D & C scheduled for thurs - not coping... UPDATE PG 4

[SmileyShazza]

Sorry to hear you had such a rubbish experience Smidgen

I hope you have someone looking after you, rest up and try and get some sleep even if it's just 40 winks here and there.

 

[smidgen]

thanks again ladies for all your kind words and support. I've got my OH, my parents and my little brother fussing round me but sometimes its just nice to come on here and talk to those who really understand what you're going thru. am feeling abit better tonight, and am so so tired - fingers crossed i get a sleep tonight as my eyes are nearly hanging down to my mouth! xx

 

[BeanieBaby]

Hi Smidgen,

Firstly just wanted to say how sorry I am I didn't get around to wishing you good luck for your procedure yesterday, its been a hectic week as been bowled over by this nasty cold so struggling to keep up with all the threads!

I am so sorry to hear that you had a bad experience after we all gave you such reassurance that all would be quite painless. My procedure kept getting put back too so I understand how that feels, they kept chopping and changing the rota and in the end my OH had to go and top up the parking (as they said this would be ok as not going in for another hr) and then they sent me in 5 mins later so I didn't even have anyone with me when I was wheeled into theatre. More upsetting for him I think and I know he was beside himself when he got back to my empty cubicle, so can fully appreciate your OH must have been v. concerned with you being gone so long.

Its such a shame you had such poor treatment and what sounded like v. unsupportive doctors and nurses. All I can think is that they were winding down for xmas early and weren't putting in 100%, but that's no excuse!

After reading all these threads I feel sad that I wasn't given any options for our baby's remains either, like Tullip and I believe that's because after histology has finished with him/her that will be it. They gave me the impression there wasn't much to see, even through they brought out the container to show me which was a little strange. I think as our baby developed v. slowly even though I was nearly 10 wks it was the size of a 6 wks old baby, even though they said it was still growing the wk before, all v. strange, so perhaps that's why I wasn't given any options, as it was only about 4.5mm so quite hard to find! It does make me feel quite sad though as it doesn't matter what size they are they are still our babies.

I do hope you're a little more comfortable now and am glad to hear you have lots of people looking after you. I wish you a speedy recovery, but don't rush it unnecessarily, make sure you get lots of rest and you let yourself be pampered for a few days!

Lots of love and huge

xxx

 

[smidgen]

Hi Beanie


That must have been terrible for you and your OH - you'd think they could have hung on for 5 mins until he got back!

The nurses were particularly insensitive and very loud - laughing and carrying on. I was in a bay with 3 old biddies - i guess they thought they were deaf and were trying to cheer them up after their gynae ops but had no consideration at all for me sitting there for 5hrs before I got taken to theatre!

What do you mean when you say they brought you out the container - did you get to see your baby before they'd taken him/her to histology?

The pain is easing off - or maybe its just that I have continually topped up the meds... I don't seem to have any bleeding now though - is that normal - and I'd say I am not managing to pee normally yet - not a real flow if you know what i mean...

 

[BeanieBaby]

Hi hun

I know it was all v. strange, they did ask if I wanted to hang on but they gave me the impression if I did I might be bumped back quite a bit so I didn't wanna risk them changing the rota yet again so said I was ok to go in. I just wanted to get it over with and get home!

Sounds like a complete nightmare! There were a couple of biddies on my ward too but they were the quiet ones, like you say the nurses are v. loud and just carry on. I was supposed to sleep for an hr after the op before they'd let me go home but the nurses were making so much noise I couldn't sleep so in the end got OH to ask if we could go.

Well when I came around from my op tears just started streaming down my face. I just kept saying to the docs "I didn't say a prayer and I didn't say goodbye", as I had been concentrating so much on getting through the op, I think i'd detached myself from what was happening as was my way of getting through it. I had actually been thinking about my toddler as I went under as there were some Tweenies hanging from the ceiling above me and its her fave programme. Well when I woke it immediately hit me, the guilt that I had been thinking of Bella and not the baby that was being taken from me as they put me under and that I should have said my goodbyes. I know now I had already had and still have plenty of time to say my goodbyes and prayers, in the privacy of my own home rather than in an operating theatre, but at the time I cried all the way back to OH but then calmed down.

