it till this day, you really need to give yourself some grieving time, it's so hard especially when people around you are pregnant or just had babies, honestly hun things will get better in time and you may even give trying another go, I'm sending you loads of hugs, when I had my MC & chemical
Pregnancy s it felt like I had no one to
Talk too, I felt no one understood me or what I had just been through, but babyandbump and all the lovely ladies
On here kept me sane, if you ever need to talk we are always here xx

Thank you for reassuring me. I don't expect to ever get over it but I do keep waiting for the day where it gets easier and that day hasn't come yet. I definitely find my sanity from the people on this board.

 

[Cloveredwards]

Firsts are the worst! I have moments where I think I'm ok and then all of a sudden something triggers and I just loose it. I few weeks ago I just completely lost it and cried for hours and hours. I hope you're doing a bit better today? x

 

[AmandaW525]

Firsts are the worst! I have moments where I think I'm ok and then all of a sudden something triggers and I just loose it. I few weeks ago I just completely lost it and cried for hours and hours. I hope you're doing a bit better today? x

Exactly! I am doing better since I am at least getting some sleep now.