When the doc was trying to console me after the op when I was still in theatre, he said did I want to see and I said I didn't think there would be much to see and the doc said "Don't worry there is i'll arrange it". Well I stupidly was thinking of my baby as being bigger than it actually was and thought they meant the baby but then the nurse brought through this large plastic container full of what looked like just blood. I was horrified and felt really stupid for even thinking I would be able to see something, as the baby was obviously a tiny part of the contents of that container and I just wish I had said no as was quite traumatic. So no I didn't get to see my baby before they took him/her away to histology

I stopped bleeding completely the day after my op but then the next day I did start again and this continued for about a wk on and off. It would tail off if I was relaxing and putting my feet up but whenever I overdid it or excerted myself a bit too much it started up again. I did have a few cramps but mainly due to the uterus stretching back so this is to be expected. Don't worry if your bleeding doesn't pick up again though as some people just have a bit of spotting and that's it and Shazza had nothing after the op and has been fine.

I'd keep an eye on your 'pee' situation, I didn't experience any problems with this so after their concerns and the talk of them wanting to catheterise you perhaps its worth giving them a call tomorrow, as the last thing you need on top of this is a urinary tract infection!

Take care and if you need anything at all i'm just a PM away.

xxx

 

[smidgen]

thanks beanie. am off to bed now as totally exhausted - hopefully i will get my first nights sleep in a week!

xx

 

[BeanieBaby]

No worries hun, sleep tight! xxx

 

[Midnight_Fairy]

Hugs hun x

 

[smidgen]

slept for a mammoth 14hrs!!!! Must have needed it though as I hadn't slept properly for over 1 week! So woke up this afternoon feeling much better physically although still an emotional wreck... it just takes time, i know...

 

[Tulip]

Thank goodness you slept well, I was worried. Next step: emotional (yeah right). Don't rush yourself x

 

[BeanieBaby]

So glad you slept well, wow 14hrs, that's amazing, you obviously needed it so keep it up! Keep us posted on how you're getting on.

xxx

 

[smidgen]

well just had another day of sleeping mainly and some tearful moments with OH - can't sleep tonight though as have obviously slept too much during the day x

 

[BeanieBaby]

Sorry to hear you've had more tears, its still v. early days so its not surprising, just give yourself time. It sounds like your body clock's a little out with all the sleep you're having but I still think its good that you go with the flow and sleep when you need to as its your body's way of telling you to slow down and rest. I hope you manage to get some sleep tonight and feel better tomorrow. xxx

 

[smidgen]

have got appt with gp tomorrow morning so am hoping he will sign me off work for a few weeks and am also going to ask him if he will prescribe higher folic acid dose. oh - and the postie (on a sunday) delivered letter this morning with our appt for recurrent miscarriage clinic - 1st feb

 

[debgreasby]

Glad you got your appointment. It will hopefully give you something positive to focus on xxx

 

[BeanieBaby]

This is all great news hun, glad to hear you're being looked after. Let us know how you get on at the docs. xxx

 

[Tulip]

Yeah let us know how docs goes mate. Interested to see how they take your monster Folic Acid request. Gonna try and see mine tomorrow see if he'll sign me off for a week, as well as prescription for the FA (I got some from Boots as a stopgap and 12 little pills a day is a bit much!)

Glad you got your appointment too - as Deb says, something to focus on.
xx

 

[smidgen]

well girls, was up most of the night with bad abdo pains so had gp appt this morning. i have also been sweating a lot today and a little lightheaded. The GP was lovely and when i went in, he came over, gave me a wee rub on the shoulder and said he was sorry and sometimes Christmas is just so shit... not half right! GP took my temp as soon as i went in and it was 38.2! He says that given the high temp, sweats, shakiness and abdo pain he thinks i have an infection following the d & c and gave me some antibiotics. he also signed me off work until 5th jan. i didn't ask him about the 5mg folic acid as my mind was otherwise distracted with the pain etc. I've also had problems with bowels - not had a bowel movement for 8 days - was too scared to go when I had spotting last sunday and then was even more scared to go when it was confirmed ruby's heart had stopped as was worried i'd start to miscarry naturally again, then with after d & c have been on tramadol so am totally bunged up. GP gave glycerine suppos. - nice - not. Haven't tried them yet as am feeling really sick at the mo without having to run back and forth to loo!

 

[Tulip]

Wow everything to do with that op has been proper shite. So sorry you're feeling grotty Smidge. Sending all my get-well love. Pills and suppos will get you working properly again soon Oh no, do the ABs mean you're off the booze for Chrimbo?
xx

 

[smidgen]

doc said i could have a drink with them if i wanted - not really in the mood though... how's u tulip